[Juliepulie]

Hey guys,

I have been struggling with my weight for a while now, so I thought: hey, let's start this journal thing and see if it works out.
I'm not actually overweight, but a little too chubby for my liking. I am frustrated with myself that I don't seem to have the discipline to lose some weight. I also sometimes go on a binge and I really want to get it under control. If anyone has any tips for me, feel free to share. I'm not even sure what causes them. Stress perhaps, as I have a quite stressy job: I'm a journalist. Or maybe boredom, because these binges often happen when I'm not doing anything or I don't have exciting stuff in the near future to look forward to.

Anyway, I just had one. I came home from a family thing and I had told myself, driving home, that I would go for a run and afterwards prepare a healthy meal for myself. I ended up coming home and it was as if I couldn't control myself: I prepared a quick wrap (with a lot of cheese, d'oh) and then I also had some oatmeal. I haven't gone for that run. Well done, Jules...

I want to have an awesome body and feel good about myself. I know it sounds silly and superficial, but hey, can't help it. You've only got one body. And one life. So I want to make the best out of it. Maybe it's not even about looking good. Maybe it's just about control. And feeling as if I'm in control over my body, makes me more confident, I think. Today I normally was going to a party, but I canceled because I felt ugly and fat. I really don't want that to happen in the future. I know it's stupid. But that's how it was.

Okay, so, yes! I'm not going to weigh myself yet because I'm afraid of what my weight is at the moment (I'm pretty sure I gained quite some weight over the past weeks and I'm afraid I'd lose my motivation if I'm right.) So for now, I'm just gonna list my goals
- nett calories a day: 1200
- at least 15 minutes exercise (crunches, squatts...)
- longer exercise (run, cycle) at least 3 time a week
- Weight goal: 58 kg. (I'm 1m68)

Tomorrow I want to go for a morning run Feel free to pinch me if I don't stick to it.