This, just to reiterate what I was trying to say in my previous post.
You never know how much time you will ever have with any person and the amount of "woulda/coulda/shoulda" when they're taken unexpectedly can be crushing. Pass on the pie and mashed potatoes, not your parents (well, unless they're toxic hot messes, but that's another thread ...)
I agree too! I LOVE LOVE(!) doing all the holiday cooking in our house and last year relatives came to stay with us and helped cook too, which went okay...Since last year's holidays, we've already lost a close family member....Don't give up time with your loved ones....If gaining 15 pounds meant bringing back my brother in law, I'd do it in a heartbeat
I love the holidays more now that I've gotten over them being all about the food. It's no "indulgence" or "treat" to go pig out and carry those extra ounces and pounds around for the rest of my life. Nope.
If you go into a holiday thinking it's a big treat or splurge to overeat or eat a ton of empty calories, you'll be much more likely to overeat or to eat things your body doesn't want. (No, my body doesn't want that pie, even though I may have trained it to "need" it. I can train it not to "need" it.)
I eat reasonably, I no longer even like desserts (slow transition, HUGE payoffs, I'm finally FREE), and I can honestly say the only thing I'm "missing" is the extra weight. I enjoy the day more, I'm more focused on the real meanings of holidays, I enjoy family and friends more, etc.
So maybe some kind of middle ground would give you a better long-term result. Only you know that, though. If you feel that skipping a day will help you transition to a healthier lifestyle, then go for it. If you think a calm approach to reasonable portions of all the food works best, then do that. The most important thing is where you mind is in all of it. If you tell yourself you'll be deprived without the food, or without overeating, that's exactly what you'll experience.
Well, I'll chime in here because I've skipped holidays for a long, long time. My husband has worked for a major dept. store for over 40 years and frankly, he's suffered from holiday burn-out for oh, like 30 of them, seriously. He's glutted with Christmas before most people start shopping for Halloween candy.
Around the same time our kids were moving out all of our parents died within a year of each other. My mother then one year later hubby's mother and father within 12 hours of each other (unrelated deaths, just freaky circumstances, they'd been divorced over 35 years). Anyway, that was all the family we have anywhere nearby. Between his job overshadowing the holiday season and being empty nesters and not much in the way of friends making a big deal out of holidays is really pointless.
The one thing I will say is that you do have this odd feeling of being "left out". Like you're not doing something you should be. Especially if you're not getting together with family or friends, it's very strange and even after having done it for years we still feel it.
Honestly, I don't miss eating the food (I lost a lot of that when I became gluten intolerant) so much as I miss being in the kitchen and preparing it with my mother. She's been gone 10 years now and that's the one thing I think about that still gets me. I really miss cooking with someone who knows what they're doing!
It's interesting how different stages of life compel one to celebrate the holidays. My parents live alone in Europe, with one child in the USA (me) and one child long passed away. They don't look forward to holidays much, don't do much in terms of decoration and refuse to get a christmas tree. They did the hupla with us when we were growing up but it seems they are past that stage and maybe feel guilty enjoying a holiday now.
I on the other hand have a young son and want to make every season and every holiday the most fun it can be, I don't want to miss an opportunity to do something seasonal. At the moment we are immersed in autumnal activities such as apple and pumpkin picking, hay rides, halloween activities, hiking in the woods to see the changing leaves, decorating the house and making pies lol.
Which leads me to say to the OP that holidays are not just about food. They are about traditions and seasonal activities. Food is in the background, it won't be in the foreground unless you make it the most important thing. We can't shield ourselves from life, food will always be there.
I also find that there are too many things to eat during the holidays. I don't really want to eat a lot of pumpkin pie. I'm happy with a cinammon candle stick to make the room smell good, a bowl of apples on the table to make me feel autumnal and pumpkin spice flavored coffee (the flavored coffee grounds, not the expensive latte type) to make me feel warm and fuzzy and in the spirit of the season. There are plenty of ways to celebrate without relying solely on food.
The holidays were depressing and angry times in my past. I had an ugly family to be honest, and I distanced myself many years ago, so I don't have the problem of debating on whether to skip a huge get-together or not.
Having said that...I still plan to make a Thanksgiving dinner on Monday for me and my bf. It'll be roasted chicken, mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce, gravy, turnips, carrots and an apple pie for dessert. We'll have a nice merlot that we've been keeping.
Knowing the gorging that I'll be doing on an otherwise fasting day for me, I have planned to fast on Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday of next week to compensate.
Even though it's just me and my bf (he has no family here and neither of us has close friends), it's a tradition I'd like to continue for our own 2-peson family memories!
Last edited by Chardonnay; 10-09-2014 at 06:01 PM.
Don't skip a family holiday gathering because you're dieting. If you gain a few pounds over the holiday, you can lose them again. But time with family you can't get back.
I wholeheartedly agree with NCChickie. My family is so precious to me I couldn't think of not being with them. I am lucky that we only celebrate the holidays with food on each holiday day. So it's not like we feast for days with lots of parties.
Last edited by Jesslan Rose; 10-09-2014 at 08:16 PM.
My plan at family holiday lunch and dinner meals is to cover my plate with low calorie vegetables and use meat and high calorie dishes as a garnish to my vegetables. Good luck with your plan, too.
