I've struggled with my weight for close to 10 years. My lowest weight was 130, my goal has always been to make it into the 120s. But every time I get close, I screw up.
The first time I backslid it was due to an abusive relationship that took me 4 years to get out of. This time it was due to an abusive work environment in which I stand 40 hours a week.
I ballooned from 132 to 142 in a matter of 2 months. When I tell myself I'll go to the gym, I break that promise because after standing 8 hours I'm just too tired. I tried going this morning, before work, and it only made me sad. I have a 5k coming up and I can barely jog a mile let alone 3+. My pants almost don't fit.
I know I'll just have to work my way back to where I was but today I'm very sad.
I agree- sounds like you have a bad job- that can take every ounce of willpower just to go to it, and deal with it. It makes it harder to have willpower for other things. Studies show we have a sort of fixed amt of will power. If you can, I would look for a better job that you like more.
Don't force yourself to go to the gym if your body is truly too tired to go. Focus on improving your eating habits- it is a lot more sensible to simply not have a cookie then to try to make your worn out body burn it off. Quitting a job and starting a new one isn't an easy option for everyone especially in this economy. What you need to do is make peace with the job as it is. Remember that you can't control other people but you can change how you react in certain situations. It will get better. Just be brave and take it one day at a time.
Get a different job. It can't be worth your sanity and confidence.
I wish it were as simple as you make it sound.
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Originally Posted by Locke
Don't force yourself to go to the gym if your body is truly too tired to go. Focus on improving your eating habits- it is a lot more sensible to simply not have a cookie then to try to make your worn out body burn it off.
Thanks, I'll try mixing the two - not overdoing the gym if I'm tired but cut back on junk.
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Quitting a job and starting a new one isn't an easy option for everyone especially in this economy.
Thank you for getting it!
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What you need to do is make peace with the job as it is. Remember that you can't control other people but you can change how you react in certain situations. It will get better. Just be brave and take it one day at a time.
I'm working on it; I tried talking to managers and it basically went nowhere. I was reassured today by a higher up that he'd help but it was all bull. After many reports over 2+ years, they're still trying to "rehabilitate" her but let's just call it what it is - it's abuse, she's abusive, and she's disgusting for it. I'm trying to make myself not care. My Dad was always so tough, if people got in his face he'd either get in theirs or laugh in their faces and walk out. He was so tough, I just wish I could look her in the face and answer like an equal, even if she's trying to smash me into the ground.
I don't think that it's krampus 'didn't get it.' She gave sound advice. Why be miserable in a career? I'm not telling you to quit a job before you have another one, but I would definitely be looking.
Dollfaise, you might considering popping by Ask a Manager to check out some of the questions and advice on dealing with difficult work situations. AAM is a very cool lady with lots of solid advice on the job front, maybe something there will give you an idea? Also, she's a big advocate of trying different options, then dusting off your resume and looking elsewhere if things don't work out because life is too short to put up with a soul sucking job if you can help it. I hope things improve for you soon.
My mom recently was having a huge issue at her job working with a manager who was just 100% awful. It was a really bad situation. She kept going to the boss above her about it and he kept blowing her off, not returning phone calls, not dealing with it at all. So finally she went above him and it wasn't easy but finally they listened and she was able to get transferred.
So don't give up there. If the people right above her won't listen try to go to someone higher up if there is.
And Idk perhaps some people have the blessing to be able to just switch jobs easily but not everyone does. Like in my mothers situation she had to find a job that was going to pay her the same or more as she was working because she was just barely getting by & she has serious health issues and every place she looked at had a period of time before you could get insurance there she couldn't give up her insurance where she was.
But I wouldn't just walk in and quit but if it is so stressful and you are able, I would atleast search around for a new job. Keeping your options open atleast.
Exercise is great but diet is more important for losing weight. Maybe just try to focus on diet right now and small fitness goals like taking the stairs, parking alittle farther away? I like to do push ups and squats everytime I go to the bathroom lmao!
I'm sorry you're having such a hard time at work, that sucks.
We have to deal with the stressors of today but also look to fix them long term. Do you see yourself at this job in 5yrs? If not then why not make the step of looking for another one? Just doing that may help you feel more hopeful. In the meantime take some time to nurture yourself daily, as much as you can. That may be exercise, yoga, a spa treatment, a bowl of soup, a phone call with your best friend, or visiting a pet store to cuddle with puppies. I don't know, whatever makes you smile and enjoy your day, something to focus on at the end of the day and look back and say "wow, I really enjoyed my day."
Once you've got a happy positive mindset then weightloss seems more attainable.
If you're regularly and actually experiencing abuse at your job, you should not be there. Correct me if I am wrong but you don't have kids or dependents who rely on your income to feed and house them, right? It's much easier to leave a crappy work situation when you don't have dependents, when it's (still scary, but more doable) possible to be "in between jobs" without being homeless and depending on social services and shelters.
I do think the whole "DO WHAT YOU LOVE/SEEK PASSION/EVERYONE NEEDS TO LOVE THEIR CAREER" idea is unrealistic for a lot of people, but I also hate seeing people "stick it out" at a job they hate for years and years and years when they don't have to. In any event, it can't hurt to spend a few minutes a day looking at other options.
I agree with Krampus- not trying to say just walk out without a new job, but if you are truly miserable and have done everything you can to remedy the situation with the good suggestions posted here, then you may not only want to nurture yourself in some way everyday as wannabeskinny recommends (great advice) but also start looking for something better. You deserve it!
Having spent two years in an absolutely miserable work situation, I can say that starting yourself on a path to either improve where you're currently working or finding a new job could hugely impact your health. Those stressors affect not only the food you eat or the lack of exercise you get but your sleep and so many other things. It just breaks you down over time, in my experience...
Granted, it can be JUST AS STRESSFUL to find a new job. But you only have a few choices here. Somehow learn to accept and find happiness in your current situation or find a new situation. I wish you the best of luck. I know how hard it is. I spent all of my vacation time over those two years on interviews. I got laid off before I could even tell them I quit! But getting laid off from that awful place was the best darn thing to ever happen to me. *hugs* Wishing you the best. This isn't a failure, it's an opportunity.
Dollfaise, you might considering popping by Ask a Manager to check out some of the questions and advice on dealing with difficult work situations.
Thank you so much, I'll check it out.
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Originally Posted by DrivenByAmbition
I don't think that it's krampus 'didn't get it.' She gave sound advice. Why be miserable in a career? I'm not telling you to quit a job before you have another one, but I would definitely be looking.
I just don't like when people make huge things sound small or as if they're new concepts. Of course I've been looking, but as another poster put it, finding work in this economy is difficult. I've even got a friend sending me suggestions through her contacts.
@moonkissed I would like to be transferred so I keep looking for openings but there aren't any. My job isn't actually open often, the reason it opened at all, I later learned, was because the guy before me clocked out one day like normal and didn't return. The other branches have had this position filled with the same person for years.
@Wannabeskinny You're right, I need to find a way to feel better. I felt so terrible this morning that I called out, not caring that they were apparently short staffed today. As I told the district manager, it's this constant abuse that makes people not care and it's the abuse that accounts for their turnover. I cried in bed for a while, absolutely sobbing, and then I thought about my situation - my wants and fears - and I've decided to apply at a few grad schools. I wouldn't be starting until Fall of 2015 if I am accepted but that's my solution and I already feel better inside for mustering up the courage to go for it. Now, whether I'll still be at this job then or not remains to be seen. If I have a serious shot of going, I might stay just to save money because the pay isn't bad. Then, if I started classes I'd go part time somewhere else.
And thanks nonameslob, I know how you felt, my friend had the same problem. We were both actually laid off from the same company at the same time and she said the same thing - that she feels better for it.
Heartbroken over "failure"
I tried going this morning, before work, and it only made me sad. I have a 5k coming up and I can barely jog a mile let alone 3+. My pants almost don't fit.
