I really really really need to get into that mind set! Today I was baking some stuff for my brother, ate a cookie and completely broke my diet.
Ooh, please try not to think of eating a cookie as "completely breaking your diet." Its just a cookie. Go a little easier on yourself. You will find it easier to stick to plan if you don't give off-plan choices that much power.
There is a tendency to think that one off-plan choice blows the whole day, or even the whole weight loss attempt. It's a very destructive way of thinking. Try to make the best choice every time you are faced with a choice - next time you might choose not to eat the cookie - but there's no reason why one less-than-optimal choice should affect the choices you make after that. When you eat a cookie, try to get back on plan with the very next bite of food.
In other words: perfection is not required, only consistency. When you don't have much to lose, you perhaps can't afford to make off-plan choices too frequently, but that still doesn't mean that one off-plan choice sinks your entire effort.
Reading your post, I can't help but feel you need a hug (even if it's only the cyber kind) Gorgeous dress btw.
As a calorie counter I'd say 20ish lbs. by May is definitely doable I am, however, a little worried about your state of mind, no I don't think your crazy in the least, you just seem so very sensitive. When you're secure in yourself, the opinions of others shouldn't matter. I know that when you're feeling low that statement is difficult to swallow, but it's as true as can be. You're a lovely young woman, and you CAN do it.
Ooh, please try not to think of eating a cookie as "completely breaking your diet." Its just a cookie. Go a little easier on yourself. You will find it easier to stick to plan if you don't give off-plan choices that much power.
There is a tendency to think that one off-plan choice blows the whole day, or even the whole weight loss attempt. It's a very destructive way of thinking. Try to make the best choice every time you are faced with a choice - next time you might choose not to eat the cookie - but there's no reason why one less-than-optimal choice should affect the choices you make after that. When you eat a cookie, try to get back on plan with the very next bite of food.
In other words: perfection is not required, only consistency. When you don't have much to lose, you perhaps can't afford to make off-plan choices too frequently, but that still doesn't mean that one off-plan choice sinks your entire effort.
Thanks for the reply Carter
The only reason I try to keep it off limits for me, is because tasting it triggers cravings, and I always give into cravings, when I'm going cold turkey I'm usually less likely to quit. But I def see what you're saying! I do have not give so much power like you mentioned, that's something I really need to change about me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by DLS1
Reading your post, I can't help but feel you need a hug (even if it's only the cyber kind) Gorgeous dress btw.
As a calorie counter I'd say 20ish lbs. by May is definitely doable I am, however, a little worried about your state of mind, no I don't think your crazy in the least, you just seem so very sensitive. When you're secure in yourself, the opinions of others shouldn't matter. I know that when you're feeling low that statement is difficult to swallow, but it's as true as can be. You're a lovely young woman, and you CAN do it.
Aww thanks DLS1!! and thank you. I do love the dress I know, I think it's because I've put on so much weight, and then lost 25lbs ever since the holidays I can't seem to get back on the wagon, but I was 173lbs today!! Not much but I'll take it =)
It's sad that weightloss=confidence but it's been a struggle for me for the longest time, and no one in family is fat, it's just ME. My immediate and extended family, I'm probably the only one over 150 lbs, even the males are all normal weight. We never ate junk food per say, but I always ate a lot of rice or a lot of meat, stuff like that. As I got older I started eating more junk (high school/college) and that's when I really became overweight, so it's just difficult I guess.
But thanks everyone!! I really appreciate the responses! I think for now I'm just going to focus staying on plan!
The only reason I try to keep it off limits for me, is because tasting it triggers cravings, and I always give into cravings, when I'm going cold turkey I'm usually less likely to quit. But I def see what you're saying! I do have not give so much power like you mentioned, that's something I really need to change about me.
I understand completely; I have trigger foods as well, and items I cannot keep in the house because I will finish them off in an hour.
I just wanted to emphasize that knowing you have to stay away from something isn't the same as "completely breaking your diet" when you eat one of it. It may be extremely difficult to stop at that point, but you do still have the power to stop. And even if you don't - even if you scarf down the whole box of cookies - you still haven't completely upended your weight-loss process, you have just had one day off plan.
I am harping on something you already understand because I think it is so important to be mindful of these all-or-nothing mindsets we've had beaten into us. They are so tightly tied to moral judgments about food and eating - "I've been good today," "this dessert is sinful," etc. - that I just think are incredibly destructive and interfere with success.
I understand completely; I have trigger foods as well, and items I cannot keep in the house because I will finish them off in an hour.
I just wanted to emphasize that knowing you have to stay away from something isn't the same as "completely breaking your diet" when you eat one of it. It may be extremely difficult to stop at that point, but you do still have the power to stop. And even if you don't - even if you scarf down the whole box of cookies - you still haven't completely upended your weight-loss process, you have just had one day off plan.
I am harping on something you already understand because I think it is so important to be mindful of these all-or-nothing mindsets we've had beaten into us. They are so tightly tied to moral judgments about food and eating - "I've been good today," "this dessert is sinful," etc. - that I just think are incredibly destructive and interfere with success.
Best of luck.
Yes very true!! So funny that you point that out, because that is how my mind works! I'm always reading to throw away a weeks effort by a cookie, lol. But thanks for responding~!
I wanted to ask you!! I noticed your current weight says 152, have you been calorie counting? I feel like I've been staying in my calorie range of 1200-1400 and have not seen a loss (and this has been for awhile now!) I got down to 173 a few days ago (before I ate that stupid cookie) and I swear no loss since then!! I know I have to be more patient, but is it possible that some people just have to be extra strict? rather than eat whatever as long as it's in their calorie range?
Sorry if that sounds confusing. I just feel like I'm always trying to change my diet because I don't see a loss
I wanted to ask you!! I noticed your current weight says 152, have you been calorie counting? I feel like I've been staying in my calorie range of 1200-1400 and have not seen a loss (and this has been for awhile now!) I got down to 173 a few days ago (before I ate that stupid cookie) and I swear no loss since then!! I know I have to be more patient, but is it possible that some people just have to be extra strict? rather than eat whatever as long as it's in their calorie range?
Sorry if that sounds confusing. I just feel like I'm always trying to change my diet because I don't see a loss
A few different points here.
First, my current weight is actually not quite that low - I am working off a bit of a regain, as it says in my signature. But yes, I calorie-counted all the way down.
Some people do find that weight loss works better if they limit carbs as well as (or instead of) calories. "Works better" can mean "results in faster losses" but it can also mean "results in the same speed of loss but the plan is easier to stick to, cravings are lessened, etc." That is a very individualized thing and there is no way to know unless you try it. Except see below on what it means to "try something."
I never needed to explicitly limit carbs, even to get down to my lowest weight. Calorie counting was enough. One thing that happened to me, though, is that certain kinds of carbs almost became self-limiting, because the calories simply weren't worth it. If I could choose to spend 150 calories on an enormous helping of sauteed vegetables or a demure little half-cup cup of steamed rice, I am going to choose the vegetables nearly every time - because I like eating and I would rather eat the big plate of food. But I never cut carbs explicitly - my regular diet includes a sandwich on wheat bread almost every day, as many as 2-3 servings of fruit, even sometimes popcorn or a bag of pretzels.
Okay. On to patience and time. You said you got down to 173 a few days ago and have seen no loss since then. Well, a few days is simply not a meaningful time scale on which to measure fat loss. If you are lucky and stick to your plan, you will lose fat at the rate of a pound or two a week. But your total body weight depends upon a lot of other things besides how much fat you lost. Fluid retention varies depending upon a whole host of factors, some within your control and some not within your control. And fluid swings can be up to 5 pounds, easily masking a whole MONTH of fat loss. To evaluate whether your plan is working, you have to wait long enough to see your fat-loss pattern emerge from the noise of fluid-weight fluctuations.
So the meaningful time scale to evaluate how well your plan is working is not a few days or a week, but a month or two. I frequently see no loss for as much as three weeks - just bouncing up and down by a pound or two - and then finally get a "whoosh" of a few pounds loss that averages out to about 4 pounds lost per month. But I won't see a cooperative little march downward of a few ounces per day, absolutely not.
So if you are trying to evaluate whether a plan is working for you, I recommend sticking with it for at least a month (preferably two). See how you feel, how easy the plan is to follow, how well it fits your lifestyle, how comfortable you are on it - and how much weight you've lost on that meaningful time scale. Then tweak if you want to but know that it will take a month or two to evaluate the effectiveness of the tweaks!
This requires a lot of patience but there is an upside too - it might help you see how that one cookie or that one off-plan day is not as important as you are making it out to be. You do not need perfection to lose weight - only consistency over the long haul. When I lost 120 pounds I was not on plan every day. But I was on plan most of the time, for a long time. And that was enough.
Gorgeous dress btw.
I am, however, a little worried about your state of mind, no I don't think your crazy in the least, you just seem so very sensitive. When you're secure in yourself, the opinions of others shouldn't matter. I know that when you're feeling low that statement is difficult to swallow, but it's as true as can be. You're a lovely young woman, and you CAN do it.
