This seems crazy, but I feel ashamed to be seen at my new weight (which is heaviest ever).

I was invited out this weekend to a place where a guy used to work (and maybe still does). I'm not interested in him, nor have I ever been, but the last time I saw him he was interested in me and I denied him (nicely).

The last time I saw him I was a size 0-4, and now I'm a size 14. It's not that I think I look terrible right now--but it's that I've gained so much weight since the last time he saw me.

I don't think he would be rude if he saw me, but I just feel this strange urge to avoid the whole thing. It's like I feel ashamed to have gained weight.

I don't even know if he's there anymore, and I never was interested anyway! I worry that isolating myself from social events will just make me more depressed and reliant on food for pleasure, and be counter-productive to losing weight.

Someone please tell me this is ridiculous. Has anyone else felt like this?

Oh honey. I feel like that all the time. The worst thing you can do is stay in though but yet, I've done that for so long. The thing that helps me is to be with family and friends that I know love me no matter what.

Feel better and try not to think too negatively. All I think of when I see someone look at me funny because of my weight or someone I used to know do that I think, "Just wait until you see me after I lose all this weight. Just wait. You'll be eating your hearts out."

yes, do yourself a favor and don't isolate yourself. this is your life now, which doesn't mean you won't lose weight or change your body or anything else. you can spend the time feeling bad about yourself alone in your house, making that move towards weight loss and getting healthy feel like a mountain to climb, or go out and enjoy the company of others, and make your efforts to lose weight and get healthy an added thing you're doing to create a happier life.

I'm sure it wasn't just your body the guy liked, btw.

Definitely not ridiculous to feel that way, but maybe ridiculous to let it control you.

Don't let life pass you by while you wait to get thin. Although I always want to be thinner (sometimes I am, sometimes I'm not), I've never noticed a correlation between my best memories and my weight.

Live the fabulous life you were meant to live - you deserve it.

yep felt like it and feel like it at the moment. im always thinking up ways to avoid seeing people i know or have known when i was a lot smaller..frankly a silly thing to do if they are decent people anyway cause theyd value you on who you are not what you look like, but we all do it!

isnt it hard sometimes!!!

I agree with the other girls. You shouldn't put your life on hold just because your feeling a little down about your weight. I have felt like you have. But I never let it hold me back. Its life and people gain weight. If he liked you, then i'm sure there were other reasons besides your size, and i'm sure your going to have alot of fun catching up.

Life needs to be enjoyed, at any weight. Otherwise you'll look back and have alot of regrets and "What if's."

I agree you should go, but I definitely understand how you feel. I have avoided doing way too many things because I felt embarrassed to be seen in public.

I disagree somewhat - if you don't think you'll be comfortable going then don't go. It's one event, not your whole life!

You should never feel ashamed of yourself and hide away but at the same time I do think if you've decided that you're not going to enjoy yourself for whatever reason then it's perfectly fine to bow out, particularly if the alternative is that you feel self-conscious/uncomfortable in public and come home thinking 'I really should have passed on that'. You've said the guy in question isn't the kind who would be mean to you about your weight the main thing holding you back here is how you feel about it.

If it's a once off thing missing the event isn't the end of the world, but be careful it doesn't become a habit It's not at all ridiculous to feel the way you do but you can't let it control everything either.

I totally feel your pain. I left my last job about 40 lbs lighter and dread anytime I may run into anyone from there. Although, it doesn't stop me from living my life or getting out of the house, I do try to avoid any situation (FOR NOW) that may make me really uncomfortable (ie embarrassed). It may not be completely healthy, but it's the truth and just the way I feel. I take some comfort in knowing I will eventually look better than I did before and will look forward to 'running' into anyone So, you should too!