I forgot to tell you about the final thing that set me off last night. I went to the grocery store. I have always liked grocery shopping and looking at the new stuff available. I was walking down each isle and looking at everything, trying to feel better about things. I finished my shopping and went to check out. The lady running the register asked me if I want to sample this healthy, blah, blah, blah cookie? WHAT?! You actually have the freakin' nerve to ask me if I want a freakin' cookie? So, me and my pity party self told her "no, thank you, I can't have that". I guess I was mumbling because I don't think she heard me. She said "I'm sorry that you are having a bad day". I told her "no, I'm not having a bad day. I have a food allergy and I can't have a cookie. In fact, yes I am actually having a bad day over my food allergy". She said "I am so sorry that you have to deal with that".
I hurried up and got out of there before I freaked out on someone who was trying to be nice to me. Once I got in my car, I realized that I had been in the store for 1 1/2 hours. I don't normally feel sorry for myself or have a pity party. I am so used to doing whatever it takes to fix the problem. Yesterday I was like a big pimple getting ready to erupt! Hopefully I am done with that for a while.
@Diana3271 - I know that I am new at this but I do the same thing you do. Go thru the grocery store, when the kids are at school, and just look at stuff. Then I end up buying stuff for me that is fatty, and that I don't need, and not letting the kids have any. Yes this makes me feel good (MY FOOD).
Hopefully I can fix this (my problem)... I happened to see Dr Oz yesterday and saw the Stella Family. They (4 family members) lost 500 pounds by changing the way they eat and shop. They suggest only shop on the outside aisles, that is where the freshest food is. www .stellastyle. com (spaces because I haven't made 25 posts yet and can't add a url, sorry)
I hope this can help you too. I am going shopping tomorrow after church, with my kids, and I am shopping the outside aisle! I will let you know how that works for me.
Well today my weight is 175.8 - most would think "hey you lost 2 pounds". Not really, I fluxuate between 174 and 178 all the time.
1ladiesjournal you know, I had just been told about the outside aisles of the grocery store and the last two times I wass there I took note of my shopping. Of the last two trips, everything was from the perimeter. I hadn't realized that of my shopping. Now, I can't always go down the perimeter, but even when I go down the aisles, it's to buy pasta, rice, flour/baking supplies and once in awhile, whole grain cereal.
We eat only fresh veggies and fresh meat (not from the frozen aisle) and then things like eggs and milk. However, what else is on the perimeter? Donuts! I don't buy those though!
Not good at keeping up with calorie counting since I've moved countries. Without my meal replacement bars, I am nothing. I've been fitting in gym last week though, but then pulled my ankle the other day and had to rest a bit.
I'm disappointed in myself because I feel that by now, I should have lost the pouch that is my stomach, by now, I could be 10-15 lbs lighter and closer to my goal...but also, I am angry that I can't just eat and live normally like people who weigh less than me and not have to worry that my entire wardrobe might not fit in a month or so.
I hope to find it in me to continue, because if I don't, I know I'll just climb back up to my 180 lbs that seem to be the highest my body lets me gain...the weight where I feel lethargic, unhappy, and still trying to convince myself that I am 'thin'.
I think it was the holidays...and the travel, and everything.I can't say I've binged but I've definitely eaten things that should have set off red flags. Today I bought a chocolate bar. Bad, bad, bad.
Tomorrow is another day! I just wish I knew how to start up again before I gain any weight.
Breakfast (365 Calories + coffee)
spritz oil in pan
egg 70 cal
egg whites from carton 60 calories
Vegetable of choice
1/8 cup feta cheese 40 calories
high fiber English muffin 100 calories
1 teaspoon jam 20 calories
juice 75 calories
coffee w/sugar and cream
Lunch (405 calories)
Grilled Mahi 135 Calories
Greek Yogurt to make dill sauce and ate balance of yogurt 100 calories
1 package Steamed California blend veggies (carrots, broccoli, cauliflower)
120 calories
Iced coffee w/cream + sweet 'n low 50 calories
Breakfast
2 c. Coffee 8
2 Scoops Big train Mocha 180
2 squirts Tiramisu Syrup (ohhhh yeah … I am soooo bad ) 40
2 slices Cinnamon Rasin bread 160
4 Eggs 280
1/4c Veg 35
2 oz Ham 133 ( Finally got to read the nutrient label on this brand of ham way more calories then I thought 170 for 3 oz)
Sub Total 836
Lunch
So did not happen today
Dinner( finally got it at 11:30 pm)
1c Healthy Colors ( the one with cranberries) 70
TGI Friday's Complete Skillet Meals Loaded Potato Skillet With Chicken 230
2 slices of tangerine ( leftover from pip eating) 10
1c Dark Chocolate Almond Milk 120( Not bad tasting)
Sub Total 430
Daily Total 1266
Water 60
I feel like a lil old woman today UGH in general my body hurts everywhere but certain spots really are blisteringly painful… my dd totally thrashed my leg…. I had my feet on her little wooden chair and she ( all 50 lbs of her .. Ok ok ok 49.2lbs she had to weigh herself this morning) jumped from my other thigh where she was standing on my knee of my other leg with her knees. Can we say OUCHIE!!! So today I have one heck of a bruise on my ankle where it smashed into the corner of the chair when she landed. My knee doesn’t hurt , but my back on that side feels like it is in a knot all the way along my spine from half way down my ribcage and over to the side and down to my waist. I showed my dd the bruise on my ankle and told her that is why we do not jump on mommy. My mom was sure I had screwed up my knee because she said it bent crazy, but so far no pain there just everywhere else.
Plus side this morning I was putting on some cocoa butter all over ( trying to keep the skin moisturized.. Don‘t want to look like the saggy baggy elephant) and dd was imitating and run out of places to put lotion and had way to much on her hands still…. Asked if she would like to put some on my back. She was all excited to put lotion on my back. I spent 30 minutes getting half a jar of cocoa butter rubbed( at that point I didn’t care how much she used *lol*) into my back ….ahhhhhh oh yeah. I was sooo sticky after but oh well *LOL* DD then got lotion on her back while she imitated me going ohh ahhh *lol*
I spent 3 hours at the grocery store .. ( bangs my head .. Yeah you read it right 3) came home and opened the fridge and closed it *lol*… then scooted the trashcan over and commenced to throw out .. Uhhh basically most of the stuff in the fridge out. Mom had promised over Christmas to clean it out since she was off. I knew it hadn’t happened. Why hadn’t I done it before I went to the store … uhhhh hope that somehow it would clean itself *lol* Anyway 2 hours later (various interruptions from dd ) I finally got the fridge cleaned out. When I say clean I mean I even went through mom’s cheeses and condiments( which is no touching allowed zone ) *lol* …I swear I could hear that little woman from poltergeist Tangina saying, “This ..[fridge].. is clean.” I put away the groceries and finally got my dinner at 11:30 .. This adventure started at almost 5:30 with me going to the grocery store that is 10 minutes away. It has been a long day. And obviously I am sleepy while writing this because I am rambling on and most likely not making any sort of since. Yes Yes well good night everyone .. Good eating and healthy living tomorrow for all of us yes!?!
Breakfast
2 Regular Pumpkin Muffins Version 2 *lol* 278
2 oz 50/50 Greek Yogurt and Cream Cheese 118
Sub Total 396
Lunch
So did not happen today
Dinner
2 mini Quiche ( Ham & Cheese ) 536
4 Pierogi 213
1/4c Greek Sour Cream 78
2 Reg Pumpkin Muffins V2 278
Sub Total 1105
Daily Total 1501
Water 60 w/ lemon
Still feeling like crud..I slept a good portion of the day.. now the muscles at the base of my thumbs hurt... there has been a cold/flu/virus whatever running around this area that makes your muscles hurt. It doesn't make you the traditional sick with the sniffles, this feels like certain muscles have ben strained and have tendonitis at the same time and the weak ired feeling of the flu everywhere else. No fever or anything though. So strange.
She said "I'm sorry that you are having a bad day". 
I told her "no, I'm not having a bad day. I have a food allergy and I can't have a cookie. In fact, yes I am actually having a bad day over my food allergy". She said "I am so sorry that you have to deal with that". 
Once I got in my car, I realized that I had been in the store for 1 1/2 hours. 
I don't normally feel sorry for myself or have a pity party. I am so used to doing whatever it takes to fix the problem. Yesterday I was like a big pimple getting ready to erupt! 
