When I was out for my daily walk on Monday, I dropped in at our local pharmacy to pick up a prescription. While there, I bumped into my aunt, who's a cashier there. The first thing she said was, "Well, you're still losing weight, I see." I made a comment along the lines of, "Yep, still got a little ways more to go" (I actually still have thirty pounds to go before I reach my goal weight.)
And she says, "Well, be careful. You might not want to lose much more -- it's starting to show in your face. You're looking a bit haggard."
....Pardon me?
I have been on my weight loss journey for nearly ten months, and I can honestly say that this is the very first time anyone has said anything even remotely negative about how I look. I'd love to say that her comment didn't upset me, but it did. I'd love to have been able to come back at her with something snarky, but as it was, all I could manage was "Well, that's odd. I've been losing weight for nearly a year and you're the very first person who's said anything negative to me. Everyone else is amazed at how I'm managing to lose without losing my skin's elasticity."
When I got home, I immediately studied my face in the mirror and realized...she's full of ****. I am thirty-one years old, for God's sake. OK, fine, maybe I don't have the skin I had when I was twenty, but I certainly don't look "haggard" (what a lovely word, eh?) I think I look pretty damn good.
And then I realized...if a hundred people have told me how amazing I look, and *one* person has told me I'm starting to look old, who should I believe?
But I have to admit that it really did upset me at first, because looking old or "haggard" is something I've worked really hard to avoid. It's why I'm trying to lose the weight slowly, you know? And it really kind of undermined my confidence to hear that.
My mother, God love her, immediately came to the conclusion that it was pure jealousy talking and that I shouldn't pay one bit of attention to people like that. She's right (on both counts, I'm pretty sure) but...like, why are people like that? It's beyond me. You'd think she'd be happy that I'm not a friggin' walking timebomb anymore!
I am beginning to wonder if these people really know what the word haggard means?, "looking exhausted and unwell,esp from fatique,worry,or suffering" This to mean a person would really look real sick. These people are just jealous as they in their own life are not accomplishing as much as you are doing. Keep up the good work and let those nasty comments fly off your back and not into your heArt and head. I live with a very jealous daughter in law(ex). She started me into the MRC program and she stopped. I kept going and am still going.
I have to say.... those kind of back-handed insults are exactly why I feel no remorse whatsoever in retaliating with "Well, ****you very much" - with a full-face smile, of course, you know, to convey that complete snarky effect. and then I snap my fingers in their face & STRUT AWAY!!!
I have to say.... those kind of back-handed insults are exactly why I feel no remorse whatsoever in retaliating with "Well, ****you very much" - with a full-face smile, of course, you know, to convey that complete snarky effect. and then I snap my fingers in their face & STRUT AWAY!!!
Oh my, I wish I had the guts to say that to some people. Seriously.
Snoofie, it's pure jealousy as everyone else has said. No other reason for it, like you said lots of other people have said how amazing you look, focus on those lovely (and true) comments!
No idea why some people have to make a horrible comment though. Does it make them feel better? Are they just to stupid to know their comment was awful? It's so weird.
haggard
