I don't tend to tell too many people at all - those who "need" to know - like my hubs. Otherwise I tend to play it pretty close to the vest.
I guess I'm afraid if people know they'll be judgmental and watching for me to fail. I'd rather my failures be private...which probably tells you about my dieting experience.
What's funny is that we think it can be private. Unless we are talking about only needing to lose 10-20 pounds, it's pretty obvious if we are doing something. Even with 10-20 pounds, especially with adding in fitness, it's noticeable - especially to observant people.
We go about pretending that it's our own private battle/affair, but we wear our weight publicly. And our gains and losses are very public too - Just look at Oprah and Kirstie Alley - they weren't able to hide, why do we think we are any different?
It depends. People who come up to me and say "Wow, you are losing weight!" I always say "Aww thanks! I've been trying!" and then that opens a discussion of how, etc... I don't go out of my way of telling anyone I'm working to lose weight beyond my boyfriend. I do tell people regularly that I'm going to the gym, or whatever - but going to the gym everyday is a pretty normal thing around here.
I told absolutely no one that I was dieting, not even my husband. When it became obvious that I had lost weight and people started asking about it, then I was willing to tell them what I had been doing.
For me, it was a private matter, and no one's business but mine!
March 4th, 2008 I did not stand up in front of my church congregation or the PTA and announce..."Hey folks, this fat chick is on a diet!". But even at the beginning I found it important to talk about it to some people. Mostly because I didn't want to offend well meaning people who would offer food, and to relieve some of the fears for those who love me and were beginning to really worry about my health. I just plugged quitely along mostly.
No one even noticed any weight loss until I lost around 60 pounds and if they asked, I was completely honest. Shucks, half of my problem with my obesity was honesty with myself...I might as well jump over that hurdle. Later there were the people who though I was ill, or the people who were sure I had weight-loss surgery, or the ones who though I must be using illegal drugs or whatever they thought. I continue to be honest and open to whomever asks, but still to this day, (except on 3FC) do not publicly talk about my weight-loss unless it's a very close friend or family member, or I am asked. But hey, after 190 pounds many people don't even recognize me anymore so it's moot point anyway!
I was very private about it in the beginning. Only one who knew was DH and that was because I ordered differently at the Applebee's one night for dinner. I didn't tell people because
1. Didn't want the "food police"
2. What if I failed? Didn't want to do that publicly
My mom noticed first. Maybe once I had dropped about 25 pounds or so. Others I have seen noticed, but didn't say anything, I think, for fear of offending me. Most tell it to my husband (who himself is down 35lbs, and now at a 26BMI) instead of me.
Now that I have lost 80 lbs +, EVERYONE says something, cause it is obvious and my weight loss looks drastic. Especially for family members who haven't seen me at this weight since I was pubescent, LOL!
My husband knows of course. I got lucky having a mom that's supportive and always positive about losing weight so I talk to her about it.
My close friends and family know I've gotten back on the weight loss journey and could see the difference when I was home visiting a few months ago. It's kind of a positive to live so far away from everyone and not see them often. I don't get a bunch of unwanted advice or input the way I used to get when I lived in the same city.
I don't really talk to anyone else about it. I chat with a couple moms while we're waiting for the kids at the bus stop and they often advertise that they're trying to lose weight. One of them was super talkative about it last year and she actually was telling us how she's back on a plan and down 3lbs in 5 days just yesterday. I've noticed them eying me lately so if they ask then I'll say something, but I'm not going to just make it public. I always feel like then there is an expectation once people know, and I don't want that pressure at all.
I'm not trying to hide the fact that I am dieting, I just don't care to have the unsolicited advice and comments. Eventually people will notice and say something. When asked if I have lost weight I just say,"Yes and I did on purpose" When asked how much I give a noncommital answer such as "Oh, some or a little".
Shame had a lot to do with why I started trying to lose weight "in private." I was ashamed that I had gotten to where I was and was ashamed that I needed to "go on a diet". Looking back, things would have probably been a lot easier had I been more open about it, especially since I was living at home and was eating someone else's cooking at the time. I honestly didn't know how to ask for the support.
I still don't feel like it's relevant to talk a lot about my weight loss, but people can obviously tell that I look a lot different and that my habits have definitely changed. My family is more of the sweep-it-under-the-rug types who would rather pretend like issues don't exist, so no one really says much about the weight loss.
Mine is similar to Bargoo. My husband and kids knew since we share a roof... and my mom knew because she was trying also and we both have medical issues that are obstacles (so two heads are better than one for solutions)... My 2 good friends knew and that's it. People have really taken notice at work now though and ask "are you losing weight? You look like you really are".... I say yes... but when asked how much, just reply with "not enough, I will celebrate when I get where I want"... had one lady not impressed that after asking me multiple times I still wouldn't tell her. It's not that I am trying to be rude... it's that most of these people have nothing to do with me outside of work...this to me, is a very personal thing... I wouldn't expect them to tell me personal private matters that take place in their home if they weren't comfortable... but... I am on here, and on MFP and that truly is a good thing. I share more than I shut up and to me, that's kind of public, but public to people who are not judging your outside, your history, your "expected" results... it's support, plain and simple.
Only my family knew. At work, I started skinny, so my co-workers saw my "evolution" to fat. They are all polite, so of course, no one said anything about it, even though the topic of diet and weight loss was part of our regular conversation when I was thin. I was the elephant in the room, so to speak ! Now that I'm losing, I figured I would let them introduce the subject if they wished, but I didn't feel comfortable doing so. A few of my closer co-workers have commented on my weight loss, though, and have been supportive and complimentary, so I've told them "I'm trying!" and leaving it at that.
I don't carry a sign that says "I'm dieting" but I do like talking about my food and weight loss interests, so it does sometimes come up, even in casual conversations with strangers.
I'm extremely confident in my choices though, so food police, food commentary, and even outright criticism do not bother me. I can defend my food choices (if I wish to) just as easily as my choices in movies, books, and hobbies. My life, my choices, and I don't mind telling folks why I choose what I do (and even what I think they should choose if they want to hear it).
I think we're open to advice and criticism on many topics in our lives, and if we disagree we don't take it as personally as we do with weight loss and diet.
It just seems that diet and fitness are so outrageously taboo compared to other topics. It often seems less taboo to tell people how they should raise their kids, than it is to share our beliefs on diet, fitness, and wellness.
I have told a few coworkers who are also trying to lose weight so we share advice. I have also told my boyfriend & mom and dad.
Last Christmas I mistakenly emailed my whole family when I didnt mean to so everyone found out I was trying to lose weight which isn't a big deal but at Christmas when we were all together I had ANNOYING aunts saying "are you sure you should be eating that?" in reference to a couple potato chips - I flipped out ...... eeek .... but the rudest thing I can imagine is food police from someone who doesnt need to know your business and doesn't know your plan. I wouldnt tell ANYONE you think might annoy you about it or start judging your choices, you will regret it!
