[MoveMoveMove]

Originally Posted by PisceanGirl

That was when I realized that I had to start caring about myself if I was ever going to lose that weight, so I started caring more about what I wore and how I fixed my hair and all that. It actually helped me...OK so start doing that again - you know from experience that it's a strategy that works for you. Then find a few more strategies that you can use.

I tried doing that, just so someone would notice, but I couldn't do it because I'm too afraid of pain. Because I don't cut myself... I entertained thoughts of cutting about a year ago. It started out as digging my nails into my arms and legs but never got further than that (I don't handle pain well at all). For me it moved the pain from the emotional to the physical and "helped" in a way to ease the pain. But that is just as abusive to me as the food addiction so I stopped before it could escalate.

Sometimes I try to read inspirational stories. I idolize Queen Latifah. But it never helps me... I could never be as beautiful as Queen Latifah, and I don't even have half of her confidence... Don't idolize anyone. Respect and admire ok, but no idolizing. And guess what, QL's confidence came from her working thru her own issues. See if you can find some of the stories and interviews about her that touch on some of her struggles. Everybody has their challenges, including QL.

Because I'm big, and because I'm so tall, nobody has every really thought of me as a sensitive or shy person. All through school, I was seen as snobby or aloof when I was really just shy. In fact, people are always saying that I look a lot older than I am. When I was sixteen, I had people asking me if I was a teacher and if I had kids... Someone even thought my 10-year-old sister was my daughter... Me too. The phrase I always got was "You look like you should be someone's mother."

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Originally Posted by PisceanGirl

Thank you all so much!!!! I'm going to stop pitying myself and start counting my blessings. There might be someone on this forum that needs real help and advice, and here I am caught up in my own self-made drama... I'm ashamed of the way I was thinking, but I'm glad I learned that lesson. Thank you for caring, and helping me to care!

Guess what , YOU need real help and advice; we all do. You have nothing to be ashamed about. Remember, WE ALL HAVE OUR CHALLENGES. Your's are no more or less important than anyone else's. And if you read a response to your post that makes you feel ashamed or any emotion like that, remember that probably was not the poster's intention (even when things get heated in a thread as they sometimes do). And always keep in mind to take what you like and leave the rest.

If you read around the site you'll see many posts that were written as rants, vents, and "need to get this of my chest." That's why 3FC is here. Support in many forms.

Everytime you look in the mirror, say something nice or positive to yourself. It can help in how you feel about yourself.

"Nothing more beautiful than knowing your worth" - Fantasia (I'm Doin Me)<----Listen to this song sometime.

[Lovely]

There's no need to feel ashamed. You needed to vent. You needed to process a few things. You needed a new view.

Everyone does from time to time! I'm glad to hear that you're feeling a little better.

You can do this!