[Eliana]

This paragraph stuck out for me from the article Paris posted. (Thanks for posting it, by the way. )

And who can blame them? Reality shows, weight loss books, movies, TV shows and advertisements all tell tales of people dropping major poundage and gaining seemingly perfect lives. They find their true selves and their true loves. They go back to school or get promotions. They become social butterflies, the life of the party.

I suppose if people are looking for their true selves and/or true loves or are looking for a better job or to go back to school or who WANT to be the life of the party...those people are going to be disappointed. Weight loss is not a cure for those kinds of ailments. I think those of us who are already genuinely satisfied with life outside of obesity will be pleasantly pleased with weight loss, and yes, happier. But I have no aspirations outside of fitting into any and all chairs and booths, walking up to my kids' school without being winded, rolling over in bed without pain, etc., etc.

Weight loss has definitely made me a happier person, but I was already satisfied with all other aspects of my life. It was just hard to see through the fat.

[paris81]

I'm glad that you highlighted the part about reality tv--when watching the Biggest Loser, it makes me crazy to see all the contestants talking about how they are so miserable because of their weight. I guess that's what it takes to get on the show.

I never felt that way. I love my life, and being overweight hasn't held me back. I'm working to get a PhD, and I've lived in Europe for extended periods of time. Some overweight people might not do these things because of their size, but I'm not one of them. It makes me crazy that these reality shows always portray the obese as a group of pathetic, miserable, sociallly incompetant individuals who can be "whole" and "happy" if only they would lose weight.

[arethachick]

Don't believe a word of it! You don't have to be anybody else to be happy. Not even your fit self.

[swtbttrfly23]

Originally Posted by paris81

I never felt that way. I love my life, and being overweight hasn't held me back. I'm working to get a PhD, and I've lived in Europe for extended periods of time. Some overweight people might not do these things because of their size, but I'm not one of them. It makes me crazy that these reality shows always portray the obese as a group of pathetic, miserable, sociallly incompetant individuals who can be "whole" and "happy" if only they would lose weight.

I totally agree, when I was growing up I didn't let my weight affect me like that. I've done some amazing things and been some amazing places and there is no way I would change that just to be thinner. I've always been a real force of nature, and I approach life with the otmost excitement! Not only that, I have always had friends, always been popular. I can make a room full of people burst into laughter, I can charm even the most grumpy soul, and I've never been at a loss for male admirers.

That said, it wasn't until my last couple of years of college that I realized there is a disconnect when it comes to other people. Sure, I've never let my weight hold me back, but it definitely made other people hold back sometimes. I get what this woman is saying. I can always control my view and response to a situation or event, but I can never control the way other people feel. And sad to say, most people just don't treat overweight people that nice, even if they fundamentally like them. My biggest slap in the face came with regard to romance and my career! And I think that is where my weight is affecting me most. Not because I'm any less attractive or smart or experienced, but because there is a 'glaring flaw', the weight. It's not something hidden, or a skeleton in my closet, it's right there every day, and people have to face it. And a lot of people won't face it and give me the benefit of the doubt.