The last time I lost a significant amount of weight (over 80 pounds), I did so by heavily restricting my calorie intact with vegetables, salad, grilled chicken, unappetizing low-calorie frozen entrees, etc. Foods that I really wasn't enjoying. I was also going for walks/runs seven days a week and pushing myself with weight lifting three to four days a week on top of it. I burned myself out. I enjoyed being thinner but I didn't enjoy my life.
I'm embarrassed to say that I've held that experience as an excuse for many years to not lose weight, because I never want to live my life like that again. But the truth that I didn't want to accept is that I don't have to live my life like I did to get rid of weight and keep it off.
Some of my self-held myths I'm blowing this time around:
1.) I have to exercise hard and every single day to lose weight. (I've lost 14 pounds so far without lifting a weight or climbing on a machine.)
2.) Low calorie food is unappetizing. (I've been doing a lot of experimenting with ingredient swaps, using less fat, and more spices to make low calorie flavorful food.)
3.) I'm always going to be fat. ( I got fat and stayed fat by consuming too much of the wrong type of food.)
4.) My "slow metabolism" and PCOS make it too difficult for me to lose weight. (I'm chalking this up to pure hooey.)
Here are my new mantras and beliefs:
1.) I can find ways to move my body that bring me joy!
2.) Low calorie, healthy food can be absolutely delicious!
3.) I don't have to be overweight and the power is in my hands to change it!
4.) I can do this and I won't let anything stand in my way including myself!
What myths or excuses have you had to battle or are you struggling with? What new truths and beliefs are you embracing on this journey?
1. It's too hard (it's only as hard as you make it)
2. I can't lose weight anyway, so why even try (not true, I've lost weight bunches of times)
3. I am happy with myself the way I am (never was, but was a good liar)
and one of the more recent ones. . .
4. I'm going to have loose skin hanging all over me, I'll look horrible and never be happy. Better to have the fat filling up the skin.
I'm sure there are 100's more, but those stick out in my mind. Very hard to shut that inner voice up.
Wow! You are really in a wonderful frame of mind!!
Here's mine:
1.) This will take FOR-EV-AH so why bother
2.) If I miss a day of exercise I will gain back all my weight
3.) I'm 34, have to many kids and hubby loves me anyway...why bother
I, too, am an all or nothing person. I am actually on a "rest week" because I burned myself down to nothingness last week and had to spend Sunday comatose. This has to be sustainable in a lifetime sort of way. If I can't keep this up (whether it's the food that's a problem or the exercise) then it won't work in the long haul.
This will take a while, but not forever. I love the show Biggest Loser, but think that it sets my expectations to high. They have all day every day to do nothing but work out. For most of us, after work, housework, meals, bathing/helping/etc kids, we might get an hour to workout before bed.
So, while I may not loose 5 or 6lbs a week, I will get there!
Here are my new mantras and beliefs:
1.) I can find ways to move my body that bring me joy!
2.) Low calorie, healthy food can be absolutely delicious!
3.) I don't have to be overweight and the power is in my hands to change it!
4.) I can do this and I won't let anything stand in my way including myself!
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Love it. Love it. LOVE IT!!!
I knew for me in order to succeed at this, long term, permanently that is, that a huge key to that success would be to discover healthy, lower calorie foods that taste DELICIOUS.
I was willing to give up a lot of foods in order to get healthy - but eating boring, bland, tasteless food was simply NOT an option (or being hungry). There was no way in **** I was going to stick with this if I wasn't loving everything that I was eating.
"People all over the world are starving. People all through history have been starving. How could you possibly turn down the wealth you've got? You're one of the lucky few who could stuff herself every day if she wanted to -- it's practically your duty to do it!"
Which makes absolutely NO sense. Me eating too much food isn't going to do a THING about starving people -- it'll just jeopardize my health. But that's what I say to myself...
The lie: I just couldn't fail again and put on even more weight this time around.
Now, it's true everytime I failed, I regained the original weight + some. But, now I realize I don't have to fail. I have to make permanent sustainable changes. If something stalls me, I can take time to maintain. I don't have to go back to my old ways. I can figure out something new that works better. If I slip up (and I have) it doesn't mean giving up. It means figuring out why, how to not make those mistakes again and moving forward.
I don't have to make myself miserable. I can find healthy choices that are filling and tasty. I don't have to eat to make others happy or to be accepted. I can and do find ways to burn the calories that are fun for me. It's okay to make time for me. I don't have to do it perfectly, I just need to do it!
Whew! That felt good to write all of that out! It's something I've been processing for the last month or so. I doubt very much it will be the last time I have to reprogram my brain, so this was good practice!
Oh boy, did I have a ton of these. Sometimes it's still hard to force myself out of that way of thinking. I used to think -
- I love food too much to lower my calories. It's impossible to eat healthier and feel satisfied.
- Reduced fat cheese sucks (cheese is my favorite food) and I'd rather have full-fat or nothing (of course I always just went with full-fat).
- I have to stick to a very strict, rigid workout plan or I won't be able to keep it up
Soo, I'm trying to change these ways of thinking -
- I absolutely CAN reduce my calorie intake and still not feel like I'm starving (meal deliveries helped me with this - I knew it was enough food, I just had to learn how to space it out)
- reduced fat cheese isn't that bad, once you get used to it (applied this to other food items as well such as cream cheese) and if I get stronger flavored cheese like pepper jack, I can eat less of it and still be happy
- new exercise mantra - DO WHAT YOU CAN. I was trying to stick to a very rigid workout and it wasn't working. I would wake up and my workout would just feel too daunting, so I wouldn't do it at all. Now I just have to do what I think I can do that day. It may not be the most calorie-burning workout ever, but the point is I'm doing SOMETHING. This is starting to work amazingly well for me. Ironically, the reverse is true for my diet - I can't really allow wiggle room or I go nuts, but if I have a strict plan (strict in that each meal/snack is planned out in advance, not terribly strict calorie-wise) I can stick to it and feel full and satisfied.
It's actually sort of fun tweaking things and finding out what works for me and what doesn't.
My biggest myth was "yes, I know I'm fat but at least I maintain my weight." Um, no, putting on over 10 lbs a year for the past few years is NOT maintaining. Number two was that if I'm on a diet, I have to be perfect and if I go off plan, then why bother, so just go ahead and eat whatever you want.
My biggest change is that I am NOT on a diet, so I can't fall off one. I have made a commitment to myself to lead a healthy life, and that includes eating reasonable portions of healthy food that I love. Right now, that helps me lose weight, and eventually, it will be the lifestyle that helps me maintain that loss.
MY CURRENT PERSONAL EXCUSES
1. it takes a lot of work to plan low calorie meals, and I'm tired; I'll just a) agree to order take out or b) agree to whatever (normal weight) bf wants to eat since he's cooking (no matter how it fits into my eating plan)
TRUTH: it really doesn't take much energy or effort at all to sit and think out a handful of meals for the week that fit my plan
2. I'm tired, so I deserve to indulge myself with whatever food I feel like eating
TRUTH: if I'm tired, I can REST, and there are many other ways I can indulge myself that don't require food.
3. I'm tired, so it's ok to wait to get back into a gym routine
TRUTH: I'm not too tired to go to the gym, I just THINK I'm too tired to go to the gym
Quote:
1. It's too hard (it's only as hard as you make it)
2. I can't lose weight anyway, so why even try (not true, I've lost weight bunches of times)
3. I am happy with myself the way I am (never was, but was a good liar)
There have been so many things said that I relate to.
Lies I've told myself:
1. You've been overweight you whole life... your body is just meant to be this way.
2. I really don't eat that much. ( A blatant lie. I was a closet binger who didn't like to eat in front of people that I felt would judge me. )
3. I have stretch marks. What's the point of losing the weight if you still won't want to take off your clothes?
New Mantras:
1. If I eat right and exercise, I WILL reach my healthy weight.
2. Just because it's who you've been in the past, doesn't mean it's who you have to be now. (This one goes WAY beyond weight loss).
3. Life will be better healthier. There are so many things that are more fun and comfortable, because I'm not carrying the excess weight.
Thank you all so much for sharing! There are so many other "myths" that people have mentioned that are true for me as well. It is hard to change habits and mindset when we have been living with them for years, but it is possible and we can do it!
My main beef is not with losing weight in general but with working out - something one can read here quite often: I DON'T WANT TO BULK UP.
If only women realized that it takes a LOT of effort and serious amount of weight to develop decent muscles they would stop with that nonsense.
Sorry, I just had to vent.
Biggest Excuses:
1. I'm fat and can't do it so why even try.
2. Its hard to exercise all the time.
3. To lose weight you have to eat awful food.
Truths
1. I'm not happy when I'm heavy and feel a million times better when I put an effort into myself.
2. Exercising isn't hard. Its just about perseverance.
3. I just plan my meals for a week and actually eat what the rest of my family has. Just in smaller portions. I even have a treat every day that I save a few extra points for.
1. I'm ugly anyway so why bother?
2. I can't afford nice clothes anyway so why bother?
3. I simply can not deal with the stress in my life without eating.
The truth:
1. I deserve my good health whether I look like a swimsuit model or not!
2. I deserve my good health whether I can afford nice cloths or not! Plus the Goodwill store has really nice items in smaller sizes.
3. There are many other ways to deal with stress besides eating and I will try each and every one of them until I find what works best for me.
4. I will be a better mother if I have my eating under control. I will set a better example for my kids.
Personal myths & excuses to not lose weight?
