[MoveMoveMove]

Originally Posted by beginme

Thanks for the support and replies so far. I guess, when I get down to it, there are a couple of things holding me back:

1. I want the food more than I want to be thin
2. My body is already be ruined from being this fat. I can't afford plastic surgery, so I will look like one giant deflated balloon. Not inspiring.

I do wish I had love in my life and realize that I could more easily find it thinner. But, then, I think who will want me with a deflated balloon body?

As to wanting the food more, I really can't explain it. It is like a compulsion almost. I want the food more than I want anything. That is why I can't seem to stick to a new food plan for more than a few days. My plan is perfectly reasonable (1800 calories), but I want the pizza. I want the ice cream, etc.

Does that ever stop? Does it ever get easier?

Beginme,

I could have written that post. It even looks like we signed up here around the same time. And I'm still, mostly, where I was then in weight and mental attitude.

But we can do this. I'm not too worried about the saggy body - everything is sagging already anyway. But my saggy stomach will not be as heavy when I've lost the weight (AND WE WILL LOSE THIS WEIGHT). There's a book call The Gabriel Method and if I remember correctly, he said his skin tightened up for him when he lost his weight and he didn't need plastic surgery.

I'm starting with small steps. Everyday, I look in my mirror and say "I love you" then I do 10-20 toe tap jacks. I've been so sedentary, that's about all I can handle so far. I'm also starting to cook again. Used to be I ate 2 of my 3 meals in my truck and dinner was more fast food picked up on the way home. Since I started cooking (and I include heating up frozen dinners as cooking ) the thought of some of the fast food I used to live on gags me. I'm not where I want to be but I'm not where I was just a couple of months ago.

Start with big steps or small steps - that's up to you - but you have to start if you want to finish.

I'm also reading books that come highly recommended by other members. A little bit every day. My work schedule is going to be really crappy until probably mid-March (thanks to my other habit of procrastinating) but there are little things I can work on until then, when I plan to really start working on improving my health.

Join us on the 21 day challenge thread if you want to take some small steps.

I like to find members that have met their goal and go back and read their old posts (you can search for threads started by a particular member). You see some of the struggles they had along the way and knowing that they overcame them is encouraging.

[badpun]

Recently I've been more healthy about food than I ever have before in my life, and I've found that a large change has become how I view the food itself. Rather than being a demonic substance that, if eaten, will make you gain 10 pounds, or being a friend to whom I turn when I'm lonely or sad, I'm starting to think of it without attaching any emotional value. That way, if I want food but know I should hold off until dinner, I won't feel deprived and therefore, less likely to give in to temptation.

[beginme]

Thanks everyone! Just coming back to this board makes me feel a little better.

MoveMoveMove, what books are you reading? I'm an avid reader and would love to read something that might help w/all this.

[MoveMoveMove]

Last night I started reading Small Changes Big Results by Ellie Krieger. It is a 12 week plan of small changes to make, using her 3 prong approach. The three prongs are eating well, moving well, and living well (spirit).

This may not be the order I read them in but I also have:

• The Beck Diet Solution by Judith Beck
• Stop The Insantiy by Susan Powter
• The Ultimate Weight Solution by Dr. Phil
• The Thin Commandments by Stephen Gullo
• Thin for Life by Anne Fletcher
• South Beach Diet
• The Rotation Diet by Martin Katahn
• Eat To Live by Joel Fuhrman

I have others but I can't remember the names right now. Alot of these I bought because they were recommended by many members on this sight. I go to Half Price Books at least once a month and I usually find something in the weight loss section to buy, be it cookbooks or weight loss plans.

[MoveMoveMove]

I got this link for a book list from Sandi, a moderator of the 100 lb club

http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/main...ook-lists.html

Thanks Sandi.

[tryinghardtolose]

Originally Posted by beginme

Thanks for the support and replies so far. I guess, when I get down to it, there are a couple of things holding me back:

1. I want the food more than I want to be thin
2. My body is already be ruined from being this fat. I can't afford plastic surgery, so I will look like one giant deflated balloon. Not inspiring.

I do wish I had love in my life and realize that I could more easily find it thinner. But, then, I think who will want me with a deflated balloon body?

As to wanting the food more, I really can't explain it. It is like a compulsion almost. I want the food more than I want anything. That is why I can't seem to stick to a new food plan for more than a few days. My plan is perfectly reasonable (1800 calories), but I want the pizza. I want the ice cream, etc.

Does that ever stop? Does it ever get easier?

I felt similar to you in the past however it starts with YOU! You have to value YOURSELF enough to say, SO WHAT if I look like a deflated balloon I'm losing weight for ME.

You have to start fighting back because you are your own worst enemy. If you do not love yourself than it's going to be very difficult to put yourself before food and/or other people. Most of the time that result in self-pity and sulking which causing more pain which causing more eating.

It's a very vicious cycle that many of us subject ourselves to. I'm an advocate for "loving yourself." Your willpower, disciple and motivation will start once you learn that you are more important than being unhealthy. Self confidence will be your "knight in armor."

I had to learn that to stop this yo-yo dieting.

You deserve it!