Thanks so much everyone! I am FINALLY back on the wagon. I woke up today with a sense of determination that I haven't had in a long time. I love how my brain just turned on!
I had an excellent day. Ate wonderful, had an excellent workout and went and tried on dresses - it just motivated me because I tried on this one outfit that made me realize what a great body I am going to have!
I actually saw myself in a size 12 instead of a 16. And I am glad that I am not seeing myself in size 4 because I am NEVER going to get there. My booty will not go much beyond a 10. And I am ok with that because I want a big but incredibly toned and muscular butt. It was the first thing I really loved when I lost all the weight before. I make Jessica Biel look like Kate Hudson lol.
I am writing on my blog a lot - you can link to it from the lefthand side. I used to write in a journal but I am hoping that by writing in here where I know I am sharing with others that it may help motivate someone one day and/or it makes me feel much more accountable. It lists my long term and short term goals and weekly gym and food intake
I was really lucky during my last weight
I have one month to the wedding...I have decided that I'm not ready for a dress yet, but I am going to buy a really cute top and a pair of Christian Loubotons...I've always wanted a pair and since that will be my first goal - I think I deserve it!
Also, I found 2 pictures of me where I was about 190 I think when I lost a bunch of weight the first time and I had a ton of muscle. I look at it and think, wow I looked great. I remember then thinking how fat I still was. It sure provides perspective! I am going to use pictures of myself to motivate me (not just the one that I took on April 15th in less than superb form) - by knowing I got there once, it helps motivate me. I am going to take pictures every month.
I am really loving today and this site. I DO NOT like to talk about weight stuff with my friends and work people so this helps a lot!
Giving yourself a future of good health and high self-esteem by making yourself a priority is the best present of all!!! 
