The thing that led to my weight loss was a crush. I know it is the worst reason, and I know it should be done for yourself and your image. I'm not sure what started the love affair, but he was my close friend, and I ended up telling him how I felt... It didn't end well, and I felt like if he can't see past this skin than no one could. It really broke my heart, but he was really sweet about it. I was around 300lbs at the time, and I began thinking of him whenever I would reach for a snack or make a bad meal choice. I didn't want to give up on him, I felt it wasn't fair to him to expect him to take me as I was, that he deserved a skinny cute girl. Even though it was for the wrong reasons it really worked and I am down about 120lbs. We are actually best friends now, I can talk to him about everything! and I am so glad I had the guts to tell him or we wouldn't have ever gotten as close as we are.
p.s I am pretty new to this site and am not sure how to find posts, like I posted a reply to a couple of things and can't find where they were, does that make sense? If it does could someone send me a message how to find what I have posted. Thanks
There is one easy way of seeing everything you posted. If you look at your most recent post, you should see your screen name on the left side. It's a link. Click on it, and a drop down list appears. Then click on "all posts" or whatever it says.
Another way is to click on "Quick Links" above, on the purple/blue bar. And then click on "subscribed threads". Because the messages you post on, or start, you should be subscribed to. If not, then there is a way to change it in your preferences so you are subscribed.
I wanted to share with you that I also lost a lot of weight once for a crush. I was in my early twenties, and my brother worked with this guy who I thought was so cool looking. He was super tall and skinny and had really pretty blue eyes. I thought he was worth having at any cost. I lost a ton of weight and then asked him to come over. I threw myself at him, and he accepted the offer. He was actually dating another girl at the time, and he told me he was leaving her for me. But the reality was that he didn't end his other relationship. He ended up dating both of us for more than a year before I figured it out. In fact, he added another girlfriend, so he was seeing 3 different girls at the same time. He broke my heart. I was an emotional wreck for a year, after I broke it off with him. It was really one of the worst things I ever did to myself, because I was willing to do anything to be with him. And it ended up being at great cost to my dignity and self worth. I think you are smart to at least have a crush on a friend who is a good guy, who won't degrade you. I hope and pray you end up healthy, happy and with someone who loves and honors you!
I have gained 50 pounds in the last year. It pains me to type that. How the heck does one gain 50 pounds in a year? And I was overweight before that. I had an ankle and foot problem that prevented me from exercising. I quit caring, I quit trying. I feel gross. I wanted to paint my toenails, and I could barely do it. I can barely make it up two flights of stairs. My fat pants don't fit. My closets are bursting, and I have nothing to wear. I weigh probably 40 pounds more than DH, and he thinks he is fat. I can barely fit in an airplane seat and do up the seatbelt. If I don't smarten up I will soon be 300 pounds!
I have one week of Weight Watchers under my belt, and I think I have finally turned the corner to getting my life back.
You've come to the right place. Many of us wonder how we gained that weight, and the answer was, one bite at a time. Fortunately you can lose it the same way. Choose your bites!
Wow! I am new here and reading this thread really hits home. I can feel for all of you and it is reassuring to see I am not the only one thinking and feeling these things! For me this camel is seriously damaged. There has been so many straws to break it's back.
I avoid cameras and I hate that my children will look back at their baby pics and wonder what the heck I looked like. I hate that if something were to happen to me, they would not have any pictures of me after my wedding.
I realized that when I was younger I used to always double cross my legs (over the knee then wrapped behind so my ankle tucked behind the other) and now I can barely cross them once. My fat knees seem to just slide off each other.
I hate that I am no longer dealing with cellulite in the upper thigh area but all the way to my ankles. ICK.
I hate avoiding events because I have nothing to wear that doesn't make me look like I am wearing a tent.
I hate that I can't go shopping because if it fits over my thighs it is too big in the waist and gaps in the back (I am a serious pear shape).
I hate that I have bins and bins of clothes that are too small and still have the tags on them.
I hate that I refuse to go shopping because I "know" I won't be this size much longer. I hate even more that I have been saying that for 6 years.
I hate that I just went for four days to my hometown and I refused to tell anyone I was going to be there because I am too fat and I don't want any one to see me.
I hate having my family look at my butt or thighs or arms when they think I don't notice, and seeing a look of disgust.
I hate that my family looks at me sideways when I order at a restaurant, knowing they are thinking to themselves "no wonder she is so fat".
I hate that I never want to be intimate with my husband because I feel so ugly and gross.
I hate that my children have told me they don't want to get fat like me (too young to realize this hurts).
I hate avoiding business situations that could seriously benefit my income because I feel too fat.
There is more... but I think you can all see this poor camel is in need of a medic.
I've collected all of those straws...and my poor camel just kept groaning under the load.
The final one for me was getting a diagnosis of kidney disease...and pre-diabetes...and seeing my life was getting limited. I have a great life, wonderful husband family and friends, interesting work, beautiful home, and lots of interesting travel. Recently I started noticing that when we traveled I did less...wanted to walk less so I saw less and did less...then my sister started to cry and said she was taking a cruise with friends and had wanted to invite me, but couldn't because she couldn't share a room with me because my snoring was so loud. I understood...and hated myself.
Then I got the diagnosis of kidney disease. Suddenly I started seeing my future, instead of travel it would be dialysis. Instead of walking I was heading towards a knee replacement and a wheelchair. My doctor challenged me to lose two pounds a month. I've taken up that challenge...and it's different this time. I'm doing it! I will do it! I will maintain the loss.
This board is a great help...(as is Lyn's Escape from Obesity blog which I read from the beginning over the last few weeks, I highly recommend it.)
I know there have already been many posts, and I've read them all, but I still want to add mine!
For me, there have been lots of straws, lots of determined speaches (on my part) of how I'm really going to do it this time...lots of beginings and just as many endings. What FINALLY did it was a trip to SouthBeach, FL w/ my hubby and kids. I had to be out by the pool and I was wearing a bathing suit that has a skirt attached, but my thighs still rubbed together (which is embarassing in a bathing suit). I felt like a whale! Everyone else by the pool was stunningly skinny...earing g-strings, etc. They were all so thin and beautiful! My hubby and I would go to restaurants and eat way too much...binge together....because we were so miserable. It was terrible and I don't think I enjoyed a single bite....really! We would go shopping, but there was nothing to buy. We focused on shoe stores, but what's the point?
Anyway, when I came back, I took another week of doing nothing and then, I finally commited. That was in the middle of May. I have lost 30 lbs. since then and I feel SO MUCH BETTER. I've realized that you don't have to wait until you're at goal to feel good.
I did have some set-backs, but I jumped right back on. I can't wait to hit my goal...I have 25 lbs. to go and I never want to gain any of this back...ever. I'm sick of having a closet full of cute, trendy clothes and not being able to wear them. I hate looking for something to wear and trying to figure out if it looks bad or horrible. I can't stand going to parties because it's no fun to be the fat friend in the entire bunch. I also hate taking pictures and there are almost none w/ me in them.
I think I'm a food addict and I really hate that, but now, I know this will never change. I have lost the same 50 lbs. at least 4 times and a bunch more weight here and there and I just need to realize that I can never just relax about this...I now have my routine and I plan to stick to it for the rest of my life.
I can't wait to be an inspiration to others here....as so many of you have inspired me. I don't just get inspired by the ones who have reached goal. I get tons of inspiration by the people who have a lot to lose and are so focused and determined. I also get inspired to do better when one of us on here slips....sometimes it's me, sometimes it's one of you..but it's a reminder that this isn't easy and it needs constant work.
This isn't an Oscar speech! Sorry! Hugs to all of the "chicks!"
Honestly, I don't really know what broke the camel's back...
I think part of it was just that my life had become increasingly unhappy... I had a great new job, I was newly married... yet I was MISERABLE. Hard to lvoe other things when you don't love yourself.
I didn't feel I fit in at my job b/c I work in law enforcement and a FATTY doesn't quite fit the ideal. My sex life with my husband was almost nonexistent, not because he didn't find me sexy, but we were both too big and lazy and tired at the end of the day to put the effort into it (I KNOW sex shouldn't be an "effort", awful isn't it?) And I just hated the situation. HATED it. We argued about it and I cried about it... and I know it was ME I hated... and the angrier I got about it, the more my relationship suffered...
So... it was New Years 2008... and I'm not one for resolutions. So I didn't make one. I just said I'm going to do it. And I rushed out of the gate from day one. I've had a few setbacks (just coming off a two-week binge) but I can proudly say that 6 months after, I'm 38 pounds down instead of 38 pounds heavier (which was certainly possible)
I was over 300 pounds when I started. I had once said before that I would never go over 250. Now? I'd rather never see the 200's ever again. Hopefully I'll accomplish that. B/c I know truly, the only way my LIFE will be happy is if *I'm* happy.
Last edited by BrandNewJen; 07-02-2008 at 03:38 PM.
I didn't feel I fit in at my job b/c I work in law enforcement and a FATTY doesn't quite fit the ideal.
I almost cried when I saw you are in probation!! That was my goal job... county, state, and then federal... I was aiming for the top! Then I hurt my back at the Jail where I work and it's a county jail (about 200 inmates) so "fatty" seems to fit the job description there. So many of my co-workers are over weight. Now that i hurt my back I will never be in probation... I cant even work my job at the jail as a corrections officer b/c of my limitations from my back injury.
I gained 50 pounds in the 5 months after my back injury and surgery.
I got sick and tired of being huge-- I had my laptop on my lap and my BELLY clicked the mouse for me!!! What the...I was not happy. I also was planning a vacation to the bahamas! I imagined the pictures I'd bring home from the bahamas of this whale on the beautiful beaches... I decided it was time for me to lose weight and get down to 160 before my trip to the bahamas on November 2nd... I will do it, i want to feel beautiful in the bahamas and i want to wear a bikini for the first time in ten years!! Last time i wore a bikini was in December 1998 on a florida vacation. (and even then i thought i was huge... if only i knew what i'd look like today... i would have done a photo shoot!! haha)
When I realized that I was straining the seams of my size 5X clothes. Knowing that I weighed over 400 pounds. 400 pounds! A weight I swore I would never even come near... I had exceeded it. That I couldn't walk from one end of my small house to the other without feeling as if I couldn't breathe. When I couldn't keep my house the way I like to because it was just too much for me. When I couldn't climb out of my car! I could go on and on. It just finally hit me that if I don't get this under control and get to a healthy, normal weight, I might as well hang it up, now. Because I was killing myself.
I am making progress. Some days I do better than others. But, unlike the many, many, many other attempts I have made, I feel as if this is my time. My turn.
It was two things that happened for me that finally broke the camel's back.
First, I was looking at some photos of me and my BF and noticed that I had bulges everywhere! And at the time I thought I looked good and was feeling great about myself for once. Obviously, I didn't look good at all.
The next happened about a week later when I went shopping with my mom. I was in the store and I kept on seeing all these women older and smaller than me..and I started to feel uncomfortable so I left and waited in the car. When my mom finally finished and got in the car she said something to me that made the decision for me. " If you're not going to do anything about it (my weight), are you going to hide your entire life at home?" I realized she was right..I cried a little afterwards and here I am starting out. I shouldn't be hiding, I should be out living life. And I survived my time to a gym (I was mortified! Thank god I had a buddy or I would of bolted), so it'll get easier from there.
The final straw for me is very easy to pin point I will never forget the very moment it occurred. After being a stay at home mom for 3 years I had decided to return to school and get my masters degree. I'm a very driven person and work extremely hard to reach my goals both personal and professionally. I was gaining weight at a rapid pace in school but I didn't mind because I was making great grades and still spending allot of time with my son and husband. I just figured I would loose it once I graduated and it could be my new project. Last fall I was going through recruiting which involved dinners, meet & greets, and interviews I was running out of things to wear because I hadn't worked professionally in years and none of my old stuff would fit. For one event I was trying really hard to find something without having to buy anything new and was getting really upset. That’s when my husband came up with a really great idea of just wearing some of my maternity pants with a long dress shirt and nobody would know. I quickly dug out my box grabbed the first pair of dress pants I saw and tried to put them on. I could not even pull them all the way up. I just sit down dumbfounded I couldn’t believe it at that point I had not even weighed my self in about a year and half. I was so shocked I didn’t know what to do I couldn’t even be upset. I felt as though something had to be wrong but it still didn’t sink in until later. I went to the event in a new outfit. While I was at the dinner I suddenly realized I was the fattest person there. It was so noticeable to me and for the first time in my life I was very self conscious Although I had been chubby for years I was obese now and looked every bit of it. I just stood there with chills running down my spine staring. It was like I suddenly understood what I had done to myself.
Many of us wonder how we gained that weight, and the answer was, one bite at a time. 
Fortunately you can lose it the same way. Choose your bites! 
