The single most upsetting thing in my life...my weight.
I have been struggling so badly for so long but I just can't seem to conquer the initial hurdle of committing to myself to lose the weight.
I have never been a skinny minny and I do not want to be. A healthy 140 would be amazing. All my life I have been overweight to some degree. I lost 42 pounds to get down to 128 before getting married and looked fabulous, felt amazing and was so happy. After marriage I slowly gained weight back, struggled with getting pregnant and gained more and more. I got up close to 180. I got up to 218 while pregnant with my son and since he was born - 2 years ago - I have been hovering at 185ish. I am only 5'1".
Can anyone help me figure out why I can't get started? Why I can't commit to losing weight? I know this is a very personal problem and something I have to figure out but I was hoping maybe that someone could throw something out there that would help me get past this initial hurdle.
It's a serious problem and the only one standing in my way. I know EXACTLY what to do to eat better, lose weight, feel better, etc. Counting calories is my plan along with lots of water and consistent exercise. I wake up and say 'okay, this is it, I want to be healthier and happier' and then something always gets in the way and I am knocked off course. I can be good for about three days and then whamo.
I am afraid of something? Just not sure what it is. Afraid of success? Easier to be fat? I know I have a lot of weight to lose for so many reasons.
I was hoping maybe someone 'outside' can maybe pinpoint something or give me an idea of how to get started. Commit. Once I commit I know I won't waiver too much and I'll be able to get on the road to losing.
I have so much to lose there's NO REASON I can't drop 10 pounds to get me started.!! I've got 50 to lose. No joke. I could stand to lose a lot more than that but 50 will make me happy and comfortable!
Be honest with me. I can take it really. I need the blatent truth.
Motivation is having the desire and willingness to do something. I feel that without the desire and willingness, nothing will happen.
Try this: sit down and write down all the reasons why you want to lose weight and all the reasons why you want to stay fat. Then read it a few times. Until you convince yourself to do something, it won't work. Procrastination can be one reason why nothing is working for you. Also start a PLAN. Take all your measurements and write them down. Write down your goals of what you want your measurements to be and what you want to weigh. Sit down with a good light cookbook (I love Cooking Light website for this) and make a menu plan for the next week. Plan all your meals and then buy the ingredients to make your new healthy meals. Give it a week and see how you feel.
I have a hard time getting started sometimes, too. Having a plan is what works for me, and I hope it will work for you.
Oh, and don't forget to check back in here often! The best support can be found all over the board here!
I can't tell you "why" you won't stay committed but you say you can stay on course for about 3 days. I think maybe you should plan and maybe even prepare your meals on sunday for the whole week. Then you've already cooked the food, might as well stay on course and eat it. No since in wasting. My biggest problem usually is breakfast. If i don't prepare it for a whole week at a time, i am totally lost on what to eat. I don't have time to cook before work, so i have to have my egg muffins made in advance so all i have to do is throw them in the microwave at work and presto....healthy breakfast. I also generally make my chicken breast on sunday night so all i have to do is put it in my lunch bag the night before and grab it and go in the morning. presto....lunch for the week. I always plan out my food and cook as much of it as i can in advance so i can pack my lunch bag at night and just grab it on the way out the door in the morning. Makes my week so much easier. I keep boxes of raisins and 5 bananas at work in my drawer so i'm always ready for my snacks. I buy yogurt for the week and put one in my lunch bag each night. Dinner is usually chicken breast also and a veggie out of a can. presto. dinner for the week. I find the best way to stay on plan, is to have a plan for the whole week all mapped out on sunday.
Good luck. I hope you find something to keep you on track.
I agree with Lumi. Plan your meals for an entire week and then stick to it. Planning is always what saves me - I shop on Sundays for the week, I know what I'm having every meal and then I stick to my plan.
We'll try to help out! You're not alone in having troubles getting started.
Do you know what it is that happens after three days that gets you off your plan? Is it an event? A night out? A party? A tough day? It might be useful to see what sorts of things intervene and cause you to stop.
Life is always going to be full of unplanned events, sudden changes, surprises like the spouse bringing home pizza, and so on. But those who want to be successful in losing weight have to learn how to get through those things without blowing the plan. For instance, you may need to know how to say no to pizza that suddenly appears. You may need to eat something other than what everyone else is having.
I agree with those who say plan ahead--it's hard to succeed otherwise. It doesn't mean you need to know every bit of food down to the last berry, but it does mean that you have some choices for each meal, and the food on hand for them.
If this really is the most upsetting thing in your life, then you will find out how to change it. Take heart! You can do it!
I couldn't get myself going either. I think, for me, I had to stop aiming for perfection and start doing "better".
So, week one - no cookie at lunch, no eating after 7pm. Week two - redesign my breakfast, short walk at lunch. Week three - well you get it, right?
This was pretty easy to do and I found my little successes motivated me to do more.
I also agree about the planning. Sometimes eating healthy requires some effort on our part. But if the good stuff is in the fridge and ready to go, that takes away one of the excuses I used in the past!
In some ways, it is easier to be fat. We can get ourselves into a comfort zone - we know how to be fat, there's no challenge there!
I have had similar experiences as you and also need to lose about 50 pounds or more. I decided that I needed the structure and support of a weight-loss program (I found one at a local hospital - perhaps you can check in your area hospitals for one, or try Weight Watchers) and I'm also seeing a behavior therapist. Like you, I wanted to know why I could be "good" for a few days or weeks and then have something set me off and go tumbling off the wagon. Between my therapy and my support group, I'm learning to recognize my triggers and understand why some situations cause me to overeat.
When I need to get some focus back, I pick one thing to make better about my eating. Perhaps you can try that starting now. Can you eat more fruits and vegetables? Take a 20-minute walk each day? Start off with a great breakfast?
Good luck with finding a plan that works for you. Recognizing that you need some help and guidance is the first step towards living a healthy life.
I read a book by Ellie Krieger - Small Changes, Big Results. She discusses diet, exercise, and wellness. The idea of just making small changes and not being perfect all at once really helped me to get started. I had a little sucess and that motivated me to try for more sucesses....
Great thread, lots of good ideas and suggestions here.
Do you journal? Perhaps sitting in a quiet place and writing down your thoughts as to why you're having a tough time starting will bring some light to your situation.
I couldn't deal with the total amount of weight I need to lose ... it was overwhelming. So I began by setting a Mini-Goal of 20 lbs., and gave myself from 7/1 to 12/31 to lose that weight. Now that the scale is beginning to move lower, that is a huge motivator for me to continue.
What is keeping me from making the Commitment?
You may need to eat something other than what everyone else is having.
