[kaplods]

To play devil's advocate, I've had a lot of friends who could not be "supportive" (by my definition) in one area or another in my life, for a variety of reasons (and I'm sure they felt the same about me). It didn't necessarily make any of us bad friends. Sometimes it was over diet, weight loss, religion, or other life choices.

I think it's often very difficult to be "appropriately" supportive in a lot of situations. If you say too much or too little, it can come across as rude or disinterested. It can be a hot topic for some people where nothing you can say or do is the "right" thing, especially if you disagree. If she's generally been a good friend, and only on the topic of weight loss does she seem to drop the ball, then this may just be a sore spot for her.

On the other hand, it seems to be a sore spot for you too. Cheering her on to her face, and cursing her behind her back, isn't worthy of a real friendship either. You're not being honest with her, and my guess is she knows it. Insincerity has a way of coming across. If a friendship with her is important to you, you should be able to tell her how you feel (without blaming her for your feelings).

Obviously the entire situation can't be explained in a couple paragraphs, so I have no idea whether any of this applies to you and your friend, but I know it's really hard to tell people what we need or want from them, and easy to feel disappointed when they don't come through for us. Usually they're completely oblivious of our hurt feelings (which only convinces us more of their insensitivity). You can't count on anyone, no matter how close, to read your mind (my husband is constantly reminding me of that). You have to tell people how you feel, and ask for what you want from them ("Being supportive," is too general, because it means different things to different people - she might really think she was being supportive).

If she's been a good friend otherwise, this is worth working on together, or if it's too hot a topic for either of you, avoiding the subject altogether.

[lendingheart]

Yep, jelouse... plain and simple.

i live in a horrible community... drugs and such.... most people on welfare and yes over weight... now when someone loses weight they say... " they are on drugs/meth" which maybe true for some.

i had a friend that was bigger then me...265 she lost down to my size and was happy about it....i was even asking her how she did it... i made mention that i needed to loose 80 lbs and she got mad. She said her goal was to be me! 220 at the time

Well thats a great short term goal... but dont stop when you are in "obese" catagory.... keep going, I thought!

We both had been underweight at one time in our lives... one of our friends had 2 kids ( where we each only had one) and that friend lost all her weight and then some... she looked great! She ended up divorced ( had nothing to do with her weight) and got a wild man for her next man... she did get too skinny... stress from a divorce will do that to some.... anyway when she started dating the wildman people took notice of her life and at the same time she lost more weight what do you think happened?.... " Shes on drugs"

Sorry no! Fact is you cant please anyone... so please yourself. if you are fat they will talk about you.... if you are skinny they will talk about you.

That is why i love it here... i can make friends and be honest with everyone here... i dont have to worry that so and so will be jelouse, or accuse of me of something awful.

We can post pictures and feel honeslty inspired in a healthy way to lose weight... ( they lost x amount of pound and they are older then me, i can do it) not look at one person and want to be skinner then them... " just to show them"

I want to lose weight because for once i want to be infront of the camera and not feel scared to see the results... my little boy loves to act on camera and wants mommy to be in the show.... i cant do it! I had to set the camera down a few times and walk onto one side of the shot.... i saw me from behind and i cant stand it!

Do it for yourself and your family... no one else!