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Old 09-27-2006, 01:32 PM   #1  
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Default venting!! Family not supportive

I decided to become a vegetarian 3 and a half years ago after my Dh went to his sisters farm pick out a pig and killed it. My family supports me infact my mother introduces me to new veggie meals everytime I visit. No one in either family is a vegetarian.
But my in laws won't lay off. Over 3 yrs later I can't go to any family event where it dosent come up. My BIL always tells me they have lots of hotdogs, burgers ect. "chuckle chuckle" I politely say no thank you and get a oh come on. This last weekend I heard "you don't know what your missing" That sent me over the edge I eat meat for 27yrs. I know exactly what I am missing! When people are there that don't know they always make a big deal to let them know. And in their explaination it "She saw a little piggy killed" chuckle.
It took 2yrs for them to stop asking me if I was over this phase yet, or oh arent you over that yet.
The reason it always comes up is when we sit to eat they ALWAYS say oh I don't have anything for you to eat. I tell them a million times I am fine with the meatless side dishes. So once that is brought up everyone puts their 2 cents in. I never talk about, or try to turn anyone. I cook meat for my family and we have it at all of the events we put on. Its been over 3 YEARS how can shut them up? I never force it on them I dont think they should bug me about it anymore. Any advice?
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Old 09-27-2006, 02:08 PM   #2  
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You know, some people are just ignorant or feel threatened for some reason by the vegetarian lifestyle. I’ve became a vegetarian when I was 14 and all these years later my grandmother is still “forgetting” and offering me meat every time I see her. Some people will never understand and it will always be a joke to them. It sucks, but there’s not much you can do about other people’s ignorance sometimes. My family has mostly come to a sort of acceptance, they still have no idea what to feed me so I cook for myself on the rare occasion I’m visiting but they don’t really give me too much grief about it anymore. And that only took 12 years, hang in there another 9 years and maybe your in-laws will come off it already.

I know it’s easier said than done, but in the mean time just try not to let them get to you. I mean you could try to fight back and call them inhuman blood-thirsty cretins for getting some sort of enjoyment out of killing animals and eating their flesh, but that wouldn’t do anyone any good and they wouldn’t take you seriously. Why sink to their level? You made your choice for your own reasons and it’s their problem if they decide to be jerks about it.
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Old 09-27-2006, 02:13 PM   #3  
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Unfortunately people make fun of what they do not understand or is different from their own ways. I remember years back when my niece from my husbands side came to visit us. I was frustrated because I wanted to be a good host to our guest but she had adopted a life style that at that time was totally foreign to me. She had adopted a full fledged vegan lifestyle. Being raised in a meat and potatoes family I had no idea how to cook for her. Everything I made at that time had meat, eggs or cheese in it. Not only that but she couldn't use the soaps and shampoos that I had because she would inform me they were tested on animals. Being ignorant back then I was worried about her not getting enough nutrients and very frustrated because I felt I could not do anything right to be a good host. I would get very tense at my husband when I knew she was coming. It was not until I started to educate myself that our relationship changed. I still have not adopted the vegan life style like going out of my way to choose certain products(sorry if that offend some) but I have adopted a vegan diet and now I get to frustrate my meat and potatoes family.
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Old 09-27-2006, 03:49 PM   #4  
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I've found that the people who are so critical of vegetarianism lack understanding of it and therefore can't respect it. Also, where are the in-laws from? My BF's friends are small-town, meat and potatos Nebraskans thru and thru and they tease me constantly (and are sometimes downright mean) because of their assumptions of my upbringing and what I eat. I've recently discovered that they just had no idea how it affected me. I had had enough of being teased about being a "gay, birkenstock wearing, veggie burrito-eating" hippy from Colorado that I made a comment about Nebraska. It stopped them in their tracks. They truly had no idea. And i'm not gay, I wear Teva's, not Birkenstocks, and I like tacos, not burritos. So it shows you how much knowledge went behind their comments.

And no offense to Nebraskans. As a whole I've been overwhelmed by the kinrdness of the people there. I just had no idea how much they dislike Coloradans I don't necessarily reccommend insulting your in-laws, but my point is that I had no idea that they had no idea.

I do understand how frustrating it is and this topic has been on my mind today because of the thread going in the support forum. I don't know what to tell you except not to take personally what others choose to think.

I know. A no good answer, but it's all I have at the moment...
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