[Mina]

Have any of you ever steered away from being either vegetarian or vegan and wandered back?

I stopped being vegan a few years about because I had some serious health concerns. I won't go into further detail her, because it's rather of a personal nature.

Anyway, lately I've been trying to go back to my old habits, but I've felt like I have less will power than I formerly had. I also feel this will power is the base root at my problem with dieting at the moment. I started out losing weight steadily with WeightWatchers, and gradually I stopped being so ardent and haven't been serious about it the past few weeks.

Does anyone ever feel (not just about veg*nism but about dieting or healthy eating in general) tired of the whole "weightloss" journey and end up backtracking/losing will power?

I'm not sure how to kick start myself into a more healthy (and hopefully more vegan) lifestyle. I have this feeling that both issues are related and if I can get one in check, I will have the strength to master both problems.

Any thoughts?

[TBJ333]

Maybe what you were doing before was too restrictive, and you're subconsciously avoiding doing the same thing?

When I try to form new habits, I don't make myself be perfect. I usually do things a certain number of days per week, or once a day, or whatever. (Like right now I limit myself to one soda per day.) You could try eating one vegan meal per day, or only five non-vegan meals per week. Then maybe you won't be daunted by drastically changing everything at once.

Good luck!

[Mina]

yes... I was quite restrictive. I was a VERY strict vegan.

(sorry, the following will ramble as I'm up late and feeling like typing... )

What happened actually was more a mental health issue that I was stressed from school, work and life at home and ended up (I think) using food as a control. I also found that I got so busy that I would forget to eat often, and as a result I was losing weight unintentionally (here I was around 125 and dropped to about 120 -- back in the thin days.... )

Ultimately, I think what happened was something of a mental breakdown which started with food issues in which I was paranoid about the content of my food. I thought people were going to add animal products to things I ate... even obviously vegan friendly foods, such as a vegan lasagna that my (non-veg) roommate had tried to make for me in an effort to encourage me to eat. I stopped eating and developed a host of other strange, paranoia and problems like that.... ended up spending considerable time in mental hospitals and finally staying with a family friend who encouraged me to eat a broader diet. I think that was what changed me ultimately, living witha family that had "normal" eating habits.

The first meal I had after not having eaten any substantial food for a few weeks (other than water, bread, a few other piddly things) was a vegetarian burrito from Papa Chano's that they ordered with sour cream and cheese on it. I was reluctant to eat at first, but I didn't care ultimately because I realized once I bit into it how hungry I actually was.

Bringing things more to the present, I think you're right that I'm afraid of being restrictive. I think also my tastebuds have changed back to liking some of the more sugary and seductive tastes of the non-vegan foods and I can't get over it as much. I also find that I'm put in situations (such as at work or around holiday events) which include non-vegan elements, and I just am tired of always explaining to everyone about my lifestyle. For instance, tonight I went to a staff party with my new boss, and she is totally not one for animal rights because she's a hunter and even has deer hides on her couch. I try to be polite, because I realize this doesn't change her whole personality... but it still bothers me... anyway, I didn't explain to her that I prefer no animal products, and she gave us all packages of her homemade treats.

Also, in addition to being restrictive with vegan foods, I find that the added restrictions of my WW program of Core foods puts a double onus on me to limit what I eat. That leaves me feeling like I can't eat most of the foods that many people enjoy. But I guess if losing weight were easy, it wouldn't be so profitable and we wouldn't even need to have a website/forum/etc. such as this ....

[Mina]

I just had a thought. About your suggestion.

Maybe I'll say I'm vegan about the things I can control at home. I had a friend who started out that way. She said she was vegan at home, but if she went out to a restaurant, she would loosen up... or if someone made something and it had dairy in it, like a pastry, she would have some.

I think I will start out that way.

My only worry with this is that being less restrictive about this makes me feel less inclined to limit myself.... calorically and healthwise.

I guess I will set another limit like that...

like for the basket of treats my boss gave me... I will keep the package somewhere out of easy reach and only eat them once in a while, or maybe save till Christmas... (even though I've endulged somewhat)... I feel like if someone does something nice like that, it shouldn't go to waste... and there's some tasty stuff in there... like those peppermint bark things... and some sugar cookies, etc.

I dunno. I think also, when I first started being vegan, it was easier because I lived with my parents starting out and they both were vegan themselves. Now my mom is not as strict, and I'm constantly exposed to people at work who are omnivores, and even that seems weird to them.... so I think it's different circumstances than when I started out...

[Yogini]

{Mina} It sounds like you have been through the ringer!

Ultimately, you have to do what makes YOU feel comfortable, healthy and safe at the end of the day.

Personally, I could not ever eat animal products unless there were no other viable sources of calories and starvation was an imminent threat. I don't think you'll meet a more strict vegan than me. I will not even EAT where animals are served as food

You have to make sure that your transition to veganism is a healthy one and given your past I can appreciate that there would be concerns.

All I can say is best of luck and send me a messgae when you need to talk.