[I choose]

Well now, that doesn't sound too promising does it? I used to belong to a tops group for several years but I stopped going and of course I have ballooned up tremendously. At the moment I am at my highest of 274 pounds. I am 5'6 and should be 140 at 54 years of age. Sigh. I guess I am wishing there was an easy way, you know, go to sleep and wake up thin and healthy. The meeting in the next town is Wednesday mornings, I still have the old TOPs book just need the push I guess. Have the meetings changed much in the past 5 years?

[mompen]

I haven't seen any changes really in the meetings...

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[I choose]

I am so betwix and between. I am also lazy. I have been on Atkins but after about 4 days I go beserk and eat a loaf of bread, I have been on Tops, and on everything else ever devised but I am still obese. I know that it is a psychological determination to just do it but I don't seem to have the energy. I am also going through a change of lifestyle, I retired at Christmas because of heart problems and my husband retired at the end of June so of course there is a lot of readjustment going on in my life. I used to enjoy TOPS but it is in a small town and of course if I go back I will feel totally like a failure but maybe that 's what I need to do, admit that I can't do it myself and get some help. The doctor put me on a fat removal pill - yuck, I was so sick and couldn't leave the bathroom for days. It is definitely not something that I want to continue. I hate nausea and refuse to suffer through it, I told him I'd rather die of a heart attack than take that pill. I have a Welsh Corgi that I take for walks daily and I live in a split level so am always going up and down stairs. I know that is not enough exercise but right now it is all I can handle or rather all I can make myself handle.

Well, sorry for the ramblings, guess I am sort of sorting out my thoughts and motives here.

Oh yes, I am 54 and live in Canada.

[lady06498]

I choose,

First welcome. I know what you mean I am in the same boat kinda. We need to motivate ourselves. First let me say that you are not a failure if you go back. It takes a lot of guts and determination to decide that you are going to take the first step in getting healthy. None of us can do it alone that is why we come here. You have to make the first step. Next you need to find a way of eating for the present and the future. You have to find what works for you best. I don't blame you for not wanting to take the pill. I have feelings about the atkins myself. I know you need carbs everyday and the atkins doesn't allow that. You need the right kind of carbs. Carbs is where you get your energy from. Plus if you sit down and decide in your mind that this is what you are going to do and put together a plan for yourself you will gain a lot of energy. Just think you are retired from your job of your life that paid you. Now you can start a job that will pay you ten fold by extending your quality of life by making your eating plan your #1 priority. You have the time. Maybe you have too much time on your hands. Maybe you eat out of boredom. I don't know I know I do. Just sit down take a deep breath and think about your life and what you want out of it. Now is the time to start living it and living it healthy so you can get the most out of it. As far as going back to tops if it is what you really want to do and you are committed I think your group would love to have you back. We are harder on ourselves then others and never see the good side to things so I am here to remind you of just that.
Take this time for you and figure out what you want to do for the rest of your life and enjoy it.

Sherri

[shortstack]

I choose, sherri is so right. None of us want to be this way, but we choose to be because we don't take the necessary steps to get healthy. One day at a time is all any of us can do, and sometimes it's more like one hour at a time. I'm a type of person that eats cuz i like food, i eat because i'm bored, i eat cuz i'm nervous, i eat at pms time, I eat when i'm scared. By not choosing to eat at these times, I'm taking steps to a healthy me. I have things to live for. You have what a lot of us dream of having, but it's a catch 22, what do you do with you time when you get there. I think the tops group is exactly what you need. Time for you. Hubby and you at home all the time, all day. That is an adjustment. Maybe hubby could join with you. Maybe you both could do the eating plan. Maybe you both could take those walks. Giving back to yourself isn't wrong. Enjoy life now. Enjoy your time together, and enjoy yourself.
Take care and you can do this. Come here, and help us, and we will help you.