I know I am not around much but I think of everyone often and I do come and read. I have a question that I hope someone can help me with.
Most of the chapter members are uncomfortable with having to say how much they gained or lost. I know it is a TOPS rule that you have to say but I was wondering if any of your chapters have had this problem? If you did....how did you deal with it? One of the ladies said it was optional at one of her old chapters but our co-ordinator says it isn't optional.
Any advice would be much appreciated. Will try and post more often.
Thanks,
This is one of the first things our new executive is going to address when we take over office. I have never announced my losses unless they were under a pound as I felt as if I was bragging. Most of our chapter admits to only a gain or a loss but this is wrong and it is wrong for several reasons and we are planning a frank and open discussion on this topic.
According to our area captain, gainers need to admit the amount of their gain not in order to open themselves up to ridicule or feel shame but to receive encouragement and support. I must say that when I look at it that way it seems like a good idea. If someone gained 4 lbs. over the course of a week perhaps they are in need of extra support, maybe they are experiencing troubles and a card or a call could help or at least lighten their burden. Losers should also state their loss as maybe the are onto something and could share with the group how they are accomplishing their success.
We plan on introducing this as a highly positive thing and encourage everyone to share the whys and the whatfores as well. For example "I had a gain of 2.5lbs, but my daughter was up from college and I cooked all her favorite meals as I am afraid she does not eat properly at school" or " "I lost 3 lbs. and I think it is becuase the weather has been so nice I have taken the dog for a long walk every night this week because I didn't want to miss out." I also think this will bring our group closer together as we will learn a little bit about each other along the way.
Both the above examples obviously need no extra support as the gaining mom knew why and probably had a wonderful visit and the losing dog walker was just enjoying the fresh air, but if someone was not eating because their brother was in the hospital and said " I had a loss of 2.5 lbs because my brother was in a car accident and I have spent almost all week at the hospital." Now we as a group can support them. Not clap or cheer and go on to the next member.
Plus our new leader said she needed to write down the losses in her book and it would make it much easier if everyone just said them at roll call. I have no idea about that as the leaders job is a mystery to me.
I have a question for all of you though, what do you say to all the gainers in your group? In our group we say "Have a good week" and when I brought this up at our executive meeting every one agreed that it was as annoying as heck and needed revision. I think it is condecending and while traditional it just ticks people off. Someone told me that their group says "You'll do better next wext week" and I far prefer it.
Well that's my 2 cents worth, I would be very interested in everybody else's opinion.
Thanks for your great response. I am going to print it off. I know it is hard to say you have gained......I find it hard but....I know it isn't meant as a punishment.
As for what we say when someone gains...I just did the same thing as my last chapter which is the only one I know. We say "we're here for you" but I don't know if everyone likes it or not.
Ok here is my two cents worth. I hope my co ordinator and area captain don't see as I might get demoted.
My number one concern as a leader is to help people. And having to say the amount you gained is horrible. It is bad enough to say you gained. I have no idea what that leader was talking about. She should be getting the weight recorders book from time to time and see what is going on.
It should be enough just to know someone gained. I know the rules say they are suppose to say amount but that doesn't mean it is a good rule. And I guarantee no chapter does everything to the letter. Human nature assures that. Members should be encouraging each other no matter what. When someone says they have gained we say, "See you lighter, Glad you came"
Just call me a rebel
Leaders job should not be a secret to anyone. Every chapter has a chapter guide book and anyone should be allowed to see it. It tells what all the duties are. The main thing is to lead and help everyone in the best way possible
In our chapter, you do stand up and say how much you lost or gained. However, if it bothers anyone to say how much they gained, they don't have to say the amount, just that they gained.
And we usually say, "We're glad you came", to the gainers.
I was glad to see your replies. I am tempted to go along with them and say they don't have to say the amount but just if they lost or gained. I know the area captain and co-ordinator will not be happy. The area captain is making her rounds so will have to be careful when she gets to our chapter. If we decide not to say amounts.....we will have to when she comes calling. I will have to warn everyone. It is very hard to say how much you gained and I am not one who wants attention drawn to myself when I lose.
Anyway....thanks again for taking the time to answer.
Have a great weekend.
my feeling is that of most. It shouldn't matter how much you did on either. Most people feel bad enough when they leave the scale with a gain, and to have to admitt to a huge gain, to some may even be more depressing. Most people if they had a huge gain, will say, "I gained". We all know how difficult it is sometimes to tell us on this board how we did. what we have to remember is what matters to that person, and what will keep them coming. Yes they may need more help, but we usually can tell that by the response. I notice some ladies won't even look up when they report. And I've never looked at it this way. How they may feel. We do enough kicking in the butt to ourselves. If the leader needs amounts for a contest, I don't see why they can't go to the weight recorder and get totals from there. They don't need to know actual weight of person for the contest. Or maybe the weight recorder needs to keep track of that. when you all have best loser of the month, who keeps that record. We usually don't go for a month, we just do weekly, but I would like to do the best loser of the month, and give prizes like sherri is giving, and this informaiton would help me to go to my leader.
Here is what we do in our chapter. We all take turnes going to the front and we admit what we did for the week. Either loss or a gain. Yes we do say how much. If they have a loss we all hoot and holler and say way to go. If they had a gain then we say that is okay you will take it off, you will do better next week. We really don't have any problems with people admitting their gains. Although when I gained the 6 lbs the other week I put a dollar in the can before roll call then added the extra. But I did end up saying that I gained the 6 lbs. It wasn't easy and I felt like a jerk but it made me do better the following week because I didn't want to go back with another gain. So I guess this does work like CC says. But it is not easy when you do gain.
Question regarding roll call
