Jolly - Thank you! Lets just hope it keeps building at this rate, and if the work doesn't kill me before I'm used to it, I'll be doing great! Congrats on resisting the call of the munchies. I know how hard that is.
Apple - I set a goal, then just see what happens. I mean .. like my scale goal for last month was to lose ten pounds. I lost eight. I consider that a win. But I have other goals that I shoot for - water intake, calorie intake, exercise. I don't always meet them, but I just keep them in mind. It's not a pass/fail - it's something to shoot for. If you fall a little short, you're still doing better than if you hadn't done anything at all!
Two horses on Saturday, five Sunday. My hands are sore. One of them was sure 'nuff determined to kick me off that rear hoof, yep. So my shoulders are a little sore, too. But he didn't get me. Eve was great training. I'm a little more sunburned, even with the sunblock. I kept TRYING to drink enough water to keep up with the sweating. Muscle building is warring with dehydration... very hard to tell how much I weigh. So... who cares. I know my jeans are fitting again straight out of the dryer. I know I feel stronger, more flexible, better. I'm going to need to tighten up the belt on my chaps again.
I need to find foods I can take with me out in a pasture... maybe pick up a little cooler for ice.
In four weeks, that 7 horses over two days goes up to 9 horses in one day. One week goal achieved. Nothing scheduled for this weekend... that's good and bad. I haven't had a 'day off' in three weeks. My house is a disaster. I knew this would happen, so ... it's just a part of the transitioning.
Ok .. back to work, off to drink water... back to the 'office job.' Bleh.
Good morning all. I am feeling pretty good today, for payroll MOnday. I resisted food again last night after work. And, I did do weights this morning. I am not doing a lot yet, but am trying to get into the routine of doing them. I figure then I can increase weight and reps, and eventually work with a personal trainer to design a more specific routine. After the habit is set.
So all in all, I feel good. Eating choices are improving, even if they aren't perfect yet. And I lost 1.9 pounds this week. A win all around.
Jolly - sounds like we are alot a like with the eating when we get home. It's not because I'm hungry. I just do it. I need to control it more. Went to the store and bought apples, strawberries and cantalope. If I grab something tonight, I'll be ready!
Today is my Mom's 79th birthday and I'm taking her out to lunch. I told her it was her choice. I hope it's someplace that I can stay within my points. As, I can relate to feeling like the Michelin Man today. I'm so bloated and have cramps soo bad. Not sure if the exercise will be happening today. I will try to get a walk in with the dogs tonight.
Raven - Sounds like you business is getting a great start. Good Luck!
Good luck with dinner, Kathy. I hope you have a nice time, and stay within points.
I just need to ramble right now. I am craving junk food sooooooo bad. And I am coming up with perfectly logical reasons why I "must" go to the store right now, or worse, why I "deserve" a little treat. Sometimes it is just so hard to keep the end goal in mind. I want to eat! I don't care, I don't care, I don't care.
But I do care. I don't want to look like this. I feel fatter now, since gaining 15 of the 35 I lost last year then I did at my highest. It is all psychological I know. I want to be healthy. I want to be more flexible and athletic. And most of all, I don't want to make excuses for myself. Unfortunately, I can't do my nails at work to keep me from food. I do have plenty of work to keep me busy, but it is the sort of work I usually self medicate or try to run from. Boring paperwork. Sigh.
If anyone sees my motivation, please have her send me a postcard at least. That might be enough to get me through the cravings until she comes home.
Ok Jolly - Talk yourself into the right frame of mind! You've already gotten a great start! What do you want? Really want? That food? Is it really going to taste that good? Will you feel good after you finish it? It's NOT going to taste that great. Chances are, you won't even taste most of it. And when you've finished..... well, you know how you'll feel about it.
Be proud of yourself, proud of eating your fruits and veggies and just tell yourself over and over and over that junk food really sucks. It tastes nasty, it makes you feel nasty, it contributes to weight gain. It's GROSS!!
You can do it Jolly! We are here for you but I know it's hard when you are sitting there by yourself. Like Raven says, keep talking yourself out of it. Try chewing a stick of gum. Sometimes that helps me. Hang in there!
Thanks everyone for the support. I got through it by eating lunch early. That took care of the hunger. I am doing bills now, so that helps me not want to spend $. It doesn't help that I have been PMSing for a month. Can't wait until I can talk to the doctor about this one.
Have a great evening, everyone, and thanks again for the help.
Heh guys, trying to come up with a post. Am so far behind though, so it's either just a little bit or nothing. I am in the same frame of mind as jolly I think and it's not good. I have probably been in a slow downslide since last fall. I have lost tons of muscle and so now, even though I am eating less than before, I keep gaining fat. I feel tired, lethargic and just more or less not really wanting to do anything. The gym is a big turnoff, whereas before I used to like doing it. I don't know. It got so crowded and I got sick of the gungho bodybuilders, so hung up on muscles and dieting. Whereas before I liked seeing the familiar faces, now I'm bothered by the fact that they are just like always there and I struggle to get to the gym for lack of time, when lack of motivation or energy. To tell your the truth, I really don't care that much about how I look. I mean, it's not a priority, though of course I would love to look great, I more just want to feel healthy and strong I suppose. The gym people seem so hung up on appearance, bodybuilders and aerobic anorexics alike. I am thinking of finding another gym, yet again, somewhere where people are serious but not fanatical. I will just have to try to get out there and plug along I think. I am trying to get away from this whole perfectionist idea, just enjoy things more. It's hard though. So many people are sooooo into appearance it seems here in Tokyo, and I don't just mean for socializing, I mean as work and for work and for getting the recognition you need in order to find work.
Raven -- I am loving what I am reading in your posts. The work coming your way! At last! And yes, you will lose weight, not that I think this is even going to be a priority any more for you. But, if you don't eat garbage, you will undoubtedly be getting leaner and stronger. I'm really glad this is happening for you. I am jealous and depressed actually by it in some ways, because I can't see anything similar happening to me. I don't even know what I want, that is the big problem.
Apple, how is your exercise program going? Did you get anything thought out yet?
jolly -- as I said above, I'm in the deep end floundering a bit like you. That said, you sound like you are still doing a lot even though you say you have no motivation. All those saves as well and handling the not eating at night. You're doing a lot better than me by the sounds of it.
Roxy -- hello there. Welcome aboard. How did your mom's birthday go? I hope you had fun. Hope you're feeling better.
Good morning all. Thanks Red. I do realize I am doing better overall. It is just times like yesterday, when all the food cravings come rushing back. And I can just hear those internal voices trying to "help" me get to the food. I did overcome it. Really, the only thing I can regret is that I did have some chips when I got home from work last night, but I was actually hungry. Stomach growling hungry, not bored/tired/upset hungry. I should have grabbed something healthier. Oh well.
I did my run this morning. 5 blocks jogging and 2 blocks walking. Felt good, even though i am still coughing up stuff. I have such a good little personal trainer. If only she didn't stop dead in front of me any time she found some tasty little garbage. Of course, I do get good sprints in when she sees rabbit or squirrel
Red, I am tossing you a life preserver, to help you out of the deep end. Seriously though. It is so hard when you are floundering. When you can see where you want to be, but all the old habits seem to be dragging you down. I don't know how to drop them off for good. But my thoughts are with you. Good luck finding a different gym.
Thanks for the link to the new thread, guys. I'm feeling really blue. The scale is up, I've not been visiting here and have skipped my ww meetings. I feel like a complete and utter failure and hope to get back on track, yet again.
I did pull out my journal and write down breakfast today. I'm not giving up but I am totally bummed out.
I wish I had you all right here at my house (not just on the computer) to follow me around and caution me every time I put something in my mouth....
Wonder if people could be hired to do "weight loss shadowing".... only kidding, but I feel like I need my own personal monitor here.
Linda
Sounds like we are all having the same problem. I didn't do too bad yesterday. Lunch with my Mom was at her favorite Mexican restaurant. I had a taco salad and didn't eat it all. I also had a small piece of birthday cake. Just used some of my weekly allowance points. Now I really have to be good this week.
Jolly - glad you made it through the day!
I'm feeling a little better today but still have those darn cramps. Good thing is it makes me not want to eat!
All of you.. Red, Jolly, Derry, Apple - For those of you who have been here for a while, you know I went into a massive backslide last year. I gained back 30 pounds, lost virtually all my muscle that I'd worked SO hard to build, stopped running... turned into a total sloth. I suppose there were 'reasons' it happened. But it truly bothers me that when life gets hard, I resort to hiding behind food and the TV in an attempt to escape. Or when life gets threatening to me because I'm not invisible anymore. These are things I'm facing THIS time around.
Red - I'm 45 years old and I'm finally just now figuring out what I want to do with my life, and being either stupid enough or brave enough (depending on my mood at the moment) to pursue it. It's terrifying, but exhilarating. I've never been so exposed, if you will. All my mistakes, my knowledge, my skills (or lack thereof) - right out there for everyone to see. I can't hide anymore, and it's been very, very good for me. During that 'down' time, I'd watch people here having such great successes and making goals and I'd feel so dejected. I wanted to do it. I knew what to do. I just couldn't seem to get there. I guess I really needed a reason. I mean a tangible, put my hands on it, physical reason. Looking better, feeling better, being healthy - wasn't enough. Sadly, even doing it as an example for my kids was not enough. I needed to do it for me, and even doing it for me, I needed a WHY. I'm built that way. So are my kids, darnit. I think that's why I needed a job, and I knew it, in which I was working with my body, my hands - and my brain. It's all coming together now. But I've been agonizing about this for about 4 years. I knew I needed more in my life, and it found me, I didn't find it. I was just open to it when it hit, that's all. Like I said... it's scary. It's all on me now, you know?
Jolly - Good for you for finding a solution to the hungries! We're all a puzzle. We need to be flexible, because our needs will change daily, just about. I find that when I start lifting (and I thought I was some sort of freak till I realize this is actually VERY normal and just about everyone goes through it) I was HUNGRY! I mean .. like .. chew the table leg off hungry. I had to start working harder at watching the nutrition content of my food. I needed much more protein than I was used to eating. I needed higher fat levels - but I couldn't drop my carbs too low, or I'd start getting sick to my stomach and weak. Your body might be telling you that you NEED better food. But I'm not sure what you're eating, so ... I'm just spouting off stuff. Feel free to ignore at will.
Linda - Been there. Probably will be there again, though god bless it I hope it's not soon. Please, whatever you do, don't beat yourself up over this. That won't help. Crappy feelings just beget more crappy feelings. Positive thoughts beget positive thoughts. And what I've found is that the thoughts usually result, ultimately, in positive actions. It may take some time, though. And don't expect total adherence or consistency when you're trying to get back on track, just do the best you can. Really.. the best. That's all you can do. And sometimes the best isn't going to be that great. But it will be what you can do. And then - hopefully soon - your best will be fantastic. *warm hug*
Hi all, I am new to the site and hope you don't mind my posting. I can relate to everything you guys are talking about. I know how finances can truly affect the dieting front it seems like all of the good for you food is so expensive! Jollygirl I read you are going to try to run a 5k this year and I am trying to train to do the same. Right now I am just walking six days a week and trying to lift weights three days a week but hop to work up to running soon. I have a sister who runs marathons and I want to run a 5k with her I know it will be very easy for her but she is willing to run with me for support. I am looking forward to hearing when you reach your goal. Well anyway I hope it is okay for me to jump in on your site and I look forward to hearing how things are going for everyone.
Just a quick hey and hang in there everybody!
No exercise plan really, just a daily walk and some sit ups. Next week school will be out and I want to start some jogging, just adding it to my walk gradually so my knees can get used to it.
Hate to bring it up but a friend of mine gave me a few pictures of me and my daughter from 2 years ago and YUCK. I hope I look a little better than that now......
Hi momof2r's....I'd love to run a 5k too....on another thread someone challenged herself to run a 5K every month for a year. If my knees agree to that I'm going to try it, but I won't make that decision for another month or so. I need to get moving first. How did you come up with your user name?
But I have other goals that I shoot for - water intake, calorie intake, exercise. I don't always meet them, but I just keep them in mind. It's not a pass/fail - it's something to shoot for. If you fall a little short, you're still doing better than if you hadn't done anything at all!
Eve was great training. I'm a little more sunburned, even with the sunblock. I kept TRYING to drink enough water to keep up with the sweating. Muscle building is warring with dehydration... very hard to tell how much I weigh. So... who cares. I know my jeans are fitting again straight out of the dryer. I know I feel stronger, more flexible, better. I'm going to need to tighten up the belt on my chaps again. 
...and jolly makes two of us.....
