Ah… you're back :grouphug:.

First few days at work have been uneventful - just training. But how very nice is it to be able to walk in the door after work, already having left the day behind. And how nice is it to come home after being OUT at work all day. After ten years of living/working at home, it's really nice.

Lindor don't stress about stepping on the scales. Maybe it's worth you setting different goals for a few months, and working on them, while ignoring the scales. If it were me and I was struggling to want to get on the scales, I wouldn't. I'd go and get a pedometer and set a goal of 5,000 steps a day - and do that for a month. If you want I could get you one and post it to you.

Or a goal of eating 3 cups of vegetables/fruit a day - just ONE small change to get your mind thinking about YOU again.

Don't give up on yourself matey. So many of us here look up to you as our inspiration, and we all understand what it means to lose focus and take a few steps in the other direction.

I'm doing OK at the moment but things have been up and down. I won't bore you with all the melodrama, but it's been a very interesting month. I'll tell you about it over coffee one of these days.

:)

Well done Amy on such a great loss :carrot:

Good to see you back Lindor. Don't worry about the scales, like Ani says, set some different goals and mix things up a bit and you'll be back on track in no time.

Yesterday was really good for me until I was leaving the gym and smashed the side of my car into a f***ing big pole :( the damage isn't massive but it'll still cost a few hundered to fix and I just can't afford that at the moment so it'll just have to stay as it is.

Very interesting reaction was that when I went into the supermarket just after it happened, I wanted to buy junk food and have a binge. I was quite surprised that I felt like that and I resisted the urge and carried on to have a pretty good night food wise. I guess that in the past I would have either smoked, drank or ate when feeling upset so it's pretty awesome to know that I can cope with bad things without doing any of those things.

Today's goals are to 1) stick to my points and 2) go to the gym tonight. Work has asked me to go back to Wellington to work 3 days next week and as I'm busting to meet my new nephew, I've accepted so I'll be heading up on Saturday afternoon and coming back on Thursday night.

That presents the problem of the fact that I tend to go so badly off track when my routine is upset so I'm going to write down a couple of goals for each day as I really want to stay on track while I'm away this time.


:twirly:

oh i am very sorry about your car .. what a SH*T . that would have made me want to binge too lol.. god on you for stopping yourself.. but im glad your gonna meet your little nephew :) That will be great . I dont have anything to suggest on your trip since i go no where lol.. But its seems to be a problem for everyone when away from home i spose you gotta be a little more leanient when your not at home with your gym and your own home cooking.. .

Ani im glad you feel happy with the leaving work at work.. i was kinda wondering if you would get bored in the evenings since work isn't there.. but you have said before you are still gonna write.. aren't you? I hope the boring and no weight helping training ends quickly .. i mean how hard can it be to work at bunnings? lol they training how to pick things up, how to water plants??? lol . I know oc health and safety and all that but still boring :).

Welcome back lindor , glad to see you.. If i were you i would do a full week of behaving before going anywhere near the scales :)

Im doing great been on track all week and exercised every day my cals have been perfect and im losing weight again.. :) cant complain at all ... for once.. LMAO.

Tonight is the easter fireworks at my local shops.. i have got the kids both having a sleep now so we can go up there later.. fireworks are at 9 pm .. so ill go up just prior.. IM cooking our dinner now to prevent the kids wanting anything when we are out.. Since 95% of bought stuff Lolly cant have.. lol.. anyway gonna go check my chook and veggies.. later girls

Thank you for the tips and encouragement Ani, Julie and Amy. And thanx for the offer of the pedometer Ani, but I did find one a few weeks back that I had scored as a freebee for something - a cornflakes box maybe!

I will apologise now for what I am sure is going to be a long, woeful and self pitying post, but we all have to vent at some point don't we? I guess I have reached that point.

See, I don't know where I am at with this weight loss thing anymore!! I've been thinking about it a lot lately - maybe too much - and basically, I just want to give the whole thing up now!

I have managed to reduce my weight by more than 20kg (30kg initially, but over the last 18 months I have slowly gained). I feel a whole lot better now than what I did at the very beginning - better than I ever expected to. I am proud of my efforts and I think I am content with how I feel.

In recent months however, I have been feeling really unsure of where I want to be with my weight loss. I have lost focus, I think that has become obvious to most? I don't know why I am doing it anymore. I'm not even sure I can even recall why I started it?

I read the posts of others here, you all seem to know what you want and why you want it. You want to lose weight for the family - to be able to be more active with your kids, for your health, to live longer, to be more active...etc. None of that really inspires me, but that is purely because of my situation. I have no children, and I don't get on with my family. I feel fit and healthy already and I rarely get sick. I see no direction in my life so therefore I don't care to live any longer than the time I am given. I have a very inactive life, but that is because I chose to be like that, not because I can't be active - I don't want to be able to run marathons, but I know I can walk to work and back, and I know I can run from a charging bull and climb over a fence or two in the process!

Despite wanting to give it up though, I can't stop thinking of weight loss. And it is that, that is getting me down right now! When I left for my holiday four weeks ago I told myself that I was going to relax with the dieting. That my holiday was my time to take it easy, relax and enjoy everything I can...including my meals whatever they were. But, even knowing that I had allowed myself that freedom, I could not get 'calories', 'kilos', 'pounds', 'weight', 'fat', 'slob', 'ugly', 'tight clothes' and all other words and phrases that I attack myself with, out of my head!!

And it depresses me to think that if I can't give up and somehow I do manage to reach goal and get to the point of maintaining, am I ever going to be able to push those thoughts way and live a life without them? Is the rest of my life going to be constantly thinking about weight loss? What I can eat, what I can't eat, what I should eat, what I shouldn't eat? I hate the way it is monopolising and controlling my thoughts now and I really don't know if I can take that mental torture forever!

I don't know if my ramblings are making any sense? I feel trapped in this weight loss journey! I want to fight on, but I can't do it, I keep failing...I want to quit, but my head won't let me. That is what is screwing with me at the moment!!

Before I started this, I never saw myself as having a weight 'problem'. Yes, I was 112kg and I felt I looked unattractive...but that was probably about all, ocassionally I was embarrassed that I had to squeeze into a seat or something. And I was disgusted with the quantity that I was eating. But I chose to diet to maybe make myself look better, and feel better about myself...but instead I have figured my mental image of myself is never going to be attractive despite what others may say!

I feel my weight is a bigger problem now!!! Because it is always the first thing in my mind from when I wake up and I can't seem to give myself a break from it! It is now that I seem constantly bothered by it. It is now it is being a problem!

And is it just me feeling like this? I am the only one left of the original Aussie Chicks, we rarely hear from Kathyhegg, Butter_Ball_No_More, and Leeny appears to have vanished totally? And what happened to Brit...and all the others? Have they been able to walk away from this without the mental beatings? Why can't I walk away from it? And will I ever be able to walk away from it even if I do reach goal?


I am starting to sound like a broken record now right? Again, I am sorry for this pathetic post. I'm just feeling totally frustrated with it all! :?:

the things you are finding frustratinbg, the things you should and shouldn't eat ect.. too me are a positive, before i didnt focus on it and i gained weight now i do focus on it . I constantly think about the weight lossw and on bad days i feel like you are now.. i jumped off the wagon for a whole moth and gained back a couple of kilos.. I know i have to stay focused and in staying focused im happy inmyself.. more confident about my choice and i stop calling myself names.. When im slacking off.. the whole.. nasty name thing starts singing in my head.. When i dont eat healthy i feel tired unwell and depressed .. and its not becuase i feel guilty i thin k its becuase my body isnt getting enough nutrients...

You have had a month or being diet free yet you continued to think abiout what you were doing.. i think that is great .. i think you being so focused will maintain what ever weight you choose in the end.. If you are happy with your current weight why dont you just maintain it for a while.. I see no poinbt pushing to be the sterotypical "IDEAL " weight .. I really think for me i will be happy to be somewhere in the 80-90kg range.. and once i am haqppy ideal or not i will stop and maintain..

The thing is i have not denyed myself anything in the process of losing weight.. i have had treats and enjoyed them.. but the difference is everything eaten is thought abaout .. and i believe learning to think aboiut it is the key to staying healthy for life :) ..

Lindor my very first thoughts after reading through your post were: are you depressed (and I mean clinically), or are you feeling trapped?

To me, the focus on your weight loss is a SYMPTOM of something, not the CAUSE of your current state of mind.

Losing weight and then keeping it off is one of the toughest personal challenges we go through. I suspect that the disappearance of so many original Aussie Chicks is due to relapse, or a feeling of failure - not in every case, but for some bizarre reason, most people only come in here when they're doing OK with their weight loss.

What's that about? A support group is MOST useful when people are struggling or losing interest, or putting weight back on. But at the same time, I know I tried to lose weight three times (thus my joining date here of 2004) before I found the way to do it.

For women like you and me who have neither partner or family to "do it for" the challenge to stay motivated and moving is tougher. Especially for the longer term.

Do you want to be eating a healthy diet? Or do you do it as a means to an end? Because if it's a means to an end and nothing more, once you go back to your normal way of eating… well, it's our "normal" pattern of eating that made us obese in the first place. And you know that - maybe it's one of the reasons why your mind is obsessing about kilos and calories.

And I understand what you say about the future. The only way to change that is to embrace "today", and to want to make this moment precious.

I know that it's tough. Where you live is tough. Where you work is tough. And not getting along with your family makes it harder. You have also just come back from holidays - and that makes you restless. Add to that the fact that you applied for that job, didn't get it… more feeling trapped.

Yes, losing 20kg is an awesome achievement - you and I both know that. It is life-changing! But where is the woman who had the motivation to drop even more? Where is the woman who was climbing Mt Everest? Have you seriously stopped wanting those things?

If it were me and I was feeling the way you do (and believe me, there have been plenty of times when I have felt that way), I would make some kind of drastic change. I'd move towns, states, countries, job… I would move mountains to find a positive reason to get out of bed in the morning.

As you know, I made some massive life changes in the past three months. MASSIVE! And even though things haven't settled yet, and are probably two months away from being so, I'm really pleased I've done it.

It got to a point for me where, after unwrapping all those layers of fat, the person I had become was not content with my life. Not at all. And the newer model of me was not suited to sitting on my @rse all day in front of a computer - or hiding away from the world. So I set myself a goal of working at Bunnings (to the horror of all my intellectual friends :D), and knocked back four job offers while waiting to hear if I would be successful.

Sometimes you just have to stand at the edge of your comfort zone, and take a leap of faith over to the wild side.

And I have to make mention of your comments about your health. Maybe you can leap tall buildings now - but you know from your work that it's cumultive damage. While you're in your 30's it's all good; your body will still cope well with the things you demand of it. But let me tell you from personal experience… get into your 40s and try and do the same thing with a fat body.

Not only does the beginning signs of perimenopause make it ten times harder to lose the weight, but the health risks you flirted with for too many years start to bite you on the bum. Do not wait until you get into your 40s to undo the damage, because I can't tell you how much harder it is to actually lose a kilo than it was ten years ago :dizzy:.

Matey I know I am waffling and I'm not sure if anything I have said is useful. You know where I am if you need to chat, and you know I'll do anything to help you.

I actually think a lot of women go through this. If you spend some time going through the other forums on 3FC you'll see heaps of women talking about how they lost heaps, left 3FC and regained the weight (and more), and now they're back to try again.

I think you're really brave for coming in here and talking about this. You're usually reticent about talking about your private self, but please stick around - even if you decide to not lose any more weight - because your humour, insight and contribution to our little team here is really valuable.

:hug:
Ani

Hugs Lindor. I can empathise with what u are going through. Though I have never been over 80kg, I'm guessing all the feelings we go through are very much the same. I started putting on the weight when I lost my mum to cancer. I don't talk to my family except one sister and thats not very often. My brothers - well.......... lets just leave that one alone. My other sister seems to have forgotten she has a family. My dad n mum divorced when I was 5, he never knew what a phone call or birthday was and still doesnt. He is so wrapped up in his games online that noone matrters unless they are cyber. I am the one who contacts them and its a pain in the ***. The youngest trying to hold it all together.

I have more to do with my cousin than the others.

If it makes you feel better I'm not doing the weight loss thing for my partner. He says I am fine the way I am and shows it, however I am doing it because
1: I find it uncomfortable and even painful to do something as simple as tie up my shoes. The blood rushes to my head and I can't breath properly.
2: For my chosen career I know I need to have some level of fitness which at the moment is very very low.
3: To be able to buy clothes that fit me - at the moment to fit me round they are WAY to long and the arm holes go halfway to my waist.
4: My health isn't that great
5: So I can do stuff with my kids
6: For my skin. My skin is very poor, and I know if I do not look after it now I am going to be one of these old people who suffer badly from tears and already I take a long time to heal. My skin has lost elasicity, is dry and thin and already I tear from a simple knock so easy.

Yes I find it hard also to be constantly thinking about waht I am eating. And I try not to. Maybe that is why it has taken me a year to lose only 8kg. But I know that I have educated myself in nutrition and health and know quite alot even if I don't always practice.

Maybe you could support others? Do you have a hobby that you enjoy? I'm sure there is something around out there for YOU that you can focus on and it may then take some of the focus off your weight. You may then feel less like 'whats the point' without actively thinking about it.

Vonni xxx

Amy thank you for your words, and I see what you are saying. Once upon a time I was proud of myself for knowing what I can and can't have. But, once you have been fighting this battle continuely for over two years, the mental beatings will get on top of you, you get sick for seeing food in it's components - the calories, the fat content etc.

Ani...thank you for your wonderful words of wisdom! Somehow you manage to make things clearer and simpler to understand.

I am feeling trapped in the weight loss process. You'd think after two years I'd be able to look and a food menu, or walk into a supermarket and automatically make the right choices without a second glance. But, no, it is still an on-going battle with my head. "I can get a packet of Tim Tams and just eat one" - "No! You know you don't stop at one" or "I am only at this restaurant today, surely I can have that greasy fish and chips" - "No! There are far less calories in that salad than that fish and chips!"

And maybe I have made it an obsession? Because, I am at the point of stopping myself from having that coffee in the evening because it will put me over my calorie budget. Or I won't have that piece of sugar-free chewing gum to make my mouth feel fresher because it might push my calories over my limit (yup all 1.5 cals of it!).

I am happy that I can stop myself from binging on crap. I have managed to control that and, apart from the ocassional slip, up I have learned to manage that. But I miss the days where I could go and pour myself a coffee without a second thought, where I could go and grab an apple and think this is yummy - did you know a large apple can have 125cals? 125cals!!! For something that is supposed to be good for you?? There are less calories in a Tim Tam!!!

Everything I reach for sparks a massive calculation of figures in my head. I don't enjoy food and eating anymore. I can see the good in that...but I don't see that I deserve to suffer for it. If I reach goal, I would like to be able to make the right choices and enjoy it with out having to think about it.

I hear what you say about the health implications too Ani...and I have to admit that you reminded me of another reason why I decided I had to lose the weight in the first place. My father was diagnosed with NIDDM and I knew that that, along with my obesity, put me at risk of the same thing in the future.

Although I say I want to give up this battle, and despite feeling as I do about it, I have managed to remain within my calorie budget and have kept up with my water since I returned from holiday. I stepped on the scales this morning, but alas the digital display was blank! Flat batteries I presume - and a blessing in disguise maybe???


So far as feeling trapped in life, well I think you know the answer to that Ani. I admire what you have managed to do over the last few months! And I only wish I had the courage to do something similar. And yes, being knocked back on that job application has set me back a step or six! It doesn't take much to blow the confidence right out of me...and that is what has happened. Top that with learning that my current workload has doubled while I was away as there was no cover for me in my absence. I feel like I am back at square one again! What is the point?

I am still not sure I am happy with my job, but I am not a quitter, and so long as I see a faint glimmer in the distance that one day I might actually realise I do enjoy it, I will continue to try to make myself do it. Maybe that is making me more miserable?

I am a stubborn git after all! Which, ultimately, is why I am still here I guess :lol:


Thankyou for taking the time and effort to respond to my woe.

Vonni, I missed your post...

...thankyou for your words too.

A 'distraction' would probably do me a world of good, but it is difficult to escape myself when I prefer to be on my own. I don't enjoy being around people - ironic really considering that attitude probably stems from my obesity and not liking my appearance (along with other things). Proof that losing the weight I have lost has had little impact on how I feel about myself?

:)

wow lindor .. please remeber you are an amazing person . and we care a great deal about you .. im sorry your old friends have left but we are here imbracing you . I just hope you will come to relise how special you really are . Hold you head up high and be proud of what you have achieved..

Ani and vonni are really insperational people and reading what they wrote put a frog in my throat.. its just shows how much they care about you.. I feel the same.. and though i havent known you for long it didn't take me long to find out how great you are.

We are here for you and each other a team in good and bad.. all in the wagon together and we will hold you here as long as we can drag you behind the wagon if we need to .. but be certain we wont let go .. we care tooi much to do that..
Ani is a wise lady and what she said about we leave when having trouble and she was right.. we feel like we are burdens when we are dragging behind .. we worry about failing our friends.. but we dont .. our friends are still there waiting for us.. and worrying about us when we are not around..

Well here we are your friend and we all just waiting to give you a big hug and tell you how much we care ..

Lindor I know how tough it is when it comes to food. How many calories can you eat a day and still lose weight? I have come to a point where I eat that piece of fruit, or have that extra cup of coffee, and I'm still able to lose weight.

Admittedly, since I stopped doing the magazine I have become a lot more active, and I burn off those extra calories. Today I ate chocolate - and definitely more than I should have, but this is how I spent my day:

• Emptying out the fishpond, scrubbing it clean, and filling it up (my fish love me for it).

• Doing a few loads of washing.

• Cleaning out the sunroom and vacuuming it.

• Filling up the wheelie bin with leaves and other garden rubbish.

• Moving several pot plants into the shade.

• Sweeping outside and tidying up.

It might not seem like a lot, but it kept me busy. According to my pedometer I also clocked more than 12,000 steps while pottering around.

Have you ever tried intuitive eating? It works for me if I keep hydrated - and I try to listen to what my body wants, and to work out when I am actually hungry. And I try to eat the best, yummiest food I can afford.

I still calorie count, and write down my calories every single day. Sometimes, like last Saturday, I spectacularly stuff up - but then I consider it a personal challenge to improve the next week after a bad one.

This is Week 85 for me and I fully understand what you say about being battle-weary. I reckon that for every week that I am feeling strong and motivated there is another week where I struggle to meet my calorie goals - and then about once a month I just don't give a stuff :D.

But I'm not undoing this good work, and I don't want you to either.

We are a team, us Aussie Chicks (well, that's how I see us). We're strong, smart, brave and vulnerable women - all with our individual strengths and weaknesses, and all REALLY willing to be each other's cheer-squad and mates.

You inspire me! There are things you've said, throughout this journey, that you don't even KNOW have had a big impact on me, but things that I often remind myself of when it all gets too hard.

And I know that people like Vonnie, Julia, Amy and Barb all really value you. And so does our friend who is currently residing in the good ole US of A!

Incidentally… shops are open tomorrow. I'm sure they sell batteries for scales :p.

OK, I need to go and have a shower. I've got bits of garden leaf in my hair :D

Hey Ani, I've gone back and reread everyones posts over the past couple of days and have learnt something. Hehehe you are writing articles in here :p
JK

lmao .. well ani is writer.. and me well i just like to hear myself speak.. lol well that is what my hubby says anyway.. good night..

Vonni, Amy, you are both right! I reckon Ani is our resident Aussie Chicks Agony Aunt! But, that is not to dismiss what you have both said. The three of you have picked me so much with your posts, and you have all given me a lot to think about. For which I am very grateful!

Ani, I am in no hurry for those batteries just yet - I am going to take the blank display on my scales as an omen! Maybe I am better off not knowing my weight just now? I want to give it a while before knowing what I weigh - the last two years has been spent focusing on the figures those scales produce. I want to break from that cycle for a while. I never wanted to be controlled by the scales and by strict calorie counting, but somehow I have let it happen and it has done my head in. That needs to stop!

For now, I will try to fight on, but I want to do that in a much less regimented manner than I have been. Intuitive eating sounds interesting, I might have to read more into it. But somehow I think I will need to fine tune my self-discipline a little more first!

I will continue with what I am doing now - keeping to a 1500 calorie budget with a +/-250cal margin (that's two extra apples or a few more cups of coffee!! :D) and drinking my water. When the weather starts to cool down again in a month or so, I'll start walking to work again. I might even pull out that pedometer I found and set myself a challenge of walking to some virtual destination.

Your description of your day had me pining for my house again Ani. I miss having a yard to play in. And I wonder if the incidental exercise I put in to my yard at my house - mowing the lawn once a week or so, sweeping the porches occasionally, weeding every now and then - was in fact having an effect on my weight-loss? Because, up until just before I had to move in November '06, I was still losing weight at a steady rate.

Ok, so now I am over my little mental crisis for now, I'll stop monopolising things here.

I want to know how you are all going. I have been away for three weeks, so to save me reading over something like 15 pages of posts, give me a brief run down of where you are all at? I know Gen has left to the USA, and I know Ani is under 80kg and is employed again! Surely there is more gossip??? :D

Agony Aunt? :eek:

Obviously I've been waffling too much, so how's this for the new, improved me? Stuffed my face with chocolate yesterday - paid for it on the scales today, so I'm going to have to walk 20km to work it off.

ALL my housemates are moving out this weekend! So I'll "cleanse" the house top to toe and that'll work off the choccie :D.

Lindor - get a house!

Vonni - :p

ohh ani i love your long posts :( ^^ that is just way to short :(( lol

im pleased this morning im down another 300grams which means i have lost 2 whole kilos this week :)
getting back on track was well worth it .. im very happy to be back on track .. im still a little above what i got down to before i jumped off the wagon last month .. but .. im happy to have lost in again :)

ok whats been going on kel has given us up for lent
julias sister had a baby boy .
ani started her job but still had problems with the old B*tch landlord
i jumped off the wagon for a whole month feeling like you are now... whats the point ( i was sick and feeling sorry for myself all of which is very helpful ) but got back on track at the begining of this week ..

i think that is alot of the gossip.. lol.. anyone esle think of anymore gossip?? lol

Amy congratulations - that's fantastic :carrot:!

Hmmm… gossip! I think you covered most of it - except for Julia's car accident. Barb has started a new program and it has been days since we heard from Gen.

Expecting Kel to bounce back in any day now. Hopefully without a thousand empty KFC and M&M wrappers in her trail :D.

I feel really low on energy today, and I'm not sure if I can be bothered working through all the things I had planned. Didn't sleep all that well last night, but I get my own bed back tonight so hopefully I will sleep 12 hours to make up for all these weeks of bad sleeps.

Yes I agree Ani - you need to start a weight loss website with inspirational blog. You can charge membership.

I have been busy, and not eating great yet! Our work weight loss challenge starts April 1st (fool's day, how appropriate... hehe), so i'm just aiming for that. I am DEFINITELY (!!) going to make it to join the gym in the next couple of days. Just haven't been able to get out of work on time this week, been super busy and now it's Easter and March Madness (college basketball tournament)... craziness!

Foster kitties are cute - pics here: http://galleries.joesdiner.com/gen/USA2008

In fact, there are pics of all sorts of things there, including one of me with a friend in New Jersey last weekend on our roadtrip to see a Live concert. Good times!

I have a busy couple of weeks coming up, with a conference trip to Boston soon.

My boss asked me if I'd entertain the idea of working in Hawaii for 3 months next year! That's a big **** YES haha. I am not a huge fan of the heat, but Hawaii looks so beautiful and I've never been there yet!

OK, it's 12:24am so I am going to finish this basketball game, add up my scores in the work tipping comp and go to bed - off to try and get my learner's permit tomorrow!

Ani, I hesitated about using the term Agony Aunt too. Your long posts are always helpful, insightful, easy to read and verrrry supportive - DON'T YOU DARE STOP THEM!! :p

Gen, US sounds like the change you needed. You sound excited, happy and full of 'get up and go'. With all that you have done since being there, and that you sound settled already, it is hard to believe it was only a little while ago that you were still waiting for the date that you were going!

And, WOW for the three months in Hawaii! That sounds awesome!

Cute kittens too ;)

Now, tell me Julias car accident was the one she mentioned recently about hitting a pole? Or is the gossip in fact another accident??

The damage from the pole reminded me of a vehicle I saw in Perth recently. This vehicle had obviously experienced a similar accident and had a huge dent and extensive scratches along the rear fender. The owner, possibly knowing it might take a while to repair, 'patched' the damage up with bandaids and put a sticker near it with the word 'OUCHIE'.

Congrats on becoming an Aunt Julia! :)

I can't help but wonder how anyone could possibly give up their internet for 40 days for any reason! I admire Kels ability! I struggled at three weeks! Looking forward to hearing from Kel soon!

I am curious about Barbs new program???

Amy, well done for finding the strength to jump back on the wagon. I know how hard it is to do that particularly when there is still a way to go (Heck! Does it get easier at any point??). And well done on your efforts so far!

Ani, I hope you are enjoying your housemate freedom! Is that it now for you? No more housemates?


I am still on the wagon, and sticking to my not so strict calorie budget. I go back to work on Tuesday and my biggest concern about that at the moment, is whether I can still fit into my work uniforms. With the weight I lost before going away, I was just starting to feel comfortable in them again!

Still no scales...and still quite happy with that :lol:

I've had a lazy weekend, finished reading one book and halfway through the next! And Ani, I have actually put in a request to be moved to another flat (same complex) that has an outdoor sitting area, fish pond and a nice little yard! Hopefully will know in the next month or two if I do get to move - keep your fingers crossed for me!!!

Hope everyone else is enjoying their Easter break! :)

I ate way to much chocolate today and I think the scales will show it tomorrow. The past few days have been crap emotionally and eating wise so...... Tomorrow is another beginning for me and going to be more strict with myself. I have been a little to lax lately.

Vonni

PS - but the chocolate was good :D

Gen! Good to hear from you, I had a look at the photos and it seems like you're settling in over there and really enjoying yourself. Good luck with the challenge at work… April Fool or not, you go girl!

Vonni what's wrong? Why are you having emotional troubles? Of course you can tell me to mind my own business, but here's a :hug: from me.

Lindor it sounds like you're figuring things out. I think that finding balance is important - the scales are no more important than any other aspect of life. To me they're a tool, but they'll NEVER be my master.

I decided to rearrange all my furniture today - including six bookshelves full of books. WELL! I've been here almost six weeks, I was bored with how things looked :D. Actually it's not unusual for me when I first move. When you first arrive you get the removalists to plonk things down where they seem to fit - or where it appears to make sense. But after you've lived in a place for a few weeks you realise that your home would be in better 'harmony' if you just made a few adjustments ;).

And then I had to google how to feng shui my bedroom :D. Yes, I know - I'm different…

Anyway, must go and do a little more before bedtime. Here's to a good post-Easter weigh-in :).

:easter::egg::easter2::easter3::bunny2::bunny::eas ter2::easter3::easter:


since it only comes once a year i thought is go nuts... lol,


HAPPY EASTER GIRLS :joker::grouphug:

We had a great day .. i actually got through easter sunday with less then 2000 calories lol im amazed.. and that was my only goal for today and i achieved it..

Considering w had a huge dinner .. Silv put on the whole traditional english dinner ... raost veg, cauli cheese, ham and turkey, stuffing.. yorkshire puddings.. , gravy , brusel srouts honey carrots... lol it was all there ...but fortunatly for me.. she didnt serve it up she left it all self serve.. so i did really well .. the extra cals.. actually came from the choclate i ate.. lol .. yeah i know.. bad me.. but too bad.. it was easter sunday.. lmao..

The kids had an absolute ball .. they ate heaps thn spent the rest of the afternoon in the pool .. i put them to bed at 6.30 onkly to have cameron get up at 7 30 screaming in pain from an earache.. I have called a doctor to come out and its now .. 10.45 and im still waiting for the doctor.. lol.. Cameron finally went to sleep at 9.30 crying.. .. i have him in a sitting up postition on about 8 pillows.. laying down made it worse for him.. i hope the doc comes soon .. i want to go to bed.. but with everything closed tomorrow i'll wait i dont fancy waiting 3-4 hours at the hospital instead in the morning..

so hooray for me.. and hooray to another bad nights sleep... lol ..

I will stop maoning now.. im just tired.. our day was fabulous .. great poeple .. great food and great fun.. cya girls later..

Amy how long did you end up waiting for the doctor? How's things this morning?

I had a good weigh-in (considering it's Easter :D) and dropped 0.4kg. I'm happy with that.

This week I'll be working Tuesday - Thursday, then have two days off and back into it on Sunday so hopefully that will help with my 'incidental exercise'… all that walking up and down those big aisles at Bunnings and serving my lovely customers, unpacking plants, stacking things on shelves etc.

My goal for this week is really to just take things one day at a time, and to figure out a routine. It's all going to be rather strange and new for me, so I don't want to put extra pressure on myself.

I really want to get close to 78kg by next week's weigh-in, so I need to keep that in the front of my mind.

Sadly Lindor I won't be housemate-free. Rent is too expensive here, and I have someone moving in here on Saturday. She's a teacher in her 40s who seems really conservative - and she values her privacy and her work. So hopefully I won't notice her around much. HOPEFULLY!

Today I'm going to rearrange the furniture in the rooms I missed yesterday, and then go to Freo for a wander. I need to find a supermarket that's open, and I also want to do something relaxing on my last day off.

Good luck for anyone else weighing in today.

:)
Ani

Ani, you need someone like my housemate. She's annoying as **** when she's here (really loud talker and never shuts up) although she's nice, but the best thing is - she's hardly ever here! I honestly see her about 2-3 times a week. She works fulltime (later than me) so I'm gone before she gets up. Then she does babysitting a couple nights, sees the boyfriend most days/nights and also is in a singing group.

It's great!

the doctor came at midnight and said both Cams ears are infected .. lol YYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAWWWWNN.. lol Cam is feeling fine today until he lays down and then he starts to cry again.. poor kid.. ill have to do a run around for an open chemist .. and dont know if he will go to school or not.. tomorrow.. but at this stage if the poor kid cant sleep i cant see him going to school either.

well done on the weight loss ani.. :). lol i started this post over an hour ago forgot about it becuase i had a phone call from a friend telling me the chemist on the main raod was open.. so i threw on my clothes and ran down there forgetting about this post.. hehehe

Well my weigh in was crap as I had thought. Up nearly a kilo, but hopefully it'll even out by the end of the week. As I have said before I weigh daily to get a feel, and I have been on average around 300gm up all week so hoping it jumps down again by next week. Ani well done on yr drop and Amy well done on control yesterday.

Ani no more probs than usual but they finally seem to be getting on top of me cause I am drained from the constant battles.

Just child troubles and partner problems. I think half the child troubles stem from the man troubles. Long story, but in a nutshell I have a very moody partner takes everything to heart, reads between the lines on comments made and takes offence easy, wants sex to often (I'm over that) and crabs it when he doesnt get it. Also is very pessimistic and materialistic and fights with my 13 yr old CONSTANTLY. And I have the x now being a prat trying to reduce child support when his new estimate was $40 less a fortnight anyway. He's trying to say he DOES have my kids every 2 weeks but in reality the 7 yr old goes 3 nights a month and the other night she is at her grandmas or auntys. He is trying to claim that night so he goes over the percentage of care so its reduces dollars. What he pays now doesnt even quarter cover real costs so................. At least he is not disputing the 13yr old. He won't go and hasnt for months. Hates it there. But I have to get statements from people to say when I have them otherwise they take his word for it. Not fair that I am the one who has the kids and he can lie and get away with it. And he gets his family and his new wifes family to lie for them. I don't want to ask friends for statements as it is putting them in the middle, but by not doing so it helps him get what he wants. I think he will eventually try for custody of the 7yr old and I have said over my dead body and I mean it.

Enuf bout my crap anyhow.

How did everyone elese go with weigh in... eeekkkk at easter.

Vonni

Amy I hope cam gets better soon. I think earaches are one of the worst pains you can get. That and toothache. Give him a hug from von xxx

Agree, sympathies to Cam - I had an earache for the first time last year and it sucked!

I have not stopped eating all day today. Oh joyous uterus spasms... fortunately it coincided with easter so I had an excuse to stuff my head with chocolate.

so much for being a new beginning. I ate another lindt white chocolate bunny, a mini packet of burger rings, a caramel iceblock, a triple choc muffin and my breakfast (i think) and dinner. And another crap day.

Vonni.

Lindt white choclate bunnies ...... YUM!! :T

It's sure been busy here over the past few days! Lindor I hope you're feeling better about things. I think that we all go through times where it all feels like too much effort. I wonder if maybe you should try something different from calorie counting for a while?

I love your story about the car you saw with an "ouchie" :lol: I should do that to mine because I'm not planning on fixing it any time soon. It was only a couple of months ago that I had the front of it panelbeaten after driving into a pole. Doh!

Love the photos Gen - nice ones of you and the kitties are super cute! Love the one in the sink. Have you seen the websites catsinsinks.com? Very funny. Sounds like things are going well which is great to hear. Hawaii would be an awesome opportunity too!

I've been in Wellington since Saturday and have had a lovely time with everyone. My new nephew is cute as a button and is very good at eating and sleeping if nothing else. No name yet but whatever they pick is sure to be unusual.

Counting points is completely out the window while I'm away from home and excercise is minimal so I'll be happy if I manage to maintain while I'm away. Diet hasn't been too badly out of control but I do have to admit to eating quite a lot of crackers with cheese and pate over the weekend.

Goal from now until I go home on Thursday night is to watch my food intake.


:twirly:

guess what?

JEMIMA IS WALKING

in other news i stuck to my internet ban (i allowed myself email and that is all) once JUST ONCE i hopped on ebay to find the name of a book i wanted to buy a friend, 2 minutes if that! so that is pretty good considering i have/had interenet addiction

i also didnt really weigh myself all month,
i had a peak the last week or so and i am wavering around 84.8kg - this is for a couple of reasons, NOT m&ms (heheehe ani) but leftovers from jemima's party and me just basically NOT caring at all and not trying to maintain or lose weight - bad bad bad

I have been in weird mindframes all month, still not sure where i am at, staying the same and eating to lose weight is what is going on
shakes for breakfast if i dont feel like toast or cereal or if i dont have time - treating them like an up and go alternative
been having salad sandwiches and stuff like that you know healthy good food and since been doing that been feeling healthier etc

shakes do work but only if you gradually come off them - i went from shakes to food cold turkey - doesnt work that way - but still would do shakes diet again

julia - i am coming to nz forholiday in a month woo hoo

benji so funny - and surprising - he wants to eat all the easter stuff we got really fast so it is out of the house... that is SO SO SO me mindframe thing to do!!! so needless to say i am helping him in his quest!

having red rooster for lunch coz it is accross the road and i have to keep my 2 slices of bread for jemima! (NObody remind me that the servo next door to redrooster sells bread)

sorry if you think it is rude but i didnt stop and read all of the 25 pages i had missed - ok that exaggeration but close

ani - how you doin?
gen - how exiting look at your profile "miss pittsburgh" that is so cool
rennysue - hi
lindor - internet ban was interesting, i think the weirdest bit was when i NEEDED it for things like movie times or phone numbers, (got my friends to do the movie times) but looked up the old fashion whitepages for numbers and refidex instead of where is..... i got benji to pay bills with internet banking and just crawled up in a ball and got the shakes when i had withdrawels from facebook.... (which now i am back on i think i can definately live without)
just logged on to baby forum i am on and maybe will go back once a week....
however wondering if i have put on more weight than i would have if i had had the support of all you guys...... so will be around but i have made some big restrictions
i have to be off the computer and hopefully close to going to bed by 10.30 every night...... used to be on until midnight miniumum etc
vonni - family is so frustrating, it sucks when you have to pretend you dont have support and battle on by yourself when you can see support in the house..... do you know what i mean? i have a friend with a 10week old bub about to leave her partner coz he doesnt help her.....


HI HI HI HI everyone

hey barb and amy!

MWAH
my baby awake now so i best go get her out of her pjs and marvel in her walking!

Its raining here!! It hasn’t rained since December!

So much has been happening in the last few weeks here I haven’t been posting.

My dad had a heart attack two weeks ago and needed bypass surgery. He’s doing so well that he’s coming home today, five days after his surgery. He’s apparently breaking records at the hospital. Thank goodness he’s fit and generally healthy.

The programme I’m currently doing is called Bodyslim. It’s basically eating three meals and three protein only snacks and doing incidental exercise, they recommend 10,000 steps a day. Oh and no calorie counting or weighing food! That’s all! I’ve been on it now for 8 days and have lost 2.1kg. I’m not hungry and I have no cravings for anything. Sunday was my free day (you have one day a week where you can eat whatever you like) so I had a hot cross bun for brekkie and ate a couple of chockies through the day. It’s so easy to follow so if anyone want’s more info pm me and we can sort something out.


Lindor don’t give up now, you’ve come such a long way. I think we’ve all been at the place your at now so can really sympathise with the way your feeling. Is there a counsellor you can go and see, maybe talking to someone will help you to find what’s keeping you from reaching your goals. I know myself all that mental bashing can really get way too much to bare and giving up is the easy way out. Keeping up with all the posts on 3fc, even if I don’t post myself, keeps me sane. Just seeing that I’m not the only one going through all of this crap helps so much. I really don’t believe you succeed if you take this journey for someone else. My reasons have always been to keep my family happy, to be able to keep up with my kids, to get my doctor off my back………..but none of these reasons have helped me to stay on track. Now it’s my turn to take care of me. If I do this then everything else will follow, know what I mean? I think I’m dribbling on a bit now!

I hope everyone had a nice Easter. I’m going out to enjoy the rain! :dancer: After 14 days of hot hot weather this is sooo nice!

XX
Barb

its not raining here my friend in modbury said it been raining on anf off all day but not a single drop here :(( IM GONNA CRY.... lol im only 40 minutes drive form her heheheh..

Great to see you 2 back and glad to hear you are doing ok..

you got your work cut out for you now with jem walking... she is gonna get into everything..... buts it sure is cute when they are so happy with themselves walking along.

Cameron is still sore and isnt at school today .. i doubt he will go this week .. since he needs to take the anitbiotics and the school wont give them out.
anyway better go make these kiddies some lunch they are hungry and been asking since 11..

btw its mid day here and we are all still in our pj's lol...

There's nothing wrong with spending the day in your jim jams! :)

way to go Amy being in PJs still. I love days I don't HAVE to be anywhere and can be in my PJ's.

Kel welcome back woohooooo. We missed you, and cool stuff Jem is walking. Barb welcome back here for you to, where did you disappear to? You and Kel in cahoots? hehee.

barb that diet (eek I swore) sounds great. But I don't snack much, so would have to push myself to do it properly. I'd love more info.

Gotta fly. Have a son home who is MEANT to be at school but I busted working. he left home in his school clothes grrrr. Have an assignment due YESTERDAY. and have to start work in an hour. (don't know where I'm gonna put the son while working but he refuses to go school. I rang the welfare officer at school and he had a chat to the boy)

Vonni

I had a quiet day today Camerons ear still hurts so he has spent all day on the couch in his pjs...... omg.. i cant belaive it ..... its actually raining.... wow i dont think it has rained since november last year.. yippee whats left or my garden might actually survive... .. oops back on task lol Cam spent all day on the couch watching tv in his pjs.. Leah has spent most of the day playing in her bedroom .. and i have been washing my floors tidying up the toys and sorting out washing.... I also managed to get a 45 minute 9 km workout on the elliptical .. and im pretty pleased with that my cals for today are 1764..

Leah just called Cameron and asked hi what is making that funny noise.... hahahha .. Cameron told her.. its actually raining Lolly .. lol... its already slowing down.. omg 3 minutes of rain and its gonna stop.. that is sad.. i hope it starts again.

Vonni what did you end up doing with your school wagger when you went to work?

the kids stayed in there jammies all day i got dressed just after i got off the boards earlier.. before i made lunch :) lol .. well im gonna go and have a shower b4 hubby gets online for a chat ..

I just got back from my first full day at work. According to my pedometer I walked 10.4km AT WORK today :eek:. Not to mention the stairs I climbed up and down half a dozen times, or the fact that I did all those kms in heavy steel cap boots!

KEL! Welcome back :).

Barb - woo hoo on the weight loss :carrot:. Congratulations!

I really want to reply to your post from yesterday Vonni but I am stuffed!

Don't think I'll have too much trouble dropping the next kilo before the end of April if I keep this walking up… it's insane!

But I really loved it :D

Gosh Ani you must be looking SOOOOOOOO good is it photo time yet?

i have had a cleaner in my house the last two tuesdays, not to clean as such but to teach me what to do (i think she figured that out this week) I dont know how i have managed to survive this long with having no idea about housework, my parents were both in the army so kept a very clean house - it all just happened, i know how to iron and the basics but the nitty gritty just got done....
today though i wasnt in the mood and we cleaned out my pantry instead and cleaned the couches, soon it will be all clean and when jemima is napping i will maintain it - thats the plan anyway - and that in a round a bout type of way is going to help me stick to my weight loss as organised cupboard and fridge and mealplans is one thing i think i have been missing

benji out getting haircut tonight, so i best get stuck into the cleaning i didnt do with the cleaner today.... heheheehe
after biggest loser

heaps better this year as they have been more educational i reckon, am so glad they got rid of sheridan and very glad JJ got rid of himself....
ani are you still watching and hating it?

ps - i really should weigh myself.... i think i will on Monday then see what i can do for the 3 weeks before my NZ holiday.... holiday will be interesting in terms of weightloss as it will be maybe 3 weeks in a car.... hmmmm

Welcome back Kel. That's exciting that you're coming to NZ. Where are you going to be?

Great to hear that you enjoyed your first full day of work Ani :D I bet that you'll get a big boost in your weight loss with this new job. You'll be active in a totally different way to the usual and the weight will probably fall off you.

I had a nice night last night, the baby did more sleeping and drinking and is just cute as a button.

Goal for today: eat well.

Have a good one everybody!


:twirly: