What do I do about my husband!!! - 3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

RealtorRose · 02-01-2004, 11:15 PM

I finally found a diet I can handle except my husband is not on board.

I want to lose 15 lbs and he sure could stand to lose 15 himself. I have tried to encourage him to slim down with me but he just won't give up his carbs and heavens forbid he passes up a dessert

He eats a huge bowl of ice cream almost evey night and sometimes piealamode. Cooking is always a challenge because I have to make him his potatoes, pasta and other no-no's that I can't have.

So far I have done amazingly well under the circumstances. Any hints from you gals. I messed up this weekend and ate pasta on Saturday night and a big cookie on Sunday. I wish he was more supportive. Sure glad I found this site.

Rose

chazmom · 02-01-2004, 11:30 PM

Sorry Rose, I guess I am alot meaner than you are

Everyone in my house is eating what I eat. I do make the kiddos some corn, or another veggie to go with their dinner since they are not big on some of the things I like. No bread at dinner, and DH is eating what I eat too. I figure if he doesn't like it, he knows where the kitchen is

I will buy the kids cookies for their lunches and some snacky sweet things here and there, but I am not buying DH the Godiva chocolate ice cream he loves.......

He is being really good, he knows he needs to lose some weight, as do I. So no problems yet...He is just happy I am cooking!!!

He got up early this morning, before me, and made him and the kids pancakes and had everything cleaned up before I came downstairs....mmmmmm...pancakes....I had turkey bacon!

I guess what I would do is go to another room while he is eating his ice cream, or get you a nice bowl of strawberries with some FF cool whip and eat yours with him. But I would not go out of my way to cook extra foods for him. Again, that is me

Good Luck!!!

clovey · 02-02-2004, 05:45 AM

Me too - I am with Chazmom here - he knows where the kitchen is. I reckon that the cook gets to decide what is on the menu. Is there a carb that he loves that you can take it or leave it? If so, you could get lots of this. I was saying the other day on the board here that I dislike donuts so bought loads when I started the SB, so no one in the house really noticed they were having cabbage and chicken every night....

It does sound a bit harsh to say 'well tough' to him, but he needs to be more supportive of you. I reckon. You could ask him why he is wanting to sabotage your weight loss efforts. That would flush it out.

Maybe someone later will come up with a more husband focussed approach than Chazmom and I, but till then.........

dont let him push you around.

sflake · 02-02-2004, 10:16 AM

Me three!! Eat what I cook & buy or feel free to do your own thing! DH is kind and only brings home snacks he knows I do not like, any thing else he eats away from the house. He really does not need to lose any weight. My sister who lives with us has lost weight by default. Not really planning to lose but just ate what was prepared and is now on board with the plan!

little chick · 02-02-2004, 10:29 AM

Me four. Although this time around my DH has decided to join me. And for the kids they go through the "THERE IS NOTHING TO EAT IN THIS HOUSE" every few days but they to are getting used to it. I do buy a few snack things the kids like for lunches and things but only the stuff I don't like. I figure that if I am not healthy then I won't be around long enough to look after them. So put up with it. Good luck. A grumpy Hubby is not a fun one.

Bamiegurl · 02-02-2004, 10:29 AM

I do not cook different for my dh. My kids will ask if they can have something different and I tell them yes if you fix it yourself. My dh eats icecream every night he had my dd bake a cake Thursday knowing i was coming home Friday. They should have done that Mon. When I left and had it ate by the time I got home. Got up and fixed biscuits 'n gravy Sun. mornin which is one of my favorites. Not to mention he ate the last of the eggs! So no I will not fix him anything special. He would eat pasta everyday if I fixed it. Just Stay In It and be strong!

pebbles396 · 02-02-2004, 01:16 PM

I suggest tricking your husband. Buy LeCarb ice cream, or Skinny Cow bars. Maybe he won't notice.

We went to the extent to clear the cupboards out of everything that is illegal. All pasta, potatoes, stuff like that. It is hidden in the basement. We donated everything that wasn't already open, and gave away four large bags of food.

I ask the if my DH cheats (which he hasn't yet) he do it on lunch at work. I tell him to have his pizza then. The recipes on this diet are really great - maybe you can convert the DH. Make the pistacio chicken, broccoli (throw some cheese on his), and serve a great salad (put blue cheese and nuts on his).

I do congratulate you for doing well - I just found that having all distractions gone has been the saver for us.

RealtorRose · 02-02-2004, 02:54 PM

Hi Friends,

Thanks so much for your replies. I can see that I have to change my cooking attitude a bit. Fortunately for me I am not crazy about ice cream so of all the desserts to keep in the house, ice cream is probably the best.

In all fairness to my DH,

I prepare the meals but he does do the dishes and cleans up the kitchen. Do you suppose if I stop preparing his potatoes & pasta that he will stop doing my dishes!!! I really do not want to start a war.
I have been utilizing all the cookbooks and recipies that I find on line to add some variety to our dinners which has been terrific. Where do I find the recipt for pistachio chicken...sounds yummy

Anyway it's Monday morning and I'm back on track.

Rose

pebbles396 · 02-02-2004, 04:07 PM

Rose - I got it from the book, PM me if you didn't buy the #1 Best selling book on the NY times list. ha ha ha. I'd be more than happy to send it to you.

As for this husband. Mine always cleans up dinner. Actually, he comes home and empties the dishwasher, and I clean. Then he cleans after we're finished. This was part of the getting married thing, I wasn't going to clean because I hate it. And he made me get rid of the housekeeper b/c it was expensive so he's doing the Mr. Clean work.

Maybe you could convince you DH that pototes don't exist. That it's really a lie, and it's all been a dream.

I plan to use this same tactic when our (unborn) children want to go to disney world....... It just doesn't exist!

little chick · 02-02-2004, 08:59 PM

Rose try only cooking enough potatoes for him and you fill up on the leagal stuff. Might work.

RealtorRose · 02-03-2004, 08:41 PM

Hey Pebbles,

Could you send me the recipe for pistachio chicken. I thought I've checked out all the current cook books...which one did I miss?

I have been gathering all kinds of new recipes so my cooking doesn't get boring.

Rose

Ruthxxx · 02-08-2004, 10:35 AM

I will split off this recipe and put it in the Recipe Sub-Forum. I believe it's in the SBD Book too.

luckyredlisa · 02-08-2004, 02:27 PM

Rose,

Admittedly, I'm not married, and therefore don't understand all the politics of cooking vs cleanup. But, what if you make SBD legal recipes, as the others suggested, and then just put some pasta/potatoes/rice under them for him? If you keep them simple, those things ARE pretty easy to cook, especially if you're not cleaning up the extra dirty pan!!

Beans are a good one, too. That crockpot chili doesn't seem a bit dietetic. Throw some rice under it, top it with cheese, and it becomes downright manly!

And if you use the reduced fat, not the fat free, cheese, he probably won't even notice!!

And what about those frozen rolls that you can just make one at a time? Pop a couple in the toaster oven for him to accompany the SBD legal main meal.

Plus I'm sure there are a lot of your "usual" recipes that can be slightly adjusted for SB? That's another way to trick him and reduce your cooking workload.

I do agree with the ladies, he needs to be supportive AND help out. I can't beleive the feminist in me is advising you to stay in the kitchen and keep your mouth shut. But on the other hand-is the 2 minutes of extra work created by boiling water for pasta or potatoes really worth the war?

This can be done! And once he starts to notice how hot and healthy you're looking, he may be asking for an extra helping of greens, too!!

Jennie527 · 02-09-2004, 01:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by little chick

Rose try only cooking enough potatoes for him and you fill up on the leagal stuff. Might work.

This exactly what I do for my DH! When I make something like chili or the smoked chicken/black bean soup I got from the recipe section (Mmmm its good) I make 1 serving of rice to pour the soup/chili over for my dh. Or I make 1 serving of pasta with the chicken/veggie dishes for him to have with his. And you don't have to do this everyday. Buy the frozen texas toast to go with some meals and just make 1 piece. If he wants another they only take 5 min in the oven. HE can throw another one in. I have a hard time with not drinking soda that's in the house. I buy sodas for my hubby, but only the kinds I don't like. You can do it. If he gets irritated. Explain to him how important this is to you (without putting him on the defensive) and that you are/will try harder to accomodate his likes/dislikes as best you can, but that making large amounts of food you're not supposed to be eating is just too hard. And that more than anything you really need his support because you can't do it without him. Put the ball in his court. Good Luck!

RealtorRose · 02-14-2004, 12:13 AM

Hi Luckyredlisa & Jennie,

Thanks. I have been making single portions of pasta/potatoes/bread for him and guess will continue. Things could be worse. It's really only at dinner....he is on his own for breakfast and lunch.

Rose