Any plan that entails eventually discontinuing the new habits, is going to have a failure rate of virtually 100%. Does that mean you'll never eat off plan? I don't know, can you say that now? That you never, ever, ever make a choice that you consider less than perfect?
Sugar makes me sick in several ways, and I've known this for a long time. It's still hard to resist sometimes, but the less I eat it, the sicker I get when I do, and I end up asking myself "why did I want to do this to myself?"
I mean, no matter how good a food looked, or how good I knew it tasted, if I was told it contained rat poison, I can't imagine that I would eat it, and yet I forget how poisonous sugar is to me. And poison really is a good analogy, because I feel physically ill after eating a significant amount of sugar (and not just "icky" as in guilty, but physically nauseous, achey and often with a killer headache and hungrier for more of the stuff I know will only make it worse).
I mean, if somebody said "here, I'll give you this candybar, but if you eat it, I'm going to punch you in the gut and hit you over the head," I wouldn't take the candybar - and yet every once in a while I continue to strike this exact same deal with myself.
I did it tonight at MILs. We celebrated our Christmas there tonight, and I did very well before dinner avoiding the cookie tray, and I did very well during the meal (even turned down the roll and sugary cranberry sauce), and then came pie. I was prepared for the cookie tray (assuming it was meant as dessert), but not for the freshly baked (Marie Callendar) raspberry blackberry pie. Even when " freshly baked pie" was announced as dessert, I thought "Great!" because there really is only a couple baked pies that I find at all tempting. I hate cherry, and most apple pies (except Dutch Apple, served hot with ice cream - any component missing and I can't stand it. Pie cold? or No icecream? Yucky). So I was confident I could resist - and what does it turn out to be blackberry raspberry.
So I said "no" - No wait, I thought No! What I ended up saying was "cut me the smallest slice you can."
As far as pie disasters go, it was a pretty small one. MIL didn't cut the pie, her hubby did (which was good - he actually followed instructions and cut a very small piece). But I definitely would have felt better physically and mentally if I'd held my ground, especially because the sugar made it that much harder to resist the cookie tray. I swear those cookies were mocking me - and the fudge, well as anyone knows fudge can leap off a tray and force itself past your lips and down your throat - And a small piece did just that!! Luckily it was mint (blech) and I was able to fight off the rest.
Sugar is my enemy, and I have to remember that. In many ways, for me and many people, sugar seems less like a food and more like a dangerous and highly addictive drug. And I wonder how successful a heroine addict would be in staying clean, if heroine were as easily accessible and as intensely pushed by friend, family, and stranger to the degree that sugar is. Cheap, often even free with mom, grandma and sunday school teacher pushing it on us from the earliest age and at every opportunity. "Just a little won't hurt".... "you can go back on the wagon tomorrow"... but I bought/made it just for you (accompanied by hurt expression"... "but it's Christmas, your birthday, Arbor Day....
I know that I probably will not succeed at complete abstinence from sugar (especially since it's hidden in so many things - can you imagine how we would react if we learned that heroine was hidden in all the places sugar is - but don't worry, it's just in small amounts), and because sugar IS everywhere I probably will slip, but I think that I have to think of it like heroine.
Would I intentionally plan a heroine binge?
As a person whose only illegal substance use was alcohol at a grand whopping total of three college parties - and sips of my parents drinks with my parents permission - and at the time, even that was legal, I can say a definite "no" on that one.
And while I'm darned lucky (maybe) that sugar is not illegal, I think I will have to look at sugar differently for the rest of my life.
Any diet that doesn't leave a little "playing room" is doomed for failure. The key is knowing where to set your limits, and then climbing right back on the wagon again.
kaplods: what a tale! I have been there and done that, but usually not as good as you. I think you handled yourself really well, considering the circumstances. I would not have been able to avoid the cookie/fudge tray after the pie. I wouldn't have avoided the pie, either. But you know what I would do next time I went to dinner at MIL's? I'd bring my own sugar free dessert alternative, whether you make or buy something, so that you can have a treat too, and not trigger the addict demons lurking below the surface. It IS like heroin.
I usually bring dessert alternatives, when possible, and I don't feel wierd or guilty about it. Other people tend to consider their own eating habits in a new light after they see me or my other SB friend eating or discussing meals. This thanksgiving, I made a regular pumpkin pie, and a sf one. it turned out that one of the guests at my cousin's house was diabetic, and so my sf pie was greatly appreciated!
anyway, you did awesome, got to enjoy a small indulgence, and aside from a little guilt, you seem no worse for the wear. back on plan until next time...
Athena! Please forgive me for not reading everyone's response, so disregard this if it's already been covered.
You definitely can do this for life. Giving up sugar is hard at first, but when you realize how much it ran your life, it's not as hard anymore. Really. Living without the cravings is PHENOMENAL and you realize how much of life you were missing because of your food obsession. At least that's my experience.
Doing it for life doesn't mean that you can't have planned "off plan" days. But it does mean you'll have to do Phase 1 for 3-5 days after each time you go off plan. It dissuades you from doing it often (which is good!). I've gone off plan each time I've traveled in Europe and for a few special occasions over the years. Sometimes I gain some weight, but it always comes off when I get back on plan.
However, you cannot plan on adding sugar back into your life at some point. It will, at least in my exerience and knowledge, always be a problem for you in the future if it was a problem in the past. But you can make SF versions of practically anything (especially easy stuff like pumpkin pie! Check out the deeeeelicious pumpkin ginger tart in the holiday dessert recipes thread!). I didn't think I could live without sugar when I started SBD 4 years ago. I never dreamed I could be this happy without it, but I so am.
Baristamon, I did make a fairly good choice (or at least made a less terrible one), but I definitely want to clarify that this wasn't exactly typical of my choices, especially most of my life. So when you say you usually don't do as well - neither do I. It was a victory moment.
And I'm not really suffering any guilt. Guilt has screwed me up so often in the past, that my number one rule in my food plan has been absolutely no guilt. It's like forgetting to floss, I don't feel guilty for it, I just get right back to doing it as soon as I can. But, getting a sugar hangover does remind me that I made a careless and not so smart choice.
The funniest thing is that desserts usually aren't a big temptation for me. It's weird to have a sweet tooth, but not a sweet tooth for sweets. I can turn down pie faster than I can turn down pulled pork barbecue, Empress shrimp or Sweet and sour chicken. Even though those dishes probably have as much sugar hiding in plain sight as many desserts. I just got caught up in the momemt because I hadn't prepared for a temptation I didn't see coming (but definitely should have).
A lot of eating behavior is only semi-conscious, and I think those are often the behaviors that are the hardest to change. It's the "auto-pilot," behaviors that take a little extra effort to overcome. I was chatting, and got caught up in the conversation, and I just didn't take enough time to THINK about it.
But even with desserts not usually being tempting to me, if I HAD taken my own dessert, I probably would have eaten that instead - just because I had planned for the situation to come up. Or even if I had planned for it (what WILL I do, if the dessert is tempting), I probably would have done better.
I'm not worrying too much about it - after all I've been able to keep my weight under control (if not descending), and at this time of year that's pretty unusual for me. Usually from about Thanksgiving (or many years Halloween) to New Years day, has been been a continuous eating and gaining fest. Then I go on my annual "diet" on January 2.
No more diets, just eating and moving to get healthier. I really do love focusing on the health, rather than the numbers. On the down side, the numbers are going down much more slowly than ever, ever in my life. And on the other hand, I'm noticing amazing health, stamina, and ability progress. I know that in previous weight loss attempts, I also made similar acheivements (if less dramatic, because I had fewer health issues), but I don't remember noticing or celebrating them this much - because the focus was always on the number. With the focus being on health, I recognized and truly celebrate not only the big acheivements (like sleep apnea disappearing and not having to use the CPAP machine at night), but also the small ones (like being able to lift dishes over my head to put them away).
I really think I have a chance this time, because of the way I'm looking at the changes I want to make. It's not about being good, or looking good it's about treating myself with the respect I deserve - and not making food my only source of pleasure and entertainment.
I just wanted to say that I loved reading through this thread. I'm so relieved to see that so many people have had my exact same experience with sugar! Most people seem to think I'm crazy for giving it up, and sometimes it makes me start to wonder if they're right. This thread helped confirm for me that no, sugar IS a drug for some of us (not just me!) and a junkie cannot do drugs "in moderation."
I had the exact same experience on WW that you guys described- it made me obsessed. The obsession so interfered with my life that I never felt confident that I could keep the weight off even if I lost it. It seemed so futile. I feel the complete opposite about my new way of eating.
COngrats on the challenge - SB diet is good as long as you are able to keep up with it....
I am thinking of doing it for real this time, last time I tried it I gave up after phase 1
Athena! Please forgive me for not reading everyone's response, so disregard this if it's already been covered.
COngrats on the challenge - SB diet is good as long as you are able to keep up with it....
