I've been reading alot of posts lately about people who've been hurt and put down by others because of their weight. So I say, let use this thread to share our pain, get our anger out, and then forgive our offenders so as to not hold us back from our weightloss.
This still bothers me, but, when I was a child my best friends brother called me "Killer Cow" I was going into 5th grade and it hurt me so bad.
So, what do I have to say to him?
You were such a little jerk as a kid and I hope that you don't treat women that way now!
Now, for forgiveness...
You were young, and although there are no excuses for what you said, I forgive you.
......an "ex-boyfriend" once told me, "You'd be beautiful if you lost 20 pounds!!!" I lost the weight and then the boyfriend!!!!!
And, I've already posted about my current guy saying "you need to quit losing weight, your skin is looking saggy." (I believe he was jealous of my success)
And it's not just men that say these things........a woman here on town ran in to me in the grocery store last year and said "Oh my. you have really put on the weight!!! What happened to you?" (I had surgery and wasn't able to exercise, but I didn't even bother to tell her that.)
Gosh, I have so many more....I will have to think of them and add them later.
The life lesson to me is that, for me, losing weight is the hardest thing to do.....and I NEVER belittle or put someone down who is struggling with their own weight issues. If I can't say something supportive, I say nothing. Sue
A guy i hadn't seen in a couple years sadi ,geeze you have put on weight.Truth was i really hadn't gained anything,besides how he could tell.His huge potbelly was blocking the view.LOL
For my birthday many years ago, I had saved up and bought myself this very cute little rayon jumper. I was probably a juniors size 11 or 13 at the time - which was tiny for me. Anyway, I was living with my boyfriend at the time and he'd washed and machine dried the outfit about a week after I bought it. Being rayon, it shrank horribly! His response when I pointed this out was not an apology, but "Oh well, that'll give you something to work towards..." (Come to think of it, I probably weighed then what my current goal weight is now.) He was always telling me he wouldn't stay married to someone if they gained a lot of weight, etc. Needless to say, that relationship did not last, and I often wonder if his wife is small and if she stayed that way after they had kids. I sincerely hope hes grown up!
My dad started telling me I needed to lose weight when I was 11. Shortly thereafter, I shot up in height without gaining weight, putting me into a tall but svelte body, but the damage was already done.
My brother used to call me a lard-@ss when I was 17 ... again, I was not overweight. He also made fun of overweight women sitting outside, calling them yard apes & whatnot. His current wife is thin, but he's a very angry and unhappy man.
Oh man - All those meany meany girls when I was in Middle School who still plague me - 15 years later I still have a 'people don't like me complex' even though I have a lot of great friends! Those stupid *****es who were insecure themselves and felt like they had to take it out on someone a little less cute than them... because my hair was frizzy, I had zits, socially inept (because I was made fun of), heavy, bad clothes etc. etc.
But revenge is sweet - I feel great, weigh almost as little as I did when I was 10!!!! (I was 140), have a hot boyfriend, great friends and feel great about myself! Instead of hating to run I do it voluntarily now... I started adding them on Myspace so they could see how I've turn out...
OMG ladies, sorry, I sound really bitter and in all reality prob 95% of us felt this way in middle school/high school and some of us were even probably the offenders (even though it didn't feel that way at the time)
I had an ex-boyfriend run into me once when I was 9 months pregnant. He commented how fat I was and that I'd never get the weight off. His loss, wish I'd see that creep now.
I had a nurse aide that I was working with one time call me a fat cow because I accidentally stepped on her foot while we were trying to lift and turn a patient. She said it right in front of the patient. I wanted so badly to smack her.
My own sister many times made the comment of "you have such a pretty face if you'd just lose some weight". This is hurtful , but she doesn't say it anymore.
Her other favorite comment was "your legs don't have much hail damage for as big as they are".
One of the OB/GYN Dr's I used to work with felt it was his privilige to tell me how big I was. He was absolutely huge himself.
My oldest brother always teased me and called me tubby and a lardo when we were teenagers and I wasn't even fat yet then.
I wasn't going to post to this, but then after reading these stories of being mad fun of when we weren't even over weight, prompted me to. when I was a kid, my brother used to tell me, "you need an escort service and a banner on your @ss that says 'wide load' ". I've always been tall, and at the time (around age 13) I was probably 5ft 5, and weighed about 125 pounds. It hurt so bad, but being older now, I can attribute it to his serious anger and emotional problems that stemmed from us coming from a badly broken home (my folks put the funk in disfunctional), with parents who had a volital (sp?) relationship, so I forgave him long ago. and these other stories, i think, just proves that in a lot of cases, its the person's (who's doing the insulting) own inner problems, be they self esteem or what ever, that's doing the insulting. But no matter. They hit the target and accomplish the goal, and that is to bring us down low enough that they can feel better about themselves.
Before I even knew what WEIGHT was (8 years old?), my best friend Amy called me "Jelly thighs" or "JellyRoll". I never understood why weight was such an issue, I didn't even know what weight was at 7-8 years of age. But one day, we read a book about a girl being teased, called "Fatso". She picked up the name and started calling me Fatso, even though I was a normal weigh for a child. She was just thin and a bag of bones.
Years later I met her again at high school. She asked me what size I wore (how is that relevant when you just meet up with someone for years now?) and she said, 'you don't look too big. I thought you'd be bigger by now".
Hmm... I read your comments and think back myself and am horrified at how people, children especially are treated if they are overweight. One sticks out in particular:
I was giving a presentation in the 7th grade and since we were poor, I couldn't use a WHOLE poster board for my display, only half (how sad is that) as I had multiple projects due. Well, I was standing in front of the class and someone asked where the other half of my poster was, to which a boy replied, "she ate it!". I looked over at the teacher to do something, but he was laughing the hardest of everyone. To this day, it's not the kid that made that memory, but the teacher. I saw him in the grocery store a couple of years ago and wanted to throw a can of soup at his big square head :P
I had the typical preteen boys who would harass me (I won't even tell you the nicknames!), but it's okay now. In fact, we are all friends now. The worst one of all actually took me to my senior prom! I think that's the best "revenge" of all. One of them has apologized to me very time we hang out and that gets old- I'm over it, he should be too.
Every once in a while when I'm home and everyone else is back in town my ego can get out of check. All of the girls in that group have all gained weight and I make them all extremely uncomfortable- and I don't mind that so much.
My X husband used to keep telling be I had "back Boobs", usually in front of our friends and it would make me angry and embaressed, one of the SEVERAL reasons he is an X!!
I was lucky enough to be naturally skinny until I had children at 19 and 21. Even then the weight fell off although I gained a ton. I could eat anything and everything and not gain. time caught up in my mid 20's. So as a child and then in high school I got called annorexic, etc. even though I wasn't at all, far from it!
But once i started gaining weight i started getting flack.
I'd run into people I hadn't seen in years and especially the women would smile. I guess they thought it was funny I had gained weight, which was just as hurtful to me as someone who gets called fat. i did not tease people who were overweight and my best friend was the heaviest girl in our class. If I had had a crappy attitude to others with a weight problem then I could understand their glee over my weight gain, but I didn't deserve it.
One old guy friend asked when I was due and I wasn't pregnant.
My mom said my dad and I looked like a couple of sumo wrestlers one day when we were play-wrestling. I was 19 I think and had just had a baby but I weighed about 10 pounds less than I do now so .... yeah.
There are others, like my grandma who thinks she has free rein to say as she pleases... always saying something about me being big, even to her friends.
So, I guess I got both sides of the coin here but hey, poop happens.
So all of what you've said should be your No. 1 motivation -- to lose the weight, look and feel great, and then PRAY you run into those thoughtless jerks.
Have you ever met a genuinely intelligent, classy person who would EVER say such things?
So all of what you've said should be your No. 1 motivation -- to lose the weight, look and feel great, and then PRAY you run into those thoughtless jerks.
Have you ever met a genuinely intelligent, classy person who would EVER say such things?
If you read my initial post, that wasn't the point of this topic. The point was to share our bad experiences, and then forgive those who have hurt us, so that the negative feelings wouldn't hinder our weightloss.
The one thing that sticks out in my mind, is going to school on the bus in 3rd grade. These guys on the bus started saying to me "Did you get kicked out of Jenny Craig?" I switched schools shortly after that.
LovelyPurple, I'm from WA also. What part are you from?
...and screw you too!
I was going into 5th grade and it hurt me so bad. 
I can relate.......
) as I had multiple projects due. Well, I was standing in front of the class and someone asked where the other half of my poster was, to which a boy replied, "she ate it!". I looked over at the teacher to do something, but he was laughing the hardest of everyone. To this day, it's not the kid that made that memory, but the teacher. I saw him in the grocery store a couple of years ago and wanted to throw a can of soup at his big square head :P
So as a child and then in high school I got called annorexic, etc. even though I wasn't at all, far from it!
