Im new here, and I desperately want to lose my extra weight but I dont know where to begin. I have started to monitor what I eat and track it closely, and I try to go for walks but I have nothing or no one to motivate me. None of my friends are interested, and my boyfriend is less than supportive. I don`t know how to start by myself.
I have 50lbs to lose and that seems like forever away.
Whats the first step?
The first step is to say "I can do this" approach it positively. And find yourself some new friends, whether it's joining a weight loss group, a gym, or just seeking out like minded people. You will get heaps of support here, and I am sure most of us will be pleased to have you as a buddy, if you want.
Then you need to start finding out what the eating plan is that will work for you. I eat a lot of complex carbohydrates, whole grains, beans etc as they fill you up and release energy slowly, and heaps of fruit and vegetables.
This is not going to be easy, but with support, and information, you will make it.
You've already taken the first step! Being aware of what you eat and increasing your activity is a GREAT start. Being positive, as ky mentioned, is crucial. The next step is to understand that "motivation" comes from INSIDE YOURSELF, not from other people. You have to make the commit to making lasting changes in the way you live your life. Some people have the support and assistance of those around them, others have only petulance and sabotage to deal with. That makes it tougher, but doesn't mean it's impossible. Ky is right, as you start to live this healthier life, you will find other people who are doing the same thing. You don't have to abandon your old friends but add the new people to your life. All of this takes time and patience, but you have to change the tapes in your head that are negative and defeatist.
I would strongly recommend you get a copy of the book Thin for Life. It is the "bible" around here, and there is a discussion group about it on the Maintainer's section. It can give you that sense of optimism and a road map that will help you build this new lifestyle from the inside out. I also recommend reading through the other posts in the Maintainer's board, especially the stickies. There is a lot of wisdom there.
Im new here, and I desperately want to lose my extra weight but I dont know where to begin.
You've already begun.
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I have started to monitor what I eat and track it closely, and I try to go for walks but I have nothing or no one to motivate me.
Your motivation is to lose weight for some reason or another. Whatever motivation got you to come here, start monitoring your food, and going for walks. Hold onto that, add onto that. But you're already motivated in a sense.
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I don`t know how to start by myself.
Just like you've started.
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I have 50lbs to lose and that seems like forever away.
Whats the first step?
You've already taken it. Now expand on it. Don't look at losing 50 pounds. Look to lose 10, then 10 more, and so on. Eventually, it will seem like it's been forever since you were overweight.
Well you've admitted you need to change your lifestyle and thats 1st offf!!!!
My advice is try to work little things into your life slowly, nothing drastic, start making healthier choices, start getting more activity....Find things that you enjoy doing that occupy your time and take your mind off of food!!!
At night, when Im hungry, looking to snack, I come online, or sometimes just go to bed, before I blow all the good food and workouts I ve done for the day. Find a group like 3fatchicks, or WW to get into, where you have a support system. I dont have overweight friends who share my story, but I come on here everyday to check in, and something about it keeps me going!!
Most importantly, dont listen to other people, especially negativity, set small goals for yourself and you'll be surprised how far you'll go.
Its tough at first, but stick with it!!!
jewels
Erinyes, Hi there! Come and join one of the threads over on the support groups forum! I hang out on Battle of the Bulge a lot. We're a very chatty bunch and you're very welcome to jump in and get support from us!
In case you're not familiar with navigating this place yet, here's a link to the support groups forum. Just look through the threads and fine one you want to join. Good luck and hope to see you!
The fact that you have started watching what you eat and are trying to exercise more is fabulous! So your friends and boyfriend aren't interested in your weight loss journey? That's okay, you are doing this for yourself not for them, right? That may even be more of a motivator to you, having the 'I'll show them what I can do!' attitude. I am sure they will be proud of you once you lose the weight that you want, and keep coming to a support site like this. It is so therapeutic to be able to say what you are feeling without being judged.
Personally, I have tried to diet a number of times and each time I told people that was what I was doing and in the end did not reach the goal I had set for myself. I decided that I was not going to tell anyone about my new way of eating and I am just going to let the results speak for themself! I used to think it kept me accountable for what I was eating when I told people, but in the end I felt like more of a failure when I did not reach my goal.
You can do it! I think you just reach a point in your life when you say 'this is it!' and you don't look back, you don't beat yourself up if you stray for a meal or even a day. You just get back on plan with determination that the next thing you eat will be healthy, etc.
I know, I am rambling away...so many thoughts...hoping that I get some of them out without the meaning coming across wrong. Wishing you the best success!
Needing encouragement.
Come and join one of the threads over on the support groups forum! I hang out on Battle of the Bulge a lot. We're a very chatty bunch and you're very welcome to jump in and get support from us! 
