As yet another on-plan dinner is in the oven (fennel bulbs and brussel sprouts are roasting) I find myself feeling very, very fortunate to have such a wonderfully supportive husband. He never knew how much I weighed until I started on this path (I wouldn't tell him) and he's been a good sport all along. He's tried so hard not to let my weight gain bother him, or to let ME know it bothered him (although I know it did) and when I had my "Time to change NOW" moment he threw his hat right in the ring with me. Now granted, his top weight is my goal weight, even though he is 6' tall - he's a string bean with the metabolism of a jackrabbit on crack - but he is happily eating what I eat (although more of it) and eating heavier fare at lunch, when I'm not there. He is genuinely thrilled for every little minor triumph "I've lost another pound!" And he WILL NOT bring junk food that I can't eat into this house - in fact, he will only drink wine when I can (I can have 1 glass of red w/dinner, in lieu of my fruit). He is the BESTEST EVER and I am soooo soooo grateful! I can't imagine trying to do this without his support (shudder)!
Anybody else want to brag about their SO - or vent?
LOL!!! I no longer have a SO. He finally admitted that he liked me but he'd never get serious because I'm not his ideal body type, in addition to a few personality quirks he disliked.
It's nice to have someone who supports you fully in your efforts. My husband tries, though he's pretty bad at it! He can't keep himself away from the crappy foods, and while he is better about it, he brings the stuff in and then I end up eating it. I had to laugh at him yesterday though, he was trying to give me a compliment and didn't do the best job on it. I constantly ask him if he can see a difference in this part or that part, and then if his answer isn't enthusiastic enough, I tell him I don't believe him (yeah, I'm needy like that). Anyway, he came into the kitchen where I was getting a glass of water, and he told me, "I can definitely see a difference in you, your belly is smaller and your butt doesn't stick out as far." WHAT??? I know he meant it only in the nicest way, he is just completely inept when it comes to saying it in a tactful way! Anyway, yes, my husband is supportive, just in his own, weird way.
2. He tells me he is proud of me when I exercise and when I take progress pictures
3. He purchased a huge home gym setup (including full power cage, barbells, plates, etc) so we can work out
4. He drinks beer in front of me and eats butter-covered popcorn each night
^^^
WHAT???
True, I consider that to be supportive for me. It helped me learn how to say NO.
For example, tonight, I made him his nachos with cheese and ground beef and a beer. I had a protein smoothie with strawberries and a bowl of my homemade veggie soup. I didn't even take a small taste or bite of his nachos.
Not many people can do that. It's how I learned to say no - by confronting it on a frequent basis. I cannot use the excuse "Oh just this one time..." or "Oh but this is a special opportunity". Nope!
He would eat anything I cook. If it's a salad, he'll eat it. If it's some wacky protein stuff, he'll eat it. He doesn't have a problem with eating what I cook or supporting my goals. He's very supportive of my goals, my plans and my ideas.
The problem is: he loves snacking. And he snacks the BAD stuff. I can't get him to stop, and I don't stop him either because he's not dieting (although he should). But I am very much aware that when he knows I'm watching my weight, he doesn't buy snacks excessively just to be helpful. That's good!
2. He tells me he is proud of me when I exercise and when I take progress pictures
3. He purchased a huge home gym setup (including full power cage, barbells, plates, etc) so we can work out
4. He drinks beer in front of me and eats butter-covered popcorn each night
^^^
WHAT???
True, I consider that to be supportive for me. It helped me learn how to say NO.
For example, tonight, I made him his nachos with cheese and ground beef and a beer. I had a protein smoothie with strawberries and a bowl of my homemade veggie soup. I didn't even take a small taste or bite of his nachos.
Not many people can do that. It's how I learned to say no - by confronting it on a frequent basis. I cannot use the excuse "Oh just this one time..." or "Oh but this is a special opportunity". Nope!
Hahaha! My husband is the same way! Only #4 is snacking...
I'm vegan and he's not, so we generally don't eat the same things anyways... but he has 100% been my cheerleader. He always tells me how beautiful he thinks I am and how proud of me he is.
I'm very lucky as well. When I need to do my workouts, he'll head to the bedroom to watch tv or find something to do so I can use the living room. If it's a time when the kids are awake, he'll go play with them to make sure they stay out of the way of Mommy's kicks and planks and whatever else. He's started eating better to accommodate me and accepts substitutions such as wheat pasta and ground turkey with no complaints. He does bring some crappy stuff into the house, but I do have fairly decent willpower and he doesn't eat it in front of me too often. He's pretty darn good with compliments and telling me he's proud of me too. I love my supportive husband!
My husband stays out of it, and that's the way I like it. He loves me and is proud of me just the same either way, and he never encourages me to splurge or to not splurge--by staying totally neutral, he's neither my enabler nor my food police, which is what I really, really like.
We eat our own food and he cooks for himself, so no problems there. He does bring in junk food, but I can resist it because it's not mine. He certainly doesn't offer me any, though he'd be happy to share if I asked. He has been very good about listening to me talk about dieting and asking questions about the process--pretending polite interest--but his lack of real emotional involvement really takes the pressure off me. He also never complains when I have less time to spend with him because I need to exercise.
For me, this is the perfect approach. I imagine it would seem unsupportive to some.
ETA: He also bakes my chicken every week, which helps me a lot.
I'm sort of lucky. All I can say is he is trying his best to come over to my side for his health and to set a good example for DS. Cooking is pretty much a nightmare, but we're working on it. He does have stuff in the house that is off limits to me, but learning how to deal with that has made me stronger and helped me to learn it's ok to say no and really I like the healthier stuff more than the junk. He always tells me how proud of me his is and that I'm his trophy wife he's supportive of my running and helps out with DS when I need time to train. All in all, for him I couldn't ask for more.
LOL!!! I no longer have a SO. He finally admitted that he liked me but he'd never get serious because I'm not his ideal body type, in addition to a few personality quirks he disliked.
Needless to say...gone.
I can sympathize with you. I had a BF who would say the size of my stomach never bothered him and then days later would tell me my weight embarrased him when we were out. Also.....gone.
Ha, he's pretty supportive. We went to Chevy's for dinner tonight. I ordered the onplan chicken BBQ salad, no cheese, dressing on side and he moved the chips out of my view so I wouldn't be tempted
But seriously, he completely supports my "I don't eat fast food" thing. It makes life a lot more complicated/difficult when you take fast food off the table. He likes it and eats it occasionally, but it's not even a blip on the radar of acceptable food for us together, that's pretty cool.
He is very supportive, but with a few odd quirks... sometimes he says things that hurt me a bit, even though he didn't mean them that way, just because he's a man. he'll apologize later though after i told him how upsetting it was! lol
Otherwise he does want me to lose weight - he lets me spend as much money as i want on workout dvds, dumbbells, workout clothing and extra grocery money to buy myself things that are on plan. He encourages me to keep at it and not get discouraged if the scale doesn't move down every day. He eats what I cook for dinner. He has set aside several hundred dollars for me to go on a clothing shopping spree when I reach goal and he adds money to it for every pound I lose. He bought me an ipod so I can listen to music when I run.
and he'll keep his "bad snacks" away from me and in his office, so the only snacks available to me are the fruits and veggies in the fridge. He reminds me that when I want something bad to eat, I can usually make a healthier version of it that is a lot less fattening.
Of course... one obnoxious side effect is that he's lost weight too, without even trying, because i've been cooking healthier.... he's a whole foot taller than I am so he'll have three helpings of something, but because it's healthier than what I used to cook, he's losing weight. Even though i still have to weigh and measure even the healthy stuff... I guess that's fine, it's just so crazy he doesn't even try and is succeeding, but I have to fight tooth and nail for every single pound lost...
My husband stays out of it, and that's the way I like it. He loves me and is proud of me just the same either way, and he never encourages me to splurge or to not splurge--by staying totally neutral, he's neither my enabler nor my food police, which is what I really, really like.
We eat our own food and he cooks for himself, so no problems there. He does bring in junk food, but I can resist it because it's not mine. He certainly doesn't offer me any, though he'd be happy to share if I asked. He has been very good about listening to me talk about dieting and asking questions about the process--pretending polite interest--but his lack of real emotional involvement really takes the pressure off me. He also never complains when I have less time to spend with him because I need to exercise.
For me, this is the perfect approach. I imagine it would seem unsupportive to some.
ETA: He also bakes my chicken every week, which helps me a lot.
This is exactly how my DH is, and I really like it that way, too!
How Supportive is your DH/SO?
Needless to say...gone.
he'll apologize later though after i told him how upsetting it was! lol
