I was walking down the street. I thought I looked all cute. Some random woman walking the other way came up to me and said "You know, I lost a lot of weight, I'd be happy to tell you about it."
You know, it just killed my whole day. Why do people need to say anything? I was walking out the gym a couple weeks ago, and I was so tired and sore, and walking slowly. Some woman said "walk faster, it gets the weight off." Really? Really?
I just don't understand WHY people say these things? Who do they think they are? And I'm always so stunned.
Anyway, it just really pissed me off, so I'm venting..
The person who said she'd lost a lot of weight and wanted to tell you about it? Sounds like she's trying to sell something.
I am sorry it stunk up your day. Please do not take it personally - even tho' it totally feels like it is. You can't control other people's inability to have an unspoken thought!
People are so annoying! Why do they feel the need to give unsolicitated advice??? Major pet peeve of mine...
Try to just brush it off as their inability to contribute positively to someone's life....
OH MY Some freakin' people,,,!?!?! Errrrrrr!!! I'm so sorry you had to hear those things.
I read somewhere on 3FC that a great response to an idiotic weight comment is: "WOW!?! You said that OUTLOUD?!? How embarrassing for YOU!!" and then just walk away... I have been secretly wanting to try it out, I see my inlaws on the 4th of July... I just can't wait cuz they always have a way of getting under my skin!!!
I think sometimes (a lot of the time) they don't realize what they're saying.
They mean well, and don't realize that it comes off as super offensive.
I just smile and say thanks (but no thanks) and walk away.
Don't let it get you down, you're doing great
I read somewhere on 3FC that a great response to an idiotic weight comment is: "WOW!?! You said that OUTLOUD?!? How embarrassing for YOU!!" and then just walk away... I have been secretly wanting to try it out, I see my inlaws on the 4th of July... I just can't wait cuz they always have a way of getting under my skin!!!
I don't know if I originated this line here or not, but I have used it to great effect. Seriously - it shuts people up QUICKLY.
The person who said she'd lost a lot of weight and wanted to tell you about it? Sounds like she's trying to sell something.
About ten years ago someone stopped me and said the same thing and tried to sell me the Shaklee weight loss potion!
toomuchmoxie - I am so sorry she said that. People are so stupid sometimes. You/we know how wonderfully you are doing. Try and forget her. (consider the source!) Perhaps she was trying to be helpful - but, clearly she was not.
Last edited by Beverlyjoy; 05-01-2010 at 11:00 AM.
She was definitely selling something. What's sad is how often it probably works.
I've not experienced it in Wisconsin (maybe I've just been lucky) but in central Illinois, I would often find anonymous notes (sometimes handwritten)with a phone number to contact about some "miracle" weight loss product.
When it first started happening, I got kind of paranoid (it felt like I had some weird stalker, obsessed with my weight). I was a probation officer at the time (I'm intelligent, but I tend to be naive and sometimes unobservant). I came back from lunch a bit shaken and a coworker asked what was wrong. I told her about the notes, and how creeped out I was. She was thin and started laughing so hard, she couldn't breathe. She explained that all the cars on the block were getting those notes (I was embarassed, but relieved).
I also got a couple torn-out magazine pages advertising weight loss products with a handwritten note from "a friend" (anonymous of course) that this friend was thinking of me and thought I'd be interested in this. At first (because the note appeared to be handwritten), I thought it really was coming from someone I knew, but then I noticed that the envelopes were being sent by bulk mail. The person selling the weight loss product was obviously the sender (and had probably gotten my name and address from some mailing list).
Only YOU know what you have accomplished and where you are at. Whether they are selling something or just rude idiots, it still feeds that negative voice. We have to be our own cheerleaders (I am learning that one) and even though outside support is great, it is that inner voice that makes the difference.
I am sorry that idiot ruined your day. That is rough.
They are not worth it. It is your day, not theirs. They only have the power if we give it to them, their comments are insignificant bugs that we would squash if we even wanted to waste the time.
toomuchmoxie, I know how you feel! I just expirienced this Thursday night, a co-worker of mine, (I take over her shift at night) and I were talking about doctor's and blood tests etc. so I told her my blood pressure has been really high lately. So she decided to tell me I should lose a few pounds and that I look like I've gained a lot of weight recently, (which I have due to meds). she then decided to tell me I look all "puffy" and used her hands to gesture this around her face! Wonderful. So, she left and I cried. The thing is, she's right, I have gained some weight, but your not suppose to tell a person that! Sure, we notice changes in people, but unless its a positive change, I don't think there's need for a comment, especially about someone's weight! Some people unfortunately just don't have the "filter", they say exactly what they're thinking even if its not warranted. Im sorry those people said those nasty things. Your doing the right thing, exercising and losing weight, so screw them!
toomuchmoxie, I know how you feel! I just expirienced this Thursday night, a co-worker of mine, (I take over her shift at night) and I were talking about doctor's and blood tests etc. so I told her my blood pressure has been really high lately. So she decided to tell me I should lose a few pounds and that I look like I've gained a lot of weight recently, (which I have due to meds). she then decided to tell me I look all "puffy" and used her hands to gesture this around her face! Wonderful. So, she left and I cried. The thing is, she's right, I have gained some weight, but your not suppose to tell a person that! Sure, we notice changes in people, but unless its a positive change, I don't think there's need for a comment, especially about someone's weight! Some people unfortunately just don't have the "filter", they say exactly what they're thinking even if its not warranted. Im sorry those people said those nasty things. Your doing the right thing, exercising and losing weight, so screw them!
That was a tacky thing to say, but she may not have meant it the way it sounded: to me, ""puffy" means "swollen" or "bloated", not "fat": maybe she thinks you are retaining water and that's affecting your BP? Like, I had a pregnant co-worker who was exhausted and I told her she looked really, really pale and washed out and needed to go see the doctor to get her iron level checked. I didn't mean it like "you are ugly now", I meant it like "your look has changed and there might be a medical reason for that". (she was anemic!)
But it was poorly said on her part, and I'd have cried, too.
Stupid Things Strangers Say
hahahha
