[EastCoastGal]

Oh man, and I was doing so well!!!!!!!!!
Hello everyone, I just found your site and what a great comfort it is to be here among you all.
I've been on a seemingly endless six month eating spree after crash dieting for my wedding last year and can't stop!!!!! Well I have to stop, I've been trying to get back to a normal mode of eating. I am now trying to introduce little changes into my life to make me feel more grounded around food.
I have learned the hard way, never ever severly restrict food!!! It caused me to unlearn all the healthy habits I had all my life!
I think I am now within a hair's breadth of an all out non-purge type bulemia eating disorder, just so so close. I feel like this is one of my last chances to step back from that cliff.

This is the cycle that has developed over the past year:
Eat nothing for two weeks. (Once I went three and almost passed out)
Binge eat for two days.
Eat nothing for four days.
Binge for two weeks.
Spend a week working out four hours a day to make up for the binge.
Eat nothing for two days.
Secretly eat in my car, hide animal crackers behind the bed (what the heck?)
Etc, repeat.

It's not normal, I feel like I've lost a handle on myself! And it does nothing for the waistline, or skin, or energy level. This all started due to wedding stress and I really need to slow down and get right again. I don't even know why I'm doing this anymore, the wedding was 8 months ago for pete's sake .

Thanks for all your help, love reading all your thoughts about just about everything here in the forum!

[snoopy123]

Welcome. I hope you find some things on here that give you motivation not about food or eating but about what we miss out on in life by putting our focus on these two things that matter the least in front of family. We spend so much time worrying about the # on the scale and what we look like in front of a mirror. For health reasons those things do have meaning but when they don't give us what we need we go looking for food to fill a void. I wish you the best of luck.

[randomcards]

Well welcome to the site,

I'm not really sure what to say since I am remarkably unqualified to respond to the issues you laid out, but they are very concerning to me. It sounds like there are issues there that need to be dealt with head on. From reading nothing more than your OP I would say you need to work primarily on building a healthy relationship with healthy food. I'd tackle that before even thinking about losing weight.

I am however good at math so I'll throw out one thought.

Eating 7 days of 3000 calories and 7 days of 0 calories equals the same total calories as eating 14 days of 1500 calories.

But the latter is vastly healthier and more sustainable than the former.

Kudos for being honest with what you're going through and for seeking support.