[justformenow1]

Hello everybody, I just need a little support here. I have lost 60 pounds and am 20 pounds from goal but I am so HUNGRY! (mentally I think?) I have always been either obese or overweight my entire life, and I mean my entire life. I weighed 140 pounds in the first grade ok?
I don't know if it is self sabotage, but when I'm close to goal I always backtrack and screw up and end up gaining it all back and then some. I'm beginning to think it is self destructive behavior because I have lost the weight before, like twice, and gained it all back. I currently am the weight I was when I lost 60 pounds 8 years ago prior to meeting my DH. Guess what ? I started eating like a pig and gained it back then too, before having 2 kids.
The good news is I am realizing it, so I am more consious (sp?) of what I am doing but still need some help. I don't know, I am babling like an idiot I think, has any one else been through this?
Am I afraid of being a healthy weight? Why can't I just stick to program and get there already!
Any advice is appreciated thanks.

[nelie]

I struggle with weight loss and being scared of weight loss but that doesn't mean that we can't work through it. Are you journaling? That might help.

Are there any specific times you are struggling? Anything you could do to take your mind off the times when you want to eat?

You can do this

[thundahthighs]

You're not alone, you CAN do it, you WILL do, you DO deserve success!
Girl, if you don't feel the confidence, fake it 'til you make it!

I am still in the fake part. I am still practicing smiling at myself in the mirror (instead of instantly making that mental list of what's wrong with me) and it's still pretty hard. The only advice I can offer is - just do it. Lose it. Exist at your goal. Then take that success, and see if it can be the cornerstone in your new, more appropriate self-esteem. I know lots of women work on their self-love first then lose the weight - but maybe for you, maybe for me it works better backwards.

Make your internal voice talk to you the same way you'd talk to a good friend.

You can do it!!

[Starrynight]

OMG, I've done the same thing. I've lose weight fairly easily twice now going from the 190s to the 140's, and with my frame and body type, I looked pretty average.. in both cases I was only 15-20 lbs away from my goal weight and each time I would lose, I would just throw it all away and gain it back. I've also been overweight my whole life and its something thats seriousyl held me back.
Like you, I also think I'm afraid of losing weight.. and I think I've begun to identify why. I think if you can explore why and talk yourself into something solid, it'll help. I know for me it's b.c I put a lot of expectation into what will occur once I get down to a certain size, like my life will magically change or something, but I'm starting to realize that there are certain things that I have to work on outside of weight loss.. and when that threshold comes, I intend on crossing it and getting to goal.
I think like Nelie suggested, journaling does help a lot - just jotting down some thoughts.. then maybe you can figure it out.

[westernsoutherngirl]

Don't give up! I have done that so many times and every time I start over it is so much harder! Like now! You have accomplished a huge thing by getting this far! That said I think Starrynight has the best take on that mental block - things aren't magically perfect at your weight loss goal but weight is one less thing to worry about then and you can address those other issues! Hang in there!

[justformenow1]

Thanks so much everybody!!!!
I've actually got moist eyes right now, your words help and it is good to know I'm not alone with this issue.
Starrynight you took the words right out of my mouth, I just couldn't verbalize it but you sure did. Thank You.

[mayness]

Originally Posted by justformenow1

^^^ I just had to say, that made me laugh, it really looks like (s)he's thinking about eating the pizza.

Maybe you should check out the Featherweights support forum. There are a lot of people there who have lost a lot of weight already, like you (congratulations by the way!!), and are now close to goal. They might be dealing with some of the same feelings.

[jigglefree]

I'm pretty new here and just want to chime in. I have lost the weight and get close to goal, then bam I gain it all back because of self sabotage. I have tried to verbalize the problem to people but turns out they were the wrong ones because they didn't understand the struggle. What I will say is write down the reason you started the journey and keep it everywhere so you can see it to keep yourself reminded as to the why. When we lose focus of the why of the goal it's easy to go backwards.

TIME FOR A FULL COURT PRESS SO YOU CAN GET PAST THIS POINT AND YOU WILL DO IT!!

[MiZTaCCen]

If you give up you'll feel like you failed yourself and feeling like you've failed yourself will only cause you to put back on the 60 wonderful pounds you just lost. Everyone has their times where they just want to quit but seriously keep going because in the end the out come is so much more then you really thought it would be!