When my children were small I absolutely loved Christmas. Shopping for their favorite toys, decorating and cooking lots of goodies. 8 yrs. ago, I married my DH and he has 4 daughters ages 22, 20, 17 and 14. The older ones want money or gift cards only and every single gift I have ever picked out for them they asked for the receipt and took it back. I have had my feelings hurt numerous times over this. My kids still want me to pick them out surprise gifts and love (or at least pretend to) their presents. Last yr. his 17 yr. old wanted a cell phone or "just don't get me anything" and it was the same with the 20yr. old that wanted a digital camera. I gave each of the older girls a gift card and a box of chocolates and told them to buy whatever they wanted. To me, this just doesn't feel like Christmas. I bought the oldest a beautiful, expensive necklace with her babies birth stones and I have never once saw her wear it. To make matters worse, I have cooked large traditional holiday meals and they show up and say "let's hurry this up, we only have a few minutes to get home". It is so hard, I know my DH wants to spend time with his girls on the holidays too. I have even considered just sending them a gift card the week before Christmas so they don't feel obligated to show up and I can have the Christmas that I remember with my own kids. Sorry to rant, the 13 weeks til Christmas thread got me thinking of this. To me Christmas is about the birth of Christ and gift giving is an expression of love and it seems that these girls have never learned this.
I have tried for 8 yrs to no avail to have my DH take responsibility for the gift giving to his girls. He refuses and says "you are much better at it". DUH, apparently NOT.
Last yr. not one of these girls went and saw their grandmother (my MIL) at Christmas and she had bought for each of them (even with her husband passing away 11 days before Christmas). She was terribly hurt and sobbed over this. I felt so bad for her. She sent their gifts home with us and they opened them 2 months later and left them in boxes at our house and never even took them home or thanked her.