Captn kitty update:

At 10am eastern, Captn went quietly to sleep with me petting him. In the light of the vet's office, he looked really bad.

Although I didn't sleep last night, he came into the bedroom and meowed everyone awake like he normally did everyday at 6am. He could barely stand up. After letting the dogs out and him refusing food again, we laid down in bed and I petted his chin and cheeks and head while he purred and purred. We stayed that way for hours, and then we went outside and I held him in the warm sunshine (it's a beautiful day here). I let him walk in the grass a little, but he didn't like his feet wet. hehe. The dogs licked him goodbye and psychotic old Ratkity even nosed him when we left for the vet's.

My heart is broken, but I know I did it for him. I'll get his ashes back in a little bit or so.

I've never had to count down to the time when an animal was put to sleep like this and been able to talk to him and say everything I wanted to say while he was alert. It doesn't make it easier, but the healing has started.

My other old cat, Ratkity, is on my lap now putting my legs to sleep.

Thank you for all your thoughts for me and Captn these last few days.

Oh, and there will be no baby bikerchicks either, alas! The rabbits lived (and are fat and happy in Debbie's garden). *hugs*

Luv, always,
Ratkitten

Ratkitten,

saying goodbye to a pet is so hard. I'm sorry for your loss. *internet hugs*

Dusty

Debi, I'll have to check out the powders. I didn't know they made them....that's how much of a farmer I am. LOL Have a good walk.

Catherine, are you going to be throwing hot dog bombs?

Ratkity, I'm so sorry to hear about Cap'n kitty. It's so hard to make that decision. He's not suffering any more. I'm so glad you got to spend the special time with him.

rat I am so sorry for your loss!!

debbie_ im sure farm got the powder at a farm supply place. good luck.
debi

Hello everyone!

I'm sorry to have to report that I didn't stay perfectly on-plan yesterday as I had hoped . . . I got my exercise in, and I did manage a calorie deficit, but it was small (-145) due to some late-night snacking . Oh well . . . onward and downward today.

Bernice -- I loved your suggestion re photos and it was a really nice sunny day here, so I took a few pictures on my walk this morning - they are attached to this post. I'm looking forward to seeing everyone else's walking routes!

angels -- I'm with you on the baseball uniforms . . . Bull Durham is one of my all-time favorite movies

Debbie54 -- I'm going thru the same thing with my father . Glad to hear that SB is working so well for you

Luan -- how cool that you'll be able to meet up with Annie - have a great time

Carol -- a nightly swim sounds like absolutely perfect exercise for the summer

Debi -- enjoy your squash & squash blossoms - mmm!

Ratkitten -- I'm so sorry for your loss

Description of photos . . . sorry for the poor quality - I used my cell phone, and I'm not a very good photographer!

The lobby of my apartment building as I was heading out to the park this morning.

The entrance to the park.

Grand Army Plaza (SE corner of the park) . . . I liked the juxtaposition of the old-fashioned hansom cabs and the big modern bus!

Pretty spots in the park along my walking route . . . Bethesda Terrace and the Boathouse Cafe.

.

Debbie and Debi - I use plain ole baby powder.

Rat - more hugs than were in the e-mail.

Debi - I have also cut the squash lengthwise to grill. I also love eggplant grilled.

Ria - what great pics - I do my walking on the treadmill - I don't see anything that interesting. Thanks for sharing.

Ratkitten -- I'm so sorry for your loss. It's hard to let them go, but it was the right thing to do. (and I'm hugging my pugs, too.)

Bernice—Wow great Idea. I never thought about taking a camera with me on a walk, but I bet it would really make the walk more exciting and less of a terrible chore! I’m SO gonna do this!

Carol—My sister is doing better, though the creep is still living next door and it’s pretty distracting. Even sitting outside in the backyard is hard because he’s always out doing yard work. What a creepwad. I’m trying not to be upset with my family. I know they could have done it much better…the only thing that really bothers me right now is, I AM actually working a lot harder now, and I hate that they are all walking around like big heroes…I’m doing this for me, not because they ganged up on me. I don’t want them to think it was a great thing they did. It’s great to care about me, but it was pretty terrible. I blame that show on the health channel called intervention. They’ve been TiVo’ing in lately and I think it gave them the idea. However, I am not a crack addict, I’m just a girl who has been overweight since she was 6 years old.

Merksie—Great pictures! How fun. I live in this tiny little town in Michigan outside of Toledo Ohio and when I am in town, there is nothing to see, and when I am in Toledo, I feel more like running—for my life!

Going well today. My family took me to Applebees for lunch. They ordered three appetizers for the five of us. THREE. No wonder I am heavy! But I didn’t partake in any of them! Then I ordered from the weight watchers menu they have there and the meal was alright. It’s nothing like my usual meal, but I felt good. I feel a change in myself already. Confidence, self-support, enjoying the feeling of movement. It’s all good.

Also, I watched a program about losing weight directed by this British man, and he gave a technique of squeezing thumb and forefinger together and remembering a very happy moment. Then you take that feeling you got, and you make it grow, and give it a color. My color is orange, and my feeling is when I was visiting my Welsh ex-boyfriend when I was 22, and we had gone to see the latest Batman movie, and when we got out he kissed me right there in the street in Cardiff. I never felt so beautiful and accepted. Here a handsome man who could kiss me in public and not flinch about it. I use that ad it gives me a happy feeling, the same feeling a comfort food would give me, and I am shocked how much it works. When I am craving, I squeeze my thumb and forefinger together, let that happiness wash over me and I don’t need anything else. For now, It’s working.

I have a meeting with my advisor for Grad school in about 25 minutes so I have to get ready. It’s my first time meeting her, and this woman is my professor for several classes, my advisor and my mentor. I need to make a good first impressing—which is hard because I know my first impression is going to be ‘fat chick’. I so I have to wow her with personality!

Is it wrong that I’m actually hoping she is overweight, too. It would be so much easier than going in and talking to someone with the bone structure of a bird.

Happy thoughts everyone,
Dusty

Hi everyone,
Iam happy to be here.I know that i will find plenty of support here.I made my mind up to lose this weight 6-9-08.I have yo yo dieted for 25 years,it cause me to gain about 200 lbs pass my ideal weight.I weigh myself every monday.so from 6-9-08 to 6-16-08,I have lost 6 lbs so far.so i will take this journey one day at a time.I will keep you'll updated.
Diann.

Dusty -- One of the things I like about academia is that I feel less judged by my appearance! I'm sure you'll make a great impression!

Diann -- I'm sure you'll love it here!

I just had an unpleasant phone call. The interview I sat and waited for last Friday, was actually this Friday. He just called to confirm. I haven't avoided it after all. On a positive side, it will be on their website, so all you fatchicks can click on it to hear my voice. I am going to go throw up, so I'll catch up after I get back from the football game.

Catherine - is it a call in show? You could que us with questions and we could all tie up the phone lines.

Well I left the meeting with my advisor...she was beautiful and skinny, but also very nice and I didn't feel too insecure.

BUT--and I can't beleive this, as I was leaving I thought, I will take the stairs, it is the new me anyhow. So ON the 5the floor, I FELL down the stairs! Oh em Gee.

I tripped on a half eaten Chewy (granola) bar that someone had dropped there.

Does anyone else have this terrible new diet Karma? It never fails! I get the flu, I get a stree fracture, I get a plantars wart (that one was admittedly my LEAST favorite.)

This time, I slam into the linoleum tile with my knee and elbow.

The bad news, I only did half of my workout thus far. I am sitting on the couch under two bags of ice but tongiht I am going to try again with the workout.

The good new...nobody saw it happen...thank goodness.

My mom is so upset now. She was so happy I was doing this and now she seems convinced that I am quitting now. I am gonna push past the pain and work out tonight so she can get that dissappointed look off her face. But MAN my knee is killing me now. 306 pounds of me landed on it today. yikes.

Dusty

Evening Chickies,

Diann, welcome and jump in to share with us! This is a great site and the folks here aren't just here to help with "weight" but with life's ups and downs while we struggle to eat healthy.

Merskie, those are great photos!! Thanks for sharing them with us! You will do well teaching. Listen to what Professor Heather says. She's the professor wid da knowledge!

Dusty, good deal on your healthy choices at Applebee's. I'm sorry your family is strutting around as if they are G*d's gifts for what they thought they did. However, I *know* you are a gift and totally worth healthy choices. Just something to think about... writing down everything that is bottling up about that "intervention". You don't have to give it to them, but write is as if you are. Remember, you are worth healthy choices!!

Catherine, you are proof yet again that what is avoided comes to bite ya in da tailend. It happens to me ALL the time. It's nice to know it happens to other people too. Meanwhile, I know you will do just fine. HUGS to you.

Debbie, what do you do to keep the birdies from taking snack bites out of your tomatoes or other produce?? My dad wants to know! hehe.

Thank you all for all your thoughts and hugs for me today. I needed every single one. The day is almost over and I've lived through it. You all are such a wonderful cyber family.

Hugs to all,
Ratkity

Dusty,

We posted at the same time. First, take care of that knee!!! I fell on my knee a year ago (264 lbs) after tripping over a doggie toy. Ow Ow Ow! I was thoroughly bruised. I also know how you feel about no one seeing that. Don't worry about what anyone thinks as you care for that knee. Exercising through the pain is not a good thing to do. I'm glad you are icing your injuries.

Perhaps this injury can turn things around and allow you to tell your family members to allow you to exercise and care for yourself without policing you. Hmmmm... I seem to be having a strong reaction to what your family did to you. Please forgive my intrusions. It's just that I can see my family doing the same thing to me if we were a younger family and they tivo'd that tv show. Hugs to you!

Luv,
Ratkitten