Okay...so I've lost 53 pounds. I'm sooo proud of myself. Some friends have been giving me some clothes that actually fit my body for a change. I am in a size 8. So, i've been dressing up for my job more now. More dresses and yes...some lower cut tops (not that i picked them out to be that way). So now all the men in the office have to comment everyday how good i look. Some days, i feel like they are just staring at my chest. I was telling one of my female co-workers about it that they act like they never saw boobs before and she said they haven't....on me!!

Don't get me wrong...I like getting attention from guys...but do you have to do it every day!!!!???? It's beginning to make me a little uncomfortable. And no....I can't go to human resources and complain because i am a big flirt at work too. (trust me...been there, done that!!) lol.

Don't worry...i'm not looking for advice really. Just needing to rant to people who might actually understand and maybe be going thru the same thing. Is anyone else going thru anything like this???

Yes.

Nothing like ellaborating there huh rockingrobin????

I went through that! A few years ago, I lost 50 lbs kind of quickly (gained it back of course) and this one guy in my office was CONSTANTLY complimenting me - I don't think he meant anything by it - but it disturbed me so much I would cry! lol..I finally chalked it up to my dislike for any kind of attention and got over it - what I wouldn't give for a little of his attention right now!

I wish I could say that I understand... but I don't. I mean "I DO" understand that some people just don't like attention like that... but..... well, I've always been a vain, flirtatious type - so getting that kind of attention was always a boost to my ego. What I really hate is when I'm "chubbolicious" & I don't get ANY kind of accolades... well, it actually kinda hurts my feelings! ~sniff, sniff~ Of course THEN, if somebody DOES say something complimentary about me while I'm in chubbolicious mode, I think "they're just saying that - they don't really mean it" ... Humph! Can't win when I'm arguing with myself!

YES, yes, I TOTALLY know what you MEAN!!

I haven't lost as much as you have yet, but we are pretty much exactly the same size, and the men at my job just won't leave me alone! They didn't even look at me when I first started working here, but as soon as I started losing weight and stopped looking like Frump Girl, all eyes have been perpetually fixated on me. It's really nice but it makes me feel uncomfortable at the same time. The guys constantly make small talk with me, and while most are polite, some crack some pretty crude sexual innuendos These men DO sometimes just act... like they've never seen a woman before! But I DO have to admit, I AM, without question, the most attractive woman at my job. Most of the office ladies are either huge and frumpy (nono, I'm not saying huge and frumpy go together, only among these ladies), matronly with stringy, unintentionally multicolored hair, and/or plain looking. There are two other twentysomethings at my job, but they both look and dress so ordinarily. Nothing stands out, and they don't get the attention that I do... because I'm cuter! Maybe now you're ALSO the hottest one at YOUR job, lumifan? So the guys just can't get enough of you?

Gosh... I hate to seem simple minded... but if you don't want people staring at your chest, don't wear low-cut tops to work! I mean, you can only expect so much of people (men)...

Jay

Yes, Lumifan, I've had the same problem. Not always with just men staring and flirting either. Last night at Karoke, I had a woman come up and start rubbing my hair and telling me "Oh, you are so beautiful and I noticed you're not with your husband tonite". (DH was at work). This really made me feel pretty dang uncomfortable.

I sometimes feel the catch-22 of wanting to look good and feel sexy, but not wanting the extra attention that comes with it.

I'm with Beach Patrol. I'd love to be in your position, lol.

I'm one of the few women that doesn't mind her chest being stared at. ****, I don't mind if guys undress me with their eyes... I know it's what men do. They can look. What DOES annoy me, however, is when they wear out their looking welcome mat, you know? There's a point when looking/checking out becomes rude staring, and thaaaat's when it gets really uncomfortable. I figured lumifan was probably experiencing the same thing. The long stare/leer is disgusting, yet men do it anyway. Come on. Can't they even TRY to PRETEND that they aren't STARING nonstop?

My experience, limited though it may be, is that some men will not stop a behavior until someone tells them to stop. And then they will sneak. Not all men, but some.

And, I still don't get it. "My boobs are out but why do they keep staring at them?" uhhhh...

Lilybelle, alcohol can be a terrible thing...

Jay

Has happened to me as well. When you are the only woman in the field and you dress is your sexiest 5 year old field pants, an old shirt, and big dirty boots, add in a dirty cap and dust everywhere, well, I know why I drive the men wild.

Over here though, they are more straightforward. The usual question order is:

"Do you have a boyfriend?"
"Do you like your boyfriend?"
"Are you faithful?"

And no, I'm not the type to appreciate it.

Heh... how many people would actually SAY "Yes, I have a boyfriend & yes I like him... but I'm NOT faithful." ?????????????? Duh-uh!

I miss the male attention I used to get in my thinner days although my dh says guys still check me out and that I'm oblivious to it. Of course I don't appreciate any crude leers etc. But it's fun when you have a little chemistry going. I've worked mostly with staff of women so no fun office flirtations for me. I am comfortable with men as I grew up with lots of brothers, no sisters and I have all sons. Even though I'm overweight, I feel very voluptuous. I still have a shape. I am the curvy type so still have a small waist and am in porportion. I guess I've gained evenly all over so I'm just a bigger version of my normal self (if that makes any sense at all). That's why I have a hard time sometimes realizing I'm as big as I am (except when I see a photo) because my shape hasn't changed drastically and I look pretty solid in clothes. So weird the tricks your mind can play on you.
L.

I can totally relate! I work with mostly men and some of them have been pretty inappropriate over the last few months! The worst was a guy who was having trouble with his wife and he began to really "check me out" then tell me how awesome, beautiful, etc., etc., I looked that day. RED FLAG! So I had to lay low from him for awhile. I've also noticed just random men on the street being friendlier, holding the door for me, etc., and that has seemed kind of odd. It's like the bigger you are, the less you are seen.