** Birds of a feather flock together and poop on your car.
** There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.
** When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It drives the neighbor's dog nuts!
** If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
** Don't assume malice for what stupidity can explain.
** A penny saved is a government oversight.
** The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.
** The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.
** The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.
** He who hesitates is probably right.
** If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody.
** The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.
