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Old 06-29-2002, 11:00 AM   #1  
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Default I need help with Alvin.

I've been so proud of Alvin and how he is doing, but he has had a setback this week and he won't talk to me about it, or won't even tell me what the doctor said. It's enought to drive a gal to drink!!!

This is what I know. When he went to the surgeon for his followup they had him retake his blood test because they said his nitrogen was low. The new labs showed the same things and they referred him to a kidney specialist. Since he had an apointment with his PCP already scheduled, he talked to him about it and came home feeling good. Said the PCP agreed with him that there was no need to see the specialist.

Yesterday afternoon he got a call from the PCP's office and now he's called to make an apt with the specialist and he talked to the doctors office quite a long time, he won't tell me anything they said. Says he doesn't want to talk about it. So this morning he wouldn't drink his protein drink and is sending me to the store for oatmeal. GO figure?

Could this have anything to do with the surgery? Or could this be in regard to the fact that he's getting too much protein? I keep thinking that if I quite bugging him, he'll eventually tell me what the doctor said, but right now he just says "I don't want to talk about it"

Any ideas?
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Old 06-29-2002, 11:16 AM   #2  
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Oh ageoldie, I wish I had some inspiring words to say and some sage advice, but I just want to say hang in there! It seems he is getting discouraged and itlooks like he's going to need to go and see the specialist to figure out what the problem is. God Bless!
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Old 06-29-2002, 12:20 PM   #3  
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Oh Barb -- MEN!!! when you DON'Twant them to talk, they won't shut up -- and when you want them to say something they do a wonderful imitation of the sphinx!!! ... and they say WE are hard to figure????
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Old 06-29-2002, 12:21 PM   #4  
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Barb - I have one of those strong silernt types. The best thing I ever did was insist with his Doctor that I be in on the appointments. Marriage is a partnership. And you can tell Alvin, I said so! His recovery is a task for BOTH of you and he needs to realize that.
Sorry this sounds so tough but men need a good slap every so often!t
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Old 06-29-2002, 04:32 PM   #5  
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I completely agree with Ruth! Tell him that you will be phoning the specialist Monday to set up an appointment for BOTH of you. No ifs ands or buts! Marriage is,indeed, a partnership and has no room for silence.

My DH found that out the hard way and it almost destroyed our marriage. Personally, I think men are complete fools at times!
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Old 06-29-2002, 04:45 PM   #6  
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not quite sure what's going on here, but i suspect that alvin's high blood pressure may have caused some kidney damage that's showing up with the high protein diet.

yes, yes yes. both of you go to the doc... and don't let him wiggle out of it!!!!
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Old 06-29-2002, 07:39 PM   #7  
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I have to tend to agree with Jiff.

Another twist of that is that his high BP was related to some latent kidney problem, and with the higher protein intake it is starting to wreck havock with his kidneys. either way you MUST go with him to the Doc!!!
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Old 06-29-2002, 08:54 PM   #8  
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Well, I finally got him to talk this afternoon. He has seen the kidney specialist before, but at the time he said that there wasn't much he could do because he was too "big" for a needle byopsie (sp? seems like the older I get, the worse I spell!!!) His PCP has been watching his kidney function for quite a while. But it seems that since his surgery his kidney function has decreased .3 or 3. or 3 somethings. Anyway, I guess it's off to the specialist again.

His PCP has cut his diabeties meds again, so that's good. Maybe next month he'll discontinue it altogether.
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Old 06-29-2002, 09:03 PM   #9  
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Glad you could talk. Hope that this time he can get things done that needs to be done. He must have forgotten about the problem as his other things has been keeping in the forefront of his mind. the great news is that his diabeties is getting better. (DUH me i forgot about the DM that would have a factor in thekidney process) I will have him im my prayers for health.
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Old 06-30-2002, 07:44 AM   #10  
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Barb, I just don't understand these guys. Don't they know that when they withold from us about their health that we always fear the very worst? *geez*
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Old 06-30-2002, 10:03 AM   #11  
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but the strange thing is that they are such babies when it comes to colds and simple things like that. and my dad was completely obsessed with his digestive tract. never mind that he was in heart failure, and rarely complained about that.. but his digestion: daily complaints!!!!!
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