Ellis that was hilarious!

Ellis I love it!

Fairy Story
A fairy told a married couple: "For being such an exemplary married couple for 35 years, I will give you each a wish"
"I want to travel around the world with my dearest husband" said the wife.
The fairy moved her magic stick and abracadabra! Two tickets appeared in her hands.
Now it was the husband's turn.
He thought for a moment and said: "Well this moment is very romantic, but an opportunity like this only occurs once in a lifetime.
So.... I'm sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me".
The wife was deeply disappointed but a wish was a wish.
The Fairy made a circle with her magic stick
and.......abracadabra!...
Suddenly the husband was 90 years old.
Men might be *******s.
But Fairies are....................Female!


(Please everyone don't think I hate men... I have the greatest husband in the world, but I keep coming accross these hillarious male bashing jokes....)

Loved that one.

LOLOL!! that was great

hilarious Lanaii.

This one made me laugh. Hope it does you too.


This should once again confirm that the most important information in your life won't come from a teacher , the library, or the Internet but from a mentor, and on a very personal level.

My long passed grandfather's birthday is coming up, and for me it is a time to reminisce. The long walks we used to take. The special trips he would make to pick me up so I could spend weekends with him; and the advice he used to give! Much was wasted because I was young when he died.

If he were alive today and sharing his gems of wisdom, I'd be a better man. Those gems were well and good, but the one I remember most, the jewel in the crown of grand fatherly advice, came when he paused, looked me in the eye and said,

Don't marry a woman with big hands, it makes your pecker look small.

..... brings a tear to your eye doesn't it ...

Cute!

Great new signature Teufelchen - think I'll have that put on my tombstone That or LIVED! in big bold letters and nothing else

OMG I love that one!! Very Cute....

Oh... that is GREAT, Teufelchen!

Marriage (Part I)
Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding,
he laid down the following rules:

"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want-and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"

His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night... whether you're here or not."
(DAMN SHE'S GOOD!)

Marriage (Part II)
Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary!
The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads,
'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever.'
“Yeah?" she replies. "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads,
"Here Lies My Husband Stiff At Last.'"
(HE ASKED FOR IT!)

Marriage (Part III)
Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast table.
Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bed either," and storms out of the house.

After sometime he realizes he was nasty and decides to make amends and
rings her up. She comes to the phone after many rings, and the irritated husband
says, "what took you so long to answer the phone?"
She says, "I was in bed."
"In bed this early, doing what?"
"Getting a second opinion!"
(YEP, HE HAD THAT COMING, TOO!)

Marriage (Part IV)
A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so proud
of himself, that he starts calling his wife," Mother of Six" in spite of her objections.
One night, they go to a party. The man decides that it's time to go home
and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well. He shouts at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home 'Mother of six?"

His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion shouts right back, "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four." (RIGHT ON, LADY!)

Love those, Donna.