Swinging by to check in on you lovely ladies and say hi! Still having a heck of a time with this pregnancy and weight gain, but chilling out a bit and just doing my best instead of stressing. Apparently gaining 40-ish pounds back after a big loss isn't actually that unusual, some hormonal thing. But I'm hoping to get it right back off without a ton of drama postpartum. Pray for me on that point!

I'm so pleased to see how active this thread has been and how many regainers aren't giving up. You guys are SO encouraging!

Toasted smoke, I'd be decking someone if they said 'you used to be my inspiration'. Talk about backhanded compliments! You look great in that purple dress, though!

Hey everyone sorry been MIA for a few days. Sunday and yesterday were super busy. Sunday I went bowling for the first time in years and yesterday did some punching and 30 day shred...today will be my c25k!!!! I am sticking with this running thing LOL I haven't weighed due to the fact of this week being an all High Carb week I am nervous and doing more exercise so I can only hope for a loss.

Laurie great job on getting below 220

Toasted...holy cow you look so beautiful...embrace it and don't let anyone tear you down!

Jessica ...I would kill that scale....

Martini...hang in there you can do this...we all struggle and fall at times but it is the getting back us that defines us!

Diane....hope work goes ok and hope you see a loss soon..

Artic...hope your pregnancy does really well throughout!

Hi all!

Well, that didn't work. I just don't like going home and getting on the computer. So, that's not happening. I'm not really worried about looking at this at work, I just don't want to put a lot of thoughts down and have someone from work see that I'm struggling here or there. Or if I put something profound on a post, it may not be something I want them to know! It is so freeing to be able to write about feelings/thoughts here, or talk endlessly about workouts, without worrying about someone I see every day making a judgment. I work with some really good people, but there are some things I just don't want them to know!! Ha!

Went to Body Pump today. Good workout, but it was pretty hot in there. Really sweaty. Tomorrow is run/walk day. I kind of look forward to that. I even set up a new playlist on my iPod for working out.

Martini: glad I am not the only one not weighing right now. Solidarity, indeed!

Lauire: as always, thanks for the encouraging words!

Does anyone here use a fitbit or similar device? I just got one last week and I really like it so far.

I am posting from work so I apologize for the short message; I am beyond busy, so I really shouldn't even be posting, but I just wanted to check in and say hello to everyone.

Diane - I tend to do a run-by in the afternoon to see posts, and I wanted to make a suggestion as to how you can successfully sneak in a post. ;-) I can't believe I'm admitting to this, but...

I have an office with my screen turned away, so it's normally not difficult for me to post. But, on those days that I'm "in charge" here (I'm actually #3 in the ranks, so that only happens when #s 1 and 2 are out), I have people in and out of my office all day, and I tend to go back and forth between writing my posts and doing other work anyway. So, I actually will type my post in a Word doc that is an actual work product, so it looks like I am working, and no one really pays close attention to what the words actually are. Then, it's a quick cut-and-paste operation, though you have to be super careful to remove the post from your doc and save after to get rid of the auto-save of your post.

And I am glad this site is anonymous!

Not that you have to write a lot to contribute. But, I am presenting an alternative for your consideration. =)

Martini - Awwww, guys! There's so much love in this thread. <3 I know what you mean about some days just being not into it. I had one of those moments on my walk yesterday. I still hadn't made up the miles that I got rained out earlier this week and so I forced myself to do them yesterday. I'd done a few of them and was wanting to back out and had to have a serious chat with myself about not being a lazy sake of bones. I bowed to myself and got the laps in and felt awesome about it afterwards.

Toasted - It was like I told my mom on the phone earlier. As much as I love my brother and as great as his finance can be, they argue a lot and it's not something I've ever been particularly fond of being around. It'd be nice, too, because while I'd be on Rhieannon's property I'd essentially have my own space. Like a tiny little apartment that's all mine vs a single room in the house that's full of stuff that isn't mine and the corner of the kitchen table where my laptop hangs out at.

Laurie - I'm so so so so beyond words excited and happy for you to have officially broken through that barrier and joined me in the two-teens. It's going to be good times! Great job with the C25K last night and the NSV of looseness in formerly tight clothing. I'm so proud of you!

Taryl - Hang in there. Take care of baby and yourself and you'll be able to hop off your hiatus soon enough and rejoin us once again.

Jenni - You're doing awesome, keep it up! I know sometimes the scale can make us nervous but you'll be fine. I used to do 30DS the last few times I lost. And it was awesome. I've found though that I've grown significantly less fond of Jillian's coaching style - honestly, I never was fond of it to begin with. I wish there was a way that I could just replace her voice with music and a random person telling me when to switch exercises. Lol.

Diane - I think you'll find that you'll figure out a way to make the new location work without circumventing your ability to be uber insightful. It's just going to take a little adjustment. Awesome workout, btw!

LotusMama - I don't have one, but I'd really like one. Let me know how it works for you so I can continue to drool as I don't have the funds.


Guys! I don't know why but I'm just in such a good mood. In some ways, I think it's because I've been regularly chatting with a trio of very good writer friends on a regular basis again. There is something about the three of them that has always had the ability to make me happy even when I'm having a not so good day. Though I'm not having a not so good day, I'm having a pretty awesome day.

The scale came in at 216.8 lbs today, putting me 3.2 lbs down since last week. Maybe that has something to do with the perkiness. Lol. In regards to the scale and getting a new one, if the new living situation does pull through then I'm going to have to force myself to find money in the budget for a scale. Obviously I won't have access to this nutjob anymore. The thought of a new scale in a new location is a little anxiety-invoking 'cause you never know what it's going to tell you but all-in-all, I think I'll be okay.

As for the writing, I am so pleased to be making forward momentum on the novel again. This is the second draft, I wrote the first one in November of 2012, and it took a long time for me to be able to start to unravel the mess of the very rough first draft enough to fix it. Just about anything I write in November is part of National Novel Writing Month (you write 50,000 in 30 days) so it's bound to come out as a hot, jumbled mess.

Looking at the two, they're hardly the same story now though there is a thread of it that holds true. The good thing is that because it's the second draft, I'm not writing it under the deadline of Nano - which is such a great motivator for a perfectionist like myself to just get the words out; it's helped me improve my writing so much by just allowing myself to write - I'm able to take the time to step back when I need to and let the story form in way that I'm happy with. One of my biggest flaws has always been to fall back on exposition when I'm having a hard time and that always leads to scenes feeling forced so I'm making sure I don't allow that to happen. I was hoping to have the second draft done by this November so I can start on the first draft for the second book in the series, but I'm thinking it'll end up just being me taking a step back from The Becoming to knock out a very rough draft for The Undying instead.

Jessica--you are rocking it! Your hard work and positive attitude are such an inspiration. So far, I like the fitbit. I am definitely more aware of how much I am moving... or sometimes not. I think it was a good investment.

Keep up the good work!

Just wanted to pop in and say hi to you guys!

You all are my internet family, and it's weird not coming by and sharing my successes and struggles with you! My husband doesn't really *get* it when I'm excited to see a certain number, and my in-laws certainly don't get why it's such an awesome hard-won victory when I've managed to limit my intake of something fantastic and super high in calories.

So, I'm just swinging by to tell you I've been pretty good on this trip, avoiding all the snacky stuff for the most part. My only "bad" meal was last night with family. My MIL's new boyfriend was treating us all to half price burgers at a local English pub type place... So, I totally caved and got the Guiness BBQ burger... which was a 1/2lb burger, topped with pulled pork with house made bbq sauce, swiss cheese, bacon, and onion straws. It was AMAAAAAAAZING.... I only ate half of it though. I probably could have finished it, but I recognized my "hey lady, you're full!" cue, so even though the food wasn't the most healthy choice, I'm proud of myself for knowing when to stop.

Today I got to see my bff for the first time in over 3 years... and to meet her 3 month old baby. I am so in love with this bald cutie! I get to spend most of the day with them tomorrow, before heading back to hubby's father's house, and then all of the siblings will be arriving.

His step-mom made a massive batch of chocolate chip cookies that I'll need to avoid. I can't eat just one.

Wish me luck, and I'm looking forward to catching up with you guys when I've got more time. I'm headed to bed for now.

Good night!

The hubby's in the shower. The candy bars are in the pantry. And I want to eat every. single. one. of. them. I am ssssoooo not in Kryptonite. But. I had a very good day with food and exercise up until now, and I desperately don't want to go back over 220. Again.

So, I folded and put away my laundry. Drank 20 ounces of water, even though I know it will mean that I will have to get up and use the bathroom at some point tonight. And vowed to post here.

I feel like I abuse this thread sometimes. I feel like I use it more for a crutch than anyone else here. But I promise you this. If I commit on this thread that I will not eat a single candy bar, I won't. And I am sometimes capable of eating a few squares and walking away. Barring that, I am often capable of eating a few squares and destroying the rest. (Destroy as in - throw them in the garbage and bury them so I don't dig them out.) Right now, I don't trust my ability to eat a single candy bar and walk away, let alone only a few bites. There are probably 2 dozen candy bars in there. I bet I would stop at 5 or 6. So, I can't even have the first bite, and I know it.

Once the hubby gets out of the shower, I'm safe. I can get my shower in, brush my teeth, and go to bed. Until then, I'm in the danger zone. But I have a project that I need to work on. I vow to do that until the hubby gets out of the shower. This can be so hard!

Internet is down, so just going to do a quick phone post. Thanks for giving me a place to vent last night. I survived my mini-crisis, and got my long-awaited whoosh this morning. 216.8. Finally putting some distance between me and the dreaded 220 number.

Hope everyone has a great Wednesday.

Laurie...woohooo for the woosh! You go girl! Btw do NOT feel bad we all have those weak moments and it takes a lot to come on here and post them...more power to you...you are awesome and that proves your awesomeness!

Jessica your awesome and what an awesome week to have!

Martini...I know you are discouraged but please remember you keep coming back and you keep trying...that is more than many people out there. Keep it up...you will do this and you can!

Diane...hope you get some privacy at work and I feel you...I don't like everyone knowing some stuff either. I feel this is like a safe place to mark down my feelings on weight where not all people will understand. Not everyone has had to deal with being overweight!

So yesterday I finished day 1 week 3 c25k....and I don't know how I will even do more than 3 minutes jogging LOL I about died! Today is the SHRED I may go out in the garage and punch the punching bag for awhile too! Still nervous about this high carb week.....hoping for a loss on Saturday its up to my body though!!!!

Hi all!

Had a great day working out this morning. I did the treadmill run/walk. I still can't go past the 2 minute mark while running, but I'm still going to work on it. I just keep alternating walking and running, so I'm hoping it will keep getting better. Well, I know it will get better, just probably not as fast as I would like. I was kind of sore from yesterday's body pump class, so I must have worked hard yesterday!

I have really been getting a lot of comments on my weight loss. That's great that people have noticed, but it also is more attention than I really want. I know that it is a huge difference, but I don't want to talk about it all. the. time. Oh, I'll put up with it, but it would be nice if everyone could move on.... I know, not a big problem, but you know.... My son told me to embrace it and just brag about it, but I still have a long way to go. Let's talk when I get to goal. And, honestly, if you talk about it, then you are opening yourself up to having to hear why others aren't having success. One woman told me that she just doesn't have time to exercise and she just can't follow those "fad" diets. Umm. I count calories. Not much "fad" about that. Since she doesn't have kids, isn't married, has money... I'm not buying that she doesn't have time to exercise. So, using something that I learned over at MFP, I answered, "K." UGH!

Mandy - Hope you avoided the cookie monster last night and way to go on listening to you body and knowing when to put the delicious burger down.

Laurie - And here we are, right back to matching numbers, lol. Congratulations, I told you it'd happen. <3

Martini - I've participated every year since 2006. In my experience I tend to alternate years that I hit the 50k mark and it wasn't until 2012 that I hit 50,000 AND finished a manuscript.

In relation to the grumpy nature, hang in there. Tom can do nasty things to our bodies and our emotions and, even if it's not tom, we've all had those days where it just doesn't seem worth the struggle and I know you can pull through.

Jenni - Great job with all your exercise; you're doing incredible.

Diane - Yay exercise! Aside from an almost 2.5 mile walk with Luna, I was more or less forced into a rest day by my body yesterday. The day before, I don't know if it was the increased squat reps, the side lunges, the 3.5 mile walk, adding inchworms in, or a combination, but my butt muscles were sore. XD Add that to an achy knee and I figured it was for the best. I'm still not sure what I did... Last night I was going along working fine and a got a sharp pain just under my right knee cap. It's at the location that I've had nerve damage from falls several times, so my immediate reaction was "When did I fall?" Thankfully it didn't last long, but it was still surprising.

Your observation of people always wanting to talk about your weight reminded me of something my brother's fiance said a few nights ago. My brother was talking about possible meals he might cook and asked if she and I would be interested in having one of them for dinner. I can't even remember what it was but she came back with a comment about how as long as it fits into my diet I'll eat it.

First of all, don't answer for me. Second, I AM NOT ON A DIET. I hate the word diet, especially when used in reference to MY weight loss. Diets are transient things. What I am doing is not something that I want to be transient. I want to lose the weight, I want to get healthy, and I want to STAY that way. This is my lifestyle. Additionally, I don't have restrictions on what I can and cannot eat. If I wanted to go out and eat a whole pizza, I could. The thing is, I don't WANT to. If you offer me something and I say no, it isn't because I can't have it if I want to lose weight, it's because I don't want it. Period.

I finally got both an internet connection and a few minutes to check in!

Diane - I have actually been thinking about this very thing. I am starting to be able to fit into smaller sizes, and some of my "regular" clothes are literally falling off me. Still, it will probably take another 10 pounds or so for anyone to notice, if my past experience holds. It is weird when people notice and comment. It is also weird when no one comments. I love your response to the "I can't lose weight" girl. "K." Is she asking your blessing to be fat? Why would she think you're the weight god, bestowing dispensations to those who "don't have time" to exercise?

Jenni - C25K is kicking my butt too! I have done Week 4, Day 1 twice now, and not finished it either time within the allotted period. (I took a walking break during the final 5 minute run last time.) Today's the charm, though. As soon as I finish this post, I am going to the gym, and I will finish it this time as specified.

Martini - THANK YOU for your compassionate response. Twice now, this thread has been a lifeline to me. And now that I got my whoosh this morning, things are feeling much more kryptonite. Even 5 candy bars last night wouldn't have caused me to gain 20 pounds back, but it would have had an impact on the scale this morning, and I would have been back to tiger-wrestling mode. I am so grateful that y'all held me back. And that you have given me not only permission, but encouraged me, to continue using this thread in that way. I have many months (and years) ahead of me in this weight loss struggle. I don't think I would be winning if it weren't for this kind of support. And hooray for you for keeping on keeping on despite the TOM-induced miasma. (And yes, I feel like I can use words like that on a thread inhabited by writers whose vocabularies are likely far better than mine!)

Jessica - So weird that you whoosh ahead of me, maintain for a while, then let me whoosh down to where you are before you whoosh down again. Very kind of you to stay just ahead enough so that I don't get totally discouraged, but not so far that I feel like I have no shot at it. =) And yes. I HATE when people make dietary decisions for me. My hubby and I are planning on traveling in October for a belated honeymoon. He was talking about the wine and cheese, and said, "But I'll be the only one eating it because you don't ever eat anything fun." First of all, that's so not true. I have had a number of days where I planned my calorie budget so I could eat crap with him. And secondly, these are my decisions to make. My current obsession is spinach with berries. I may want some of that when we go (though I'll probably have moved on to another obsession by that time), but I am not going to go with him to nice restaurants and watch as he eats the food. I will probably be a little careful with portion control, but I do plan on eating.

My scale said 216.8 this morning, down 2.2 from yesterday morning. For about 14 days prior to that, it said either 220.x or 219.x, with most of them being 220.x. Yet, my brain is STILL calculating how quickly I will lose the weight at the 2-pounds-a-day loss rate. WTH? I promise - I am logical. I understand that my weight whooshes. I get that it's possible that I will get another small whoosh tomorrow morning, based on my previous trends, but that there is no physical way that I will ever lose 14 pounds in a single week based on the plan I'm following. Four days ago, I despaired of ever going below 220, even though I knew my trends and knew I was on plan. I will not accept that I am actually crazy. I think scale manufacturers implant some sort of device that is transmitted through our feet when we step on the scale that messes with our minds.