This stories are so sweet. And I can see why a lot of you were aprehensive about telling others where you met. If I was to meet someone online I probably wouldn't tell anyone, just because my family are a bit prudish about that kind of thing.
I am really starting to like this guy. Every time I check my email and see that he sent me a message I get butterflies in my stomach. He's really sweet. Quiet shy, his messages are short but it's just like he know what to say and doesn't waffle, which I like. eeeeeee. I am a bit afraid of letting myself get to excited about it....
One of the huge advantages for us was talking for hours on the phone early on; it established the foundation for the communication that we share to this day.... we talk about EVERYTHING.
i definitely agree with this. it almost felt like "courting" back in the Victorian day.
5) If you hit it off over email/phone, try to meet as soon as possible.
There's nothing worse than getting emotionally invested in someone and then meeting them and you just don't click.
6) Be totally up front about what YOU want on your profile. For example, if you are totally against smoking, state it in your profile. If you eventually want to get married, have kids, state it in your profile. If you are worried that less people will approach you because of it -- think of it this way -- you don't want them anyway!!! Any guy who is afraid to talk to someone who says "eventually I would love to be married" is a guy you don't want to get involved with ANYWAY! Right?
~CGH~
I just think this is really great advice. Also garstar, about not changing for anyone and being yourself, I think that is spot on as well.
I rarely actually post on here...I'm usually just a lurker...
I met my best friend, and hopefully my future husband, online almost 12 years ago. I was only 11, and he was 14. We met through ParentsPlace, which was a website for parenting tips, that ivillage eventually bought out. There was a children's chatroom for registered user's kids. 11 years and 11 months later, we talk every single day, love each other, and have serious future plans together.
We STILL haven't taken that next step and met....but that's coming hopefully this summer (as a surprise to him)! He's asked me to move closer to him, and of course meeting is first step. It seems unreal that I could ever be this serious with someone and still not have met them. But, I can say that he honestly knows me as well, if not better, than I know myself.
None of my college friends know that he is from the internet...there is a complete back story about how we used to go to school together, blah blah. My mom knows the truth...and loves him, but is completely hesitant on the idea of me finally meeting him.
I too agree that the internet is safer than meeting a guy in a club or bar. As long as you yourself are cautious. =]
I met my husband on Match. We just got married Nov 1, 2008. You have to use your instinct, a lot of common sense, and just be cautious. If you have a red flag, then trust your instincts, even if you can't put your finger on it! Good luck to you.
OH, and I agree that a key to success is to be TOTALLY upfront in your profile, in your first conversations. If you have a child, if you want or don't want children, if you are looking for eventually getting married. Don't beat around the bush. If those things are dealbreakers for you, and you know it, then state it upfront, it makes it less akward later. Nothing is harder than having to walk away due to a dealbreaker, AFTER you are already emotionally invested in the person.
I met my boyfriend online. It wasn't a dating site though. It was on the Steve-o from Jackass message board. I always thought his posts were so funny, so one day I messaged him, and we started chatting on msn for hours every day (Around Oct/Nov 06). From the posts he made on the message board, I would have sworn that he was a ladies man, so i was a bit apprehensive at first. Then after only a few weeks of chatting constantly we were falling for each other. I made plans to visit him on my spring break(Mar 07). I was 18(he was 23) and lied to my family about who I was going to visit, I told them me and a friend were going to go to Disneyland (I lived in Texas). Then the day I was to fly out I told my mom who I was really going to see. She was nervous for me, but I was in college, and a 'grown up' so there was no stopping me. We spent the whole week together. It was awesome. Then for the next year and a half we had a LDR seeing each other every 3 months for a week. Finally this past August we moved in together. We have an awesome relationship and I look forward to spending forever with him.
I filled out a profile at EHarmony & have participated in the past 2 free weekends. (I don't think I want to waste my $ by signing up without trying it first.) Things have not gone so well. Every decent guy that I've been matched with has hit "closed".
I think it's a combination of weight plus another factor. I haven't dated in 3.5 years so I'm kind of lonely.
I got divorced in 2007 and have been kinda stuck in that in between mode ever since so I feel your pain Jelly! I have generated the same type of response in just about all the guys I have emailed on Match and okcupid.... I am hanging in there though!
i met my boyfriend on plentyoffish.com.... couldn't ask for a better mate... i'm fairly certain he's the one... when we met it was like i'd known him for years
No matter where you meet someone, I would thoroughly check them out before getting too invested. I would run a credit check, school records, police records, etc. If they say they own their home. check it. If they say they have XX, and XX degrees, check it. I have seen many friends get burned--some even after marriage because of lies they were told.
Some would say this is a trust issue or whatever for me and maybe it is. But I would be completely comfortable with someone checking me out and would understand and even want them to.
Last edited by Thighs Be Gone; 01-05-2009 at 10:20 AM.
i met my boyfriend online but you also have to be careful there are some pervs out there.But sometimes there are special people the we meet online.Good luck
I rarely actually post on here...I'm usually just a lurker...
I met my best friend, and hopefully my future husband, online almost 12 years ago. I was only 11, and he was 14. We met through ParentsPlace, which was a website for parenting tips, that ivillage eventually bought out. There was a children's chatroom for registered user's kids. 11 years and 11 months later, we talk every single day, love each other, and have serious future plans together.
We STILL haven't taken that next step and met....but that's coming hopefully this summer (as a surprise to him)! He's asked me to move closer to him, and of course meeting is first step. It seems unreal that I could ever be this serious with someone and still not have met them. But, I can say that he honestly knows me as well, if not better, than I know myself.
None of my college friends know that he is from the internet...there is a complete back story about how we used to go to school together, blah blah. My mom knows the truth...and loves him, but is completely hesitant on the idea of me finally meeting him.
I too agree that the internet is safer than meeting a guy in a club or bar. As long as you yourself are cautious. =]
What a cool story! Please report back to this thread if you two should meet in the near future
Choirgirl and Garstar- that is excellent advice!
I've met some really great people through the internet (and not really any creeps- I have a great "people filter" and always have), but online dating never worked for me. I really think it had to do with my insecurity regarding my weight.
Does anyone know of the dating site where you post the profile of a guy you know (friend, ex, brother, etc...) that you have "vetted" for other women? I'm trying to think of the name, but I'm drawing a blank! It seemed like a great concept.
Does anyone know of the dating site where you post the profile of a guy you know (friend, ex, brother, etc...) that you have "vetted" for other women? I'm trying to think of the name, but I'm drawing a blank! It seemed like a great concept.
Every decent guy that I've been matched with has hit "closed". 
