[QuilterInVA]

Judging by appearance should be on the bottom of your list. Judging by how healthy and fit you are should be foremost. I lost 200 pounds - yep, I've got some lose skin and I do work out. But I consider the skin to be my badge of honor. I'm healthier than most of my contemporaries who may look better but are on all kinds of medication. There really is not such thing as "normal" appearance - that is defined by the beholder and will differ from culture to culture and individual to individual. I don't want to just be another old lady in a wheel chair at the home - I want to be out and about and caring for myself all my life.

[midwife]

Originally Posted by ejm

well said midwife! (btw I am a big fan of your posts.. always a voice of reason.)

Thank you, and JayEll and Susan B, too. You guys are very sweet.

[YP1]

In terms of normal, that's not my aim any more. Normal tends to mean slightly overweight, unfit and not as healthy as I am now. So why would I want to be that.

But in terms of where you can be after a large weight loss, you can definitely be as fit as someone who's never been fat. I joined a running club a few months ago. Not only am I one of the stronger female runners there, no-one has guessed or suspects (or if they do suspect they've never mentioned it to me) that I used to be 260lb. I was talking to someone on a run once and admitted to it. She asked why I started running, I said it was to lose weight. She looked at me in horror and said there was no way I needed to lose weight. I explained that this was the after body not the before one and told her how big I used to be. The look on her face was priceless.

In terms of skin and shape, I'm probably not as toned as someone who's never been fat. My stomach can look a bit baggy when I stand in certain positions, and when I'm doing press ups or certain yoga poses you can see a bit of skin hanging down. But under clothes it's fine, and it doesn't stop me wearing a bikini if I want to. My boobs have all but disappeared. They weren't huge in the first place, and now they're rather minimal. If I stand in a certain way while wearing a sports bra which flattens them even more my bottom rib sticks out as far as my boobs, giving me a bizarre four bump look. But then it's good for running (less bounce!) and I can get by with a bit of padding in my bra.

[shrinkingchica]

Originally Posted by JayEll

With regard to shrinkingchica's remarks--

Let's not get into whether members are "fat" or not. Just don't go there. Some of us feel "fat" with 15 pounds to lose, others convince themselves they are not "fat" when they have 60 pounds to lose. We're here to support each other! Cheers to all!

Jay

My point was that if you only have to lose 30-40lbs you aren't going to have all of the extra skin and stretch mark issues that those of us with 100+ weight loss have to deal with.
And with regard to gamerchick's original post-----that is the main thing that can "give" one away when naked.
It is just a different body story when one is at a higher weight-----which is why there is a 300+ support forum to deal more specifically with a base of posters who have that extra baggage (meaning other issues like skin) to deal with.

[sweet_talker]

Originally Posted by ennay

when you get near goal...go to some place that allows nudity. I am going to put in a flat out plug for breitenbush hot springs in oregon. they have women only weekends. They only allow nudity in the hotsprings, it isnt a nudist camp. It is a retreat.

Anyway the first time my "cant change in the locker room" friend went she wore a swimsuit in the springs. But that weekend she was "confronted" by the site of probably 60 different women from 20-75, from size 0 - 30, flat chested - voluptuous, and she realized that we are ALL beautiful women and NO ONE has a "perfect" body

It was very therapeutic

heck..why wait for goal...learn how beautiful you are NOW. Its easier to take care of your body when you stop hating it.

wow that is a really creative way to be more comfortable with your body. that would actually be kinda cool.

and to SusanB, I always read through every post on a board before posting, that way I know what's been said (so that I don't repeat it) and I have a better grasp as to where the thread is heading (sometimes it gets to be about something else a little different from the poster topic).

[BerkshireGrl]

Originally Posted by Cheryl14

...varicose veins... one in my left leg that bulges out about 1/2 inch around my ankle to over 3/4 inch by the time it reaches behind my leg by my calf. By the time it reaches the thigh level it protrudes almost AN INCH! I have to be careful even when I shave my legs that I don't slice into it! ... I don't really want any more surgery -particularly ELECTIVE surgery... no matter how much I lose, I will STILL have very ugly-looking legs!

Cheryl,

I had a really bad varicose vein stripped from my left leg a few years ago at age 30 (they run in my dad's family.) It was a simple day surgery, with a spinal block (though I was "knocked out" too with drugs but not deeply). Mine ran from my calf to my upper thigh, and I was left with about 6-8 half-inch incisions, sewn up, then my leg was wrapped in a giant ace bandage for a few days to prevent swelling.

I walked out of the hospital that afternoon, up stairs to my apt., and had no real problem healing up. I didn't have any real pain; I was prescribed Vicodin but didn't use any.

This is all to say, I think you should go for it!

My BCBS HMO even covered the cost 100% after my doc recommended it because my leg ached and the vein was getting bigger with time; I called her to talk it over and she said she'd sign off on it with no problem. I was getting to the point where I didn't want anyone to see my leg, so I know how you feel...

There was no way I was going to let it turn into the huge knotted mess my father had on his calf; it looked like a big mass of blue linguine stuck under his skin (He also got his removed later.)

[ennay]

lol I hardly ever read every post, just dont have the time, so I often repeat

[sweet_talker]

Hey, to each his own I find it almost therapeutic.