Kel~ thx for the encouragement!!! i think i have finally come to a point in my life where i really do believe i finally deserve it. it was like through everything that i have been through i feel like eating and being overweight is what made me feel safe. but the time as come when i need to get over the past and finally look to the future!
Mikayla~ ya i think im going to try eating less more times a day bc i dont think im doing this right lol i think i need to add way more protein also.
Gracie~ thank you!!!! sooo much
all of you ladies are truely a huge inspiration to me!!! for once i see a glimpse of hope.
im the girl that never follows through on things and if it scares me or i dont wanna talk about i push it to the side and i dont deal with it until it has completely went on a downward spiral and it racing out of control...............hence the weight. I looked at a picture of myself from the holidays and realized OMG Nikki that is REALLY you. It scared the **** (sorry) out of me! I used to describe myself as "thick" like i sadi in my original post.............now I'm seriously morbidly obese. I keep thinking to myself when the **** did this happen, how did it happen. But it is now time that i step up to the plate and take responsibility for my own actions and get healthy!!!!!!!! how exciting, but oooooo soooo scary lmao.
ok sorry for rambling ladies just needed to be honest with myself and it seems like here is the only place i cando that without judgement!!!!
See you all tomorrow!
**spreading pound shedding dust on all of you!!!!!!
although he is supporting me through this journey, last night while he was eating mozzerella sticks and hot wings i felt like he was taunting me lol. i felt super jealous. i know he wasnt doing it on purpose and he should not have to suffer bc im dieting, i think the lack of fat and grease and pop is getting to my head lol. if anyone has some good weight wacher recipes i would be soooo thankful if you shared them with me!!
