Hey everyone! My name is Nikki and I am 26 yrs old. I am extremely overweight and have recently made the decision to make a change! I am consumed by so many emotions right now. I'm excited, scared, the feeling of overwhelming doubt, happiness, disappointment, but the most important feeling to me is the feeling of FINALLY being ready to do something about it. I was blaming everyone but myself. I was the one who did this nobody else. I was never ever a lil girl i was always the "thicker" one. I have gone from "thick" to "crazy thick" lol. I'm always called the cute one or people will say "you have such a pretty face" or "if you lost the weight you have no idea how pretty you would be". I'm extremely outgoing and have never let my weight discourage me from my social life or anything like that. I was in a very abusive realtionship for 10 yrs (yes, i said 10 yrs......almost half of my life), we lived together for 5 yrs and it all went down hill from there.

He was extremley abusive mentally, physically,emotionally. I gave him complete control of my life. The only thing I THOUGHT i had full control over was EATING, so I ate and ate and ate. Not to mention I'm an emotional eater anyways. He called me horrible names and after time I began to believe him. Long story short I worked up the courage and I left. I moved home with my mom. Still depressed I continued to eat and eat and eat! Burger King was my BFF lol. Oh ya did I mention I am a Sprite addict?! So the pounds kept packin on!

That was 3 years ago, let me fast forward to today. I am currently in another relationship, have been for about a yr and a half. It is a "normal" healthy relationship and he is supportive of my decisions. I still live at home with my mom. I have a good job that I have been at for 3 yrs. NOw to the problem......Ive gained around 30 lbs in 3 yrs!!!!!!!!!!! I have come to a point in my life where it is NECESSARY for a change! I am willing to stick to it! I am willing to do anything I possibly can to loose this weight! I have decided to do the points system with weight watchers (not officially bc money is tight at the moment) but follow it the best I can without joining, and cut pop COMPLETELY out of my life! I REFUSE to drink my calories anymore I was drinking close to 90 oz of pop a day which is roughly around 1400 calories in pop alone!!!!! O my goodness what was I thinking...........well I'll tell you what I was thinking........"I wont gain weight, I'm active enough that it wont affect me" ummmmmm ya I was WRONG!!!!!!! It definatley snuck up on me and attached itself to my booty, my belly, my arms, my thighs.......lets face it EVERYWHERE lol. I want to be healthy. I want to be toned. I want to be beautiful inside and out. I want to live , and thats the bottom line I want to live. I hope to one day have a family and being this overweight that dream seems far far away! So I hope to become accountable and learn how to do this the healthy way. If anyone has any advice I am like a sponge (no pun intended) I'm ready and I am willing to accept any help anyone has to offer. Please add me as a friend or feel free to email or im me at [email]. Ilook forward to meeting all of you and hearing your stories as well!!!! Spreading pound shedding dust on all of you!!!!!!!

This is a great community and you'll find lots of support and good ideas. My advice: Take it one day at a time. Write down everything you eat. Be gentle with yourself. This is a process and it takes time to learn a new way of living. Good luck chica!

thank you so so much!!!! I commented on one of your posts earlier today and forgot to tell you that I love the idea of your reward system!!! such a great idea!!! pamper yourself girl you deserve it!!!

I'm glad you're here!

I'm starting to take the first steps too... finally! We weigh just about the same, so I know of all of the struggles. We're all in this together!

Good luck to you!

Welcome, Nikki! I just rejoined here myself, determined to kick the weight to the curb this time around. Good luck, and also congratulations to you on getting out of that bad relationship! I know it's not easy, and it takes a lot of strength to walk away. But doing it makes you a stronger person, and if you're someone who can do that, then surely you can triumph over your weight as well, right?

i love it here already lol! i know the whole leaving the bad realtionship made me a stronger woman BUT for some reason i dont feel so strong in the "dieting" part of my life. anyone have any will power they can spare to share lol

good for you!!!!!!!!! i hope everything works out really well for you!!!

Hi Nikki!!

That feeling of finally being ready to take control is awesome, isn't it?? I'm so glad you've joined us in this journey! You're in the presence of so much inspiration, useful information and motivation and you've already taken steps in the right direction.

See you around!

thx for all the support! i know i keep reading everyones threads and blogs and im becoming more and more motivated! I need to get over thinking that loosing the weight will never happen to me and that it only happens to everyone else. Its super hard to believe that I 2 can be healthy and fit. Its almost scary to think that when people look at me they will see me for me not bc im obese. i cant wait for that day to come!!!!

Welcome Nikki!
I want to let you know that I am rooting for you!

Good luck! You *can* do this!

Jewels~ thank you so much it really means alot to have your support!!!

Tyler~ Thank you also very much!!!

I see everyones progress and it inspires me!! I just need some tips and advice on how not to be so darn hungry lol! how did everyone do it???

Welcome, Nikki, I'm so glad you are here! (((HUGS))) I'm a newbie too and finally fed up with the health problems I have been having due to my weight.

Congratulations to you for leaving the abusive relationship. I know how hard that was. I was in one of those too and finally left (thank goodness.) It was so hard but it was the best decision I ever made in my life. There is another poster who posted on this site recently, it was a thread like "I just want this marriage to end" or something like that, I was wondering....if you have some free time or feel like it, could you give some advice to that young lady who is struggling in an abusive relationship right now and trying to decide what to do? Hearing your experiences might really help her. I've been praying for her and am very worried for her. I don't usually ask people I've just met to do things, LOL, but you can understand why I am worried for her.

You are going to be successful! Trust me, if you have the strength to leave a bad relationship, you have the strength to conquer any mountain!

The people here are so wonderful, and I know you will make it!

The only other thing I can add is, if one type of dieting doesn't work for you - if you get cravings and can't stay on the diet because you are too hungry or something - please don't give up. A different type of diet might work for you instead. We each have to learn over time what works best for our bodies and our personalities, and it can be discouraging at times. I finally (after 48 years, LOL) learned what works for my body so I'm really excited, but I can't tell you how many diets I failed at before. Oh, well, it's not how many times you fall down, it's how many times you get up, LOL!

Welcome, and best of luck on your journey to the healthiest and happiest you!

Lori~ awe your so sweet thank you so much for the kind words!!! I got chills when you asked me to talk to that girl bc around the holidays I was telling my mom that I felt like I was finally ready to tell my story bc i thought maybe it would help someone. obviously it goes into alot more detail then what i told in my mini blog lol but i would def like to talk to her. do you rememebr how long ago it was??? i will do it when i get home tonight bc im still at work lol but this site is actually really addictive. Do you or anyone else have facebook??? you can find me on there also.

Hi, Nikki, it's so wonderful that you want to use your experience to help others! I volunteered at women's shelters because I wanted to help too.

The post was a very recent one...I think it was under General Chatter...take a glance at the first couple of pages of that section of the site, I'm sure it's still there....she hasn't posted for awhile but I know she is reading, and thinking about things, I'm sure of it...

Best of luck to you on your journey! I'm so excited for you!

I'm excited for me, too. For the first time in my life I figured out what works for me - low carbing keeps me from being hungry/having cravings - and I feel I could keep this up forever because it's so easy! So once you figure out what system or what diet works best for your metabolism etc., you are home free so to speak!