here are some jokes for you first off
Kids
#1. POLICE
While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I
was
interrupted by a little girl about six years old. Looking up and
down
at
my uniform, she asked, "Are you a cop?" "Yes," I answered and
continued
writing the report. "My mother said if I ever needed help I should
ask
the police. Is that right?" "Yes, that's right," I told her. "Well,
then," she said as she extended her foot toward me, "would you
please
tie my shoe?"
#2. K-9
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of
the
station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was
barking,
and
I saw a little boy staring in at me. "Is that a dog you got back
there?"
he
asked. "It sure is," I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and
then
towards the back of the van. Finally he said, "What'd he do?"
#3. ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly
shut-ins, I used to take my four-year-old daughter on my afternoon
rounds.
She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age,
particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her
staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced
myself
for
the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and
whispered,
"The
tooth fairy will never believe this!"
#4. DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she
saw
her
dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that
suit."
"And why not, darling?" "You know that it always gives you a
headache
next
morning."
#5. DEATH
While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our
minister
heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt.
Apparently, his five-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead
robin.
Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a
small
box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the
disposal
of
the deceased. The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate
prayers
and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his
father
always said: "Glory be unto the Faaaather and unto the Soonnn and
into
the
hole he gooooes."
#6. SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm not
going
to
school anymore, I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother.
"I
can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk!"
#7. BIBLE
A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he
fingered
through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He
picked
up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had
been dried, "hey mom I found adams fig leaf"
Now, Meme, you have to do what you believe is right for yourself and your grandson. I agree with that; but that is more than enough for you to handle. I know you love them all, but keep Ross and let the others find responsible day care for them. Whatever, I just hope you feel better soon. Did you get the Bluestuff yet? Does it work for you as well?
Candice - My last pair of shoes, my ecco's cost me $165.00; however, they have a wide toebox and a narrow heel, so I can keep them on. I have a narrow foot and it isn't that easy to find shoes in this city. Most everyone carries medium width and they are just to wide and sloppy. I have had my easyspirit dress shoes for years. They have a 11/2 inch heel and I can wear them for the day if I must. Since I started staying home 6 years ago, my foot has changed somewhat. My cousins wears those Birkenstock things. I absolutely hate them. They are so uncomfortable to me. I prefer Clarks sandles and shoes. They are made in England and pretty comfortable. However, if you can ever find shoes made in Spain or Brazil, the leather in incredibly soft. Enough about shoes!!! I hope you are feeling better now.
Ally - shoes are covered above
The wedding sounds kind of 'snobbish' I guess is the word I would use. Hope you enjoyed it, however. Don't be dissatified with what you have! Quite often people who seem to have everything, lack some of the more important nonmaterial goods - like happiness, love of self or anyone else (they do tend to love money above all).
Mima - glad you are getting everything together. I will never be size 8. I used to wear a 12 and that was great for me. When I got down to a 10, I had a terrible time finding any clothes to wear. I would, however, like to get back to my size 12. Your dress sounds so pretty. Please have some pictures taken and then send them to Meme, so we can all see them.
Joanne - Hi. Hope your day is going well and that you are enjoying your nice warm weather. I am enjoying mine. It is going to be 50 by the afternoon. Next week it will be time to get out the deck chairs and sit outside. Can't wait.
Well, have a wonderful Easter, in case I don't get on here to much until next Monday. Have a busy few days ahead of me. My daughter and grand daughter are coming tomorrow, and my son on Saturday, and then 20 others for Easter Dinner on Sunday. By Monday, I may not have the strength to get on here
Hello
And I don't think it smells bad at all! As a matter of fact, I kind of like the smell.
Hello
you think you would just drop those unwanted pounds!
No matter what you ate..I think it is all the meds you take!
