Creative? Probably. I invite you to read my daughter's blog--it's just the start in a work in progress on her honors paper: Dana Linnell

Let me know what you think.

FWIW, Becky, you have just perfectly described my older son within our family dynamics. How am I handling it? Frankly, I am living for the end of this school year. I'm exhausted from trying to push a boulder up a mountain.

Ultimately, there will be a point when the fire to succeed has to come from within. We can't be the fire for them.

Personally I am just having faith that something will click.

Have you considered a charter school that includes more creative outlets?

midwife - Try not to laugh. We yanked him out of public school midway through 5th grade for a couple of reasons. First, he'd discovered that all he had to do is be ever-so-slightly above average, and everyone would think he was wonderful. On top of that, I was correcting the teacher's corrections to his homework - and, well, I was being a bit of a pest about it. I had this bizarre belief that a teacher should be able to demonstrate proper grammar and decent math skills. Plus, he was bored to the point of blacking out. He's in a fabulous private school now where the focus is laser-on, and the pressure to do just a little better is consistent. In many cases, he's easily risen to the new standards. He qualifed for the NUMATS program (academic talent search) based on his vocabulary and writing/editing skills. The headmistress (PhD in pediatric neuroscience plus another in education) called it pretty well - he's a total perfectionist to the point where if he thinks there's a risk of not getting it right, he freezes. Soooo, we got a bit of a lecture about letting him screw up so that he could find out it's not fatal or humiliating. We have truly tried to follow the instructions - but the "not doing it at all" is a whole different animal from going wild, going out of the box, and taking a risk around what the teacher wants. He's dabbling in the areas of behavior that get one fired out in the real world. And if he doesn't find the inner drive by 9th grade, he'll be in public school where he'll just get lost in the masses again. Angst!

Allison - I will definitely get there to the blog, on Monday. I want to have time to really enjoy it with full attention. My kid's new English teacher asked him to give her a copy of a short story he did on a sledding accident he had when he was 3 - she loves it and thinks she'd like to try to talk him into refining it for competition (tentative title - "The day I bit the bench").

Onward! Thanks for letting me vent - and I'm still scavenging for ideas!

Becky

Having a label, whatever it is, can really narrow horizons for a child. Labels like bright, lazy, gifted, above-average, slow, good, ****-raiser: any of them can do it. And if you start to feel as though you are being pushed along a road chosen by someone else according to the label you’ve been given by someone else, well, that’s not good.

I’m very keen on giving children space. Not over-scheduling them. And not very much time in front of screens. Time to smell the roses and observe the hawk.

I think practical work is very good for children. They can make mistakes and discover ‘rules’ and ‘laws’ and ‘principles’ for themselves. Things don’t have to be ‘right’. If you are building a den, you don’t have to get all the angles just so. It teaches patience and problem-solving. And a bit of who you are and how to live with yourself (a life’s work, as we know).

Full disclosure: I have a boy who’s 11 and rather bright. He spends quite a lot of time mooning around outside with a knife or other tools. He also noodles on the piano quite a bit. Although I’m interested in how he does at school, I tend to be a bit unfocused about his achievements. I suppose that’s on purpose because I know he doesn’t like to stand out and nor do I. So I know he got 100% in three subjects in the last exams but I’m not entirely sure what they were. At home, we do things in a broad project way. As an example, we’ve read French comic books together since he was tiny and I yack in French a bit. This Easter we went off to France together, wandered around in French and played a lot of crazy golf in French. My SO is a software developer and they play chess together, as much to keep the SO’s brain operational as anything else. They’ve always done hard puzzles together for this reason.

I could probably say a bit more but I have to go off to another part of the forest to earn a crust. Becky. You are not alone.

I'm making it official. The last 2 days, I have weighed in at 120.4 and 120.2 respectively. I am considering this "close enough" to goal that I've tentatively declared victory, on Memorial Day. And here I figured I would start another new "5 to 10 pounds" thread, since this one is up to 12 pages now. But I guess I'll let someone else have that honor.

For the record, I haven't binged since early May, got (back) to 123 on 5/16, and have steadily been dropping calories and upping exercise since then, a bit at a time. One week ago I was at 121.5, and against my husband's wishes, I dropped calories to 1000/day just for this week, along with one hour of HIIT/cardio every day. I got a whoosh to 120.6 on Friday, then the above as described.

I suspect I'll bounce up again as I move back to a more maintenance-level number of calories, but I'm ready to call this close enough, and work on the last pound or two again in a slower way if I have to. Now, on to more of the same, as I complete my transition to long-term maintenance. Thanks for the support ladies- I know I've been a whiner. For the record though, it took me over 4 months to drop the last 5 pounds- a ridiculously long time.

I also may drop off this thread until I need it again. I'm not sure how/why my weight is dropping but this morning it was an all time low of 120.2. I'm sure it will be way up tomorrow as I bought some very yummy stuff to make for dinner. I really don't want to be this low and I think it is due to my new thyroid meds. They are helping my other "issues" so I hope I don't have too much. If I keep dropping I'll call the doctor. Otherwise I have follow up bloodwork in a month or so. Just so weird to see such a low number on the scale. I was maybe 13 the last time I weighed that??

Well done, neuro! And good luck with maintaining. (FWIW, these threads can go up to 500 posts, I think.)

Michele - thyroid medication seems to cause difficulties from what I read here. See you in Moving.

I have been putting on weight or 'bouncing', shall we say. It's a combo of not enough exercise (knee-related), too much exercise making me tired and hungry (physio exercises), and eating too much (tired, slightly worried and bored). Oh yes, and we have a family wedding in early July. I told myself this could be a good goal. And immediately rebelled against it. I must pull myself together.

I have two goals that I'm working toward, Silverbirch. The first is my 30 year high school reunion the first weekend in August. The second is DH's family reunion in the middle of August. I hope by the first one I'll be back to 140.

I am cautiously back in my groove. Food on plan, exercise blossoming. It was a rough year in many ways. Summer couldn't have come soon enough!

Congrats to those moving on! And I'm glad I won't be a lone voice in the thread. Always nice to have company even though I wish we were all coasting at goal.

Sorry to hear about the rough year, midwife. Shall we both try to post here more regularly?

Allison, the problem with the wedding as a goal is that it is The Other Side Of The Family. I'd rather not go but we've agreed that we must. I stick out anyway so why stick out more by looking even more gorgeous than I do? I think that's part of my thinking.
I can't bear it.

Yes, I shall post more regularly.

Sorry the family is stressful, SB. Blah on them.

Thanks, midwife. Yes, Blah on them.

Boo for stress, yay for success! I think that just about covers everyone.

So after being out of town for a week, I had only gained 1lb, right? But then two days later my weight went up 2 more lbs and has stayed there since (probably thanks to excessive meals with family members). Starting today, back on track for me. 137.4 today. Goal is to hold steady between 133-134.

The lack of exercise due to all my various injuries is really throwing a kink into things. I went to a yoga class Saturday morning thinking it would be some good exercise without aggravating anything, but it really aggravated my wrists and forearms. Planning today on a trip to the gym for stationary bike. I figure if I use the upright stationary bike and lean forward so that my weight is more on my elbows, I should avoid aggravating my tailbone and my wrists. I guess we'll see.

Thinking about making an appointment with a rheumatologist. Not sure if I should go back to the guy I saw a few years ago or go to a new one.

And I will try to be more present as well. My story...same ole, same ole.
I know what to do, just need to do it. I have lost one or two real pounds. Now need the other 5-8.
Have learned that my new dog is a very good running partner, so that's one obstacle removed. The grabbing of snacks/kids' food which then leads to poor choices is what is doing me in. Okay, now it has been said out loud. (so to speak )
midwife, silver, chin up the year has passed- OMG, it has!
neuro, atta girl! nice work
Becky, yes those children will make us all want to stick forks into our own eyes! But it's b/c we love them sooo...
Allison, you are so on your way to hottie hottie goal weight
Jess, how are the meds doing?
Michele, how are the meds doing?
kramp, you once said your body wants to be 130s, mine does to. I want to be 120s. Think you do too.
And I am pretty certain I can, if I eat and move like I want that

onward, forward, downward, and so on.