After 10 months of abstinence I've let go of 60 lbs. Wow.
This weekend I cleaned out my closet and got rid of the last of the too big clothes. All of the clothes in my closet now fit. It's a far cry from when it was jam packed with 4 different sizes of everything.
Greater than the weightloss is the peace that I've found through program. I can enjoy parties, family gatherings, and even time alone without being compelled to eat. I don't have to eat to socialize, celebrate, think, prepare, work, or do anything else. I don't have to eat. Such freedom. Thank God for OA.
Thanks for posting that. That's awesome for you. What a good feeling to get rid of those clothes. 60 pounds. Have you ever lifted 60 pounds?
I feel like I am getting a real "taste" (pardon the pun) of what that feels like...to not have to eat to fill up the emptiness or to just cope in whatever situation. I still want to sometimes, but now I don't HAVE TO.
Tonight at my meeting someone who's been in program for a while said he'd had a bad day and a big disappoinment money wise. And yeah, he wanted to eat but he knew that if he ate, he'd have two problems instead of the one. Another woman said her sponsor told her that if bingeing on food was actually going to help her sponsees, she would tell them to do it, but in no case ever has bingeing on food ever helped someone in her years and years of helping people do program.
You let go of a lot of stuff. I'm guessing, but I imagine you need to let go of lots of ideas and thoughts that don't serve you well to be able to let go of 60 pounds.
I'm amazed every time I recognise how much mental work is involved in letting go of weight.
Congrats to all your hard work, physical, emotional and spiritual.
Hey Christy-
You are right. Through working the steps I learned to let go of lots of poisonous clutter. Habits, character defects, negative personality traits, defense mechanisms, ways of coping-- whatever you want to call them, I had to identify them, honestly own up to them, become willing to let them go, turn them over to God, and then make any necessary apologies. In order to continue to live in a state of recovery, I have to continue to do these things in my life everyday. As a matter of fact, I gave unsolicited advice yesterday, and once I realized (as soon as I let my mouth finally close), I promptly admitted what I had done and made amends with the person. Now, I don't have to carry that with me. I don't have to feel guilty today, wonder how she feels, play the tape over and over of what happened, eat over it, or anything else harmful.
Marny your posts are so encouraging. Sometimes (most times) I just don't want to do the hard work involved in changing habits etc., but you remind me that is worth it in the long run.
Thanks Joyfull. Somedays I don't feel like doing the work. Those are days that I KNOW I need to get to a meeting, call my sponsor, and read OA literature so that I can get my head back where it needs to be.
Marny, that is fantastic! Congratulations - what an enlightening journey you have had so far. YOU are how I WANT to be. It's all about honesty and ridding myself of those negative habits, thought processors and even people that I am in the process of.....I hope I can post something similar to this one day. You should be so proud of yourself.
Thanks, it is awesome. But, I can't take all the credit. I couldn't do it on my own. It was through God's grace and the support and help of OA that I am able to have a daily reprive from my food obsession. If I could do it all myself with self control, self will, and self motivation, then I wouldn't have spent the last 15 years fat and unhappy. Instead, I listen for God's will, let Him have control, and let Him be motivation.
Congrats marny...that's awesome. I would love to see before and after pics. I'm almost your same hieght and would love to look forward to what i might see if i'm patient. YEAAAAAAAAAAA you. good job. I have to admit i'm not using OA, don't feel at this time overeating is a problem for me (i just eat crappy..but not currently)...but saw your post and just had to say congrats. Congrats for finding something that helped you through it and getting your life in order. Inspiration to live up to. Thanks!
60 lbs lost
