I saw a person I know from work liking a group on Facebook called something along the lines of: you're not curvy, you're fat.
That really bothered me, because it's like saying you can be two things as a woman - fat or skinny, and fat people have to have big boobs and big bums, and skinny people have to be sticks. If there's one thing I've learned through dieting, it's that no matter what anyone's weight, there are very few people who have that 'ideal' female body shape of the hourglass figure with very little fat.
Also, this is probably out of line, but I get very very angry when I hear negative male opinions of one broad female body type. It really annoys me that they think I even care their opinions about liking girls with big butts, or hating thin girls. It just feels like they're taking the power away from women to decide what they want by making out it's all a big exercise to appeal to guys. If you're a guy, and you tell me you don't like women who describe themselves as curvy, expect to have my total contempt. It's one thing having an opinion, it's another thing acting like your body preference means anything to me, or expecting anyone to change to fit into what you think is acceptable from a woman.
I don't think you're out of line at all, Belease. I feel exactly the same way you do. Judging by outward appearance (beyond basic grooming and hygiene, which makes statements about the personality) is a pet peeve of mine.
As a recent high school graduate I "dated" a man who was more than willing to have, um, an adult relationship with me (I'm trying to be delicate) but wouldn't commit to calling me his girlfriend or investing anything emotionally in me. I weighed approximately 180 pounds at the time. Looking back, seeing pictures of myself then, I realize I wasn't even all that fat. But then one day he told me that if I lost weight, "we could make it full time," and then he demonstrated to me how he likes to position his arms when he holds "a girl." Any "girl" (another pet peeve--if she's over 18 she's a woman, not a girl) who didn't fit into that space inside his arms, apparently wasn't acceptable to him. This clearly told me I was a sex object to him, not a person. Last I ever saw of him.
Sorry about my own rant. Back to the original topic.
Last edited by LovebirdsFlying; 05-28-2010 at 11:15 AM.
As a recent high school graduate I "dated" a man who was more than willing to have, um, an adult relationship with me (I'm trying to be delicate) but wouldn't commit to calling me his girlfriend or investing anything emotionally in me. I weighed approximately 180 pounds at the time. Looking back, seeing pictures of myself then, I realize I wasn't even all that fat. But then one day he told me that if I lost weight, "we could make it full time," and then he demonstrated to me how he likes to position his arms when he holds "a girl." Any "girl" (another pet peeve--if she's over 18 she's a woman, not a girl) who didn't fit into that space inside his arms, apparently wasn't acceptable to him. This clearly told me I was a sex object to him, not a person. Last I ever saw of him.
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Hah! Did you tell him that the problem is with his arms, and not with you? His arms were too short. Anybody who would try something similar on me would quickly get an explanation about the shortcomings of his own body.
Hah! Did you tell him that the problem is with his arms, and not with you? His arms were too short. Anybody who would try something similar on me would quickly get an explanation about the shortcomings of his own body.
I do feel that the word 'curvy' is used too freely to describe women who are overweight. I would rather have someone describe me as overweight (or thick) than curvy. The word 'overweight' doesn't offend me because it feels like a clinical term, and it's true.
There are certainly women who are overweight who are also curvy -- who have a bigger waist-to-hip ratio and remain well-proportioned even with the extra pounds. However, I would say that the majority of women who are overweight don't maintain that waist-to-hip ratio. Most women who I truly consider 'curvy' are thin.
Speaking of euphemisms, I don't like the word "heavy-set." It's what other people say about a fat person when they're trying not to use the word "fat."
Some people do have a problem with "fat," though, since it is used so often as an insult. But then what would be wrong with "big" or "large" or "plus sized"? Why do we need words like "curvy" to try and mask the truth? We don't say "sky-colored eyes" when we mean blue. As long as no disrespect is intended, I don't see a problem with calling things exactly as they are. I'm a big (fat, large, plus-size) woman, and that's just a simple description.
Last edited by LovebirdsFlying; 06-03-2010 at 12:33 AM.
"seeking athletic, energetic young woman for long walks on the beach. . ."
In other words, I'd like to date someone barely over the age of 18 who wears a size 00 and likes public displays of affection.
I think when using terms such as athletic they mean thin, and curvy could come along with thin. Curvy to me means you have hips, and an indented waist, and a chest. This could come with thin or fat.
I absolutely HATE the word curvy. Lets be honest, people dont call fit or thin people with boobs and hips "Curvey" anymore. They say that person is athletic with great boobs or a banging body, or coke bottle or whateva.
I agree with the OP. it means too many things so you can't really tell what it means when someone says it. I don't like when it's used euphemistically.
When I was maybe 150 lbs, I considered myself "curvy." I had a chest and butt, but a small waist. Now, I would not, because I have no defined waist, yet a lot of people use "curvy" to just mean "big." When I think "curvy," I think hourglass, and it's possible to be a thin hourglass or a bigger hourglass.
I get offended at being called curvy, yes.
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Also, this is probably out of line, but I get very very angry when I hear negative male opinions of one broad female body type.
Not out of line at all, especially since most people do not have nearly the same standards for male body types (i.e., it's okay for a guy to have weight on him, yet guys can disrespect women by saying "no fat chicks!!!" and so on.) I understand the importance of physical attraction, but I like to think there is something more to interpersonal relationships than just the number on the scale or the clothing size. Disrespecting whole body types objectifies women and completely reduces them to objects existing to attract men, which is not acceptable.
I mean, we all have types of people we find attractive, but I would never say "I would never date a guy who was overweight/bald/red-haired" or whatever; I would hopefully get to know the person before judging on those qualities alone.
So I'm not in the norm (on finding the word curvy offensive) but that's ok...I think of myself and call myself curvy so if someone else says it to me, I'm ok with that. If they meant it in a deragatory way I'm still ok with that....I don't let others define me. I'm finally happy in my own skin (it took me 39.5 years to get there!) and that's all that truly counts (to me). I could be 100 lbs soaking wet and still be curvy...it's just how I'm made so why on earth would I get offended at someone calling me curvy? I just don't get it but ah well...to each their own!
Nobody is telling you that you can't like it, lol.
But this thread is a good representation of why I do not like it. Some people would be insulted if they were called curvy, some people would be complimented. To some it's a slender athletic body with boobs and hips. To some it's a nice way of saying overweight. To others a thin or fat woman can be curvy if she has a certain bust/waist/hip ratio.
It's not that I dislike MY OWN definition of curvy (womanly shapely figure, despite weight), I just dislike meaningless confusing words. Curvy has so many different meanings to different people that it's a useless word. I'd rather just say "I have a womanly shapely figure, and I like it" as opposed to "I am curvy." Because what the heck is curvy? It's different for everyone. Thus, the uselessness of the word annoys me.
Nobody is telling you that you can't like it, lol.
Nope, that's why I put a smiley. I do think it's likely the response to a thread is biased in favor of the thread title.
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Originally Posted by mkendrick
I'd rather just say "I have a womanly shapely figure, and I like it" as opposed to "I am curvy." Because what the heck is curvy? It's different for everyone. Thus, the uselessness of the word annoys me.
That's what I don't get. I don't see how womanly or shapely is any more well defined.
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