Slim - I'm 63 and I'm with you. A flat tummy is never going to happen again, and the arms still flap. But yup, it's sooo much better, and improves your health!

Bargoo - I have 3 friends - 2 with breast cancer, one with a rare kidney cancer - who have not lost any weight with treatment. OTOH, my DH lost - and kept off - over 40 lbs. I'm keeping you in my prayers.

To Circebee, YoYo and WaterRat, Thank you all for your good thoughts and prayers. They are greatly appreciated.

Thanks everyone for your comments! Kind of glad this is normal - I think I just thought I'd instantly get the toned tummy as soon as I hit goal.

Never that easy!

bargoo - I hope everything goes well for you.

I have gone below my goal weight by 5 or 6# but I still feel fat some days. My stomach and thighs are jiggly. My upper arms are saggy. I've always thought my butt is too big for my smallish waist. I have trouble finding jeans that fit, when they fit in the butt, they're too big in the waist.

I know my self image does not reflect what I look like though. I had a co-worker the other day take me aside and tell me she was concerned and warned me not to lose any more weight. (I'm not trying to - I eat South Beach diet and eat high quality, very filling foods and do not have any trouble filling up.) I am amazed at the size of clothes I wear (2-4 in jeans) since I certainly don't think I look like I would wear that size.

It's hard to wrap my head around it most of the time. I'm actually self-conscious about it when my friends at work comment on my figure. Sometimes I get annoyed with it and would like them to stop with the comments. I do not like attention drawn to myself and find it embarrassing. :(

Robsia -- I'm two pounds from goal and I definitely am not satisfied with how I look either, particularly naked. In street clothes I think I look fine. But I've stil got lots of things I want to work on!

I feel like several others -- I have my "fat" days and thin days. I weigh less now than most of my adult life, but I still have days that I just feel pudgy and out of control. My body still isn't "perfect", and it never will be. I can't help being a pear-shape, and some areas are saggy. (partly due to weight loss and partly to middle-age!) I still continue to work on it through diet and exercise and I think I've come to terms with the fact that I'll never be model-perfect. But I'm pretty doggone good for an old, short chick!!

I've found that the way I feel about my body is directly related ton the way I'm feeling in general. If I'm having a good day, I feel great about it - but if my day goes badly, my mind compounds my weight into what's stressing me.

I'm sure flabby arms will be part of story until the end. That and a saggy butt. I do get a flat tummy when I dip below 140, so I concentrate on that! I love it when the waistband of my pants isn't tight so who cares if I'm not as skinny as I wish I were. I simply concentrate on my assets rather than my deficits.

I'm one of those folks whose body shape image is thinner than their current actual shape. Even at my HW I felt thin. But when I forced myself to face facts and stared at the rolls in the mirror, I realized how much I needed to lose weight.

My original goal weight of 150 was on the conservative side, so it's not surprising I was disappointed with my shape at that weight. But as I approach my revised goal (I weighed 140 this AM, but not an official weigh-in), I am still disappointed. No rolls any more (yay!!!) but I still have my midlife, post-pregnancy poochy belly in addition to the fat inner thighs I had even as a slim young adult.

But as soon I step away from the mirror, I go back to feeling like I am thin. Until the next time.

Great topic! Most days I feel great - healthy & strong - and that's always been my primary goal. I have had to adjust to my naked body and I'm still not completely comfortable with it. I guess its a work in progress. I was laughing a couple of days ago because I was wearing size 4 pants (after being in a 24, tight) and thinking my a** looked big. How is that possible?! As others have said when we have been significantly overweight and for a long time our bodies will never look quite like those toned, naturally thin gals, even in the same size. I can live with that but it does still surprise me sometimes.

Bargoo - My thoughts are with you :hug:

I am the same. I am 113, sounds skinny right? But sometimes, I don't feel it. My stomach is still far from flat and my thighs and arms flabby. I am however still exercising, and trying to add toning exercises to change that.
Before I lost weight, when people complained about feeling fat at say, 115, I would be thinking to myself
'These people are attention seekers! They know full well they are not fat, they want nothing but compliments'

But I can understand where they are coming from now.

Um, I guess I'm in the minority here. I don't think women in general are meant to have flat stomachs. Our genetics just aren't geared toward that, they are geared towards bearing children (sorry that's just how I feel it is.) Even models get airbrushed to look perfect.

I've never had a flat stomach, even when I was much thinner then my current goal weight. I have somewhat chunky thighs too. That's just my body. Don't get me wrong, I have days where I'm unsatisfied with my unclothed body, but most days I like my body just fine. I don't feel stressing over it is going to solve anything.

I just think that western society puts too much emphasis on an unattainable perfection when it comes to body image. Learn to love your body as much as possible, if you want to improve it through exercise, that's a great goal, but don't go into it expecting perfection that isn't possible.

bargoo~ Sorry to hear about the treatments you're going through! :hug:

Yes, I was dissapointed after losing weight. I am still dissapointed but I have learned to accept who I am. I started at 5'10 225lbs and now I'm 140lbs. The problem is that I still have a gut and lost all the weight on my arms and face so I look like a skelton but a big gut, lol. Its been 5 years now and I've managed to stay on track so I am happy. I've also learned that I am never happy with anything, which I think has helped me be so successful in life because I always strive to do better.

BTW I am a guy. Too bad there isn't a site named three fat guys, lol

I made a discovery last night.

I met up with a guy I had been chatting to for some time on the internet. I felt very comfortable with him and told him all about my weight loss. I pointed to a girl in a bar who was rahter large and said I had been bigger than her.

His response - "So what?"

He said it was all about what was inside, he'd still like me no matter what size I was, and he had been out with girls much bigger than the girl I had pointed out.

So suddenly I feel a whole lot better about my slightly saggy belly.

Yep, apparently I expected that when I lost weight I'd look like my memory as an in-shape 20 year old. Since I focused on being fat, I had overlooked that simultaneously while gaining weight, I was getting older. And an older male body isn't so great to look at in the best of times, LOL. DW just laughs at me when I complain at my image in the mirror.

Big Kudos for staying on track for 5 years. That puts you in a very small group of successful maintainers.

Yep, it'd be nice to have a "three fat guys", but we'll just have to support each other at our chance encounters here on 3FC. What's the secret of your success for so long?