Lily, Take control! Healthy boundaries, gal! We need to love our family and be kind to our family. But love and kindness are NOT THE SAME AS letting yourself be used and abused. Her behavior is TOTALLY inappropriate. If she feels unloved when you set healthy boundaries, that is HER ISSUE and one that SHE REALLY SHOULD RESOLVE! I'd definitely get your DH on the same page as you, though, so you can present a united front. And, if you absolutely are unable to get her OUT of the house, I would set rules like:
1) You don't babysit, except by appointment.
2) It is your house, your kitchen, and YOUR FOOD RULES! (Therefore, no chocolate covered caramels, no fried food, etc.) (Just think, would it be appropriate for someone to set a six-pack of beer in front of an alcoholic?)
3) A LIMIT for length of stay.
PLEASE, set some healthy boundaries! It could not possibly hurt this relationship more than she is already hurting it by her actions!
I completely agree with Slim Lindy. This is YOUR home and YOUR weight loss - no one else has the right to come in and mess up what you've worked so hard to accomplish. Tough love!
She is filling both the kids bottles with the skim milk. (the baby 8 mos. is supposed to be on formula) and she is adding chocolate syrup to their bottles. No wonder they don't sleep worth a crap. I told her they don't need chocolate and she said "I'm not gonna deprive my kids just because you are on a diet".
I cooked Oats for breakfast this morning and gave some to the 2 yr. old. He never tried a bite, just pushed it away. Because she said "son, you don't have to eat that, it's grandma's yucky diet food".
This is just about the saddest thing I've read today. Sounds like borderline child abuse to me.
Brrrrrrr ... Baby, it's cold outside. I can't really see much of anything on the ground, but I can hear the ping ping ping of ice hitting the windows. Gimme snow any time.
Made it to the gym for the first time in nearly a month yesterday and it sure felt good. As soon as I finish this, I'm going to go get on ye olde treadmill for 45 minutes. Even with the weather, the world is looking much better now that I can work out again. I hope everyone who is not feeling up to snuff makes a speedy recovery and can resume their regular routines.
I don't know how non-exercisers do it. I maintain at about 1500 calories (net) a day. When I exercise, I burn anywhere from 200 to 400, which means I can eat 1700 to 1900, and on many days, those extra 200 calories make a HUGE difference. But then, it's funny -- lots of times when I could "legally" eat 1700, I stop at around 1200. Go figure. Whatever the case, my weight is staying pretty much within a 2-pound swing, which is great. This spring, I'd like to whittle away more of my tummy fat but that will be easier when I don't find myself yearning for the comfort foods of winter.
We're also awaiting some weather here, but we've got thunderstorms, downpours, and tornadoes instead of snow to watch out for on the Gulf coast. I pulled all the plants out into the open last night. They love rain so much more than chlorinated hose/tap water.
There's a 5K a few blocks from my house in 2 1/2 weeks, and another a few towns away the first weekend in April. I'm going to try and do both of them this year. Last year, I wasn't in the best running shape, but I can do it this year! Running seems to burn calories better for me than any other activity, and it's the only thing that banishes that darn belly chublet. I just have to watch my knees and not over-do it.
Lily, I'm adding my good vibes to the stream whisking its way around the country towards Oklahoma! Ugh. Ugh ugh. You are not SD's dumping ground/childcare provider/emotional punching bag/etc.! I hope you are able to resolve the situation.
Tara, the morning classes at my gym are much less crowded, too, so I've heard. But I can only go to the evening ones. I do absolutely hate to miss them, though! I've been on a step class kick lately. Hope you can fill your morning time in a satisfying way.
I hope the morning sickness eases for you preggo ladies.
Hi everyone else. I hope you're all having a good week!
Hi ladies, nothing has changed around here yet, but I have a plan. I'm going to have DH call his mother and have her invite them to her house. Everyone keep your fingers crossed. Thanks for all the good vibes.
My scale was up a lb. this AM to 144. I'm surprised it's not worse than that. I am still using Fitday and counting every single calorie. I've had 1700-1800 for the last few days. I'm ignoring everyone and getting on treadmill with the music blaring. If I'm annoying enough maybe things will change. LOL. I have also resorted to just hiding out in my bedroom with door locked and reading a good book.
Has anyone else noticed that after losing weight they have a hugely prominet xyphoid? Mine sticks out a good 2 inches when I'm laying down and my belly looks sunk in. I don't at all think there is anything wrong, I just didn't realize my bones were so big. I hadn't seen them in so long, maybe they were always like this and were just buried under fat. Same thing goes for my clavicles, shoulder blades, hip bones and ribs. It is so strange. Even my pubic bone is sticking out. I know that I'm in no means underweight, I just feel very bony. But, it's a good feeling.
I'm happy to report that out of a total of 13 puppies, that I am down to just 1 puppy now.
Lily~ I hope your plan works. You need your sanity. And hiding in your room reading a book is a great idea!!! I've been known to do that, too! (Whatcha reading?) I bet it's a little sad to see the puppies go. I can't say that my xiphoid sticks up any, but I sure do love the fact that I can see my ribs!!!
Robin~stay warm!!! I'm really a non-exerciser who is trying to become an exerciser. I've been reading the post "anyone else excited to exercise" and can't really imagine getting excited to exercise. I think I'm just a lazy butt!! Anyway, both this time and the last time I lost weight, I did it mostly without exercising and had no trouble doing it. The last time, I did start exercising as soon as the weight was off as a way of keeping it off (I kept it off for 5 years). Stress made it come back on. Anyway, I tried to exercise last month and managed to exercise 5 days a week for the whole month and didn't lose a pound. I think I'm psyching myself into believing that I should wait until I finish these last few pounds before I get into an exercise routine. I'd love to have someone to exercise with--perhaps that would help, but DH isn't much help and DD doesn't want her Mom hanging out with her at the gym.
Megan~good luck on the 5k. You runners make me envious. Yes, really, I wish I could run (runners are always so lean!!).
Allison, thanks. Right now I am re-reading Thin For Life. It didn't apply to me much when I was on Atkins, so I'm liking it much better this time.
My plan worked. I called DH while hiding in a bathroom and he wasn't mad at all. He is tired of the chaos too. He called his mom. She called here and asked Sam to come stay for a few days and help her with housework. Said she will pay her, so SD is leaving tonite with kids. Yippee.
It is sad to see the puppies go. I am keeping the last female. I named her Lucy. OMG, I was spending $100.00 per week on good puppy food the last several weeks. I gave the runt away because I knew no one wanted to pay for him. He was so cute, but tiny. Only 4 lbs. and the others were 15-16 lbs. I loved the pups but it was a lot of work. With the expense of mama's vet bills , the food and the shots on all the pups, I really didn't make hardly any profit, but that is OK. I did enjoy it. It gave me something to do. I'm just happy that I had good homes lined up for all of them.
LOL, allison, I love to feel my ribs. It feels so neat. The only downside is that my butt is so bony that sitting in the floor or on bleachers is very uncomfortable.
I did really good food-wise yesterday. I was so stressed out and actually thought about going to the pizza hut and ordering a pizza and eating as much as I possibly could. But, I didn't do it. Instead I cooked a big pot of beans. SD hates beans. LOL.
LOL, allison, I love to feel my ribs. It feels so neat. The only downside is that my butt is so bony that sitting in the floor or on bleachers is very uncomfortable.
DS is in Karate and I have to sit on a wooden bench for 45 minutes while he is in class--OMG my butt hurts after that!!! I guess I should look into exercises that will boost the old gluteus maximus!!!
Hi to allthe other maintainers. Currently I'm feelding cruddy..combination of an introduction to a new boss who immediately started talking into the direction of why I did not quit this job, and the flu that DS has, I think. When I came home after the talk I just crawled into bed. I'm now feeling a bit better after a nap & a cup of hot tea.
Pat, if you can send butt over, why not donate some to charity?? I bet a lot more people would be interested!
Pat, thanks for the offer, but I can't afford more new jeans. The ones I have now are made for gals without a butt. LOL.
Well my company didn't leave yesterday like they were supposed to because it was snowing. I expect them gone today. Right now they are all piled up all over my living room. I did tell her yesterday that if she comes back here after going to my MIL's that her and the kids have got to use the spare bedroom. I hate it when anyone sleeps in my living room. It is totally unnecessary. As I said my DH was supportive of sending them to his mom's. But, he sounded irked last night when I complained that she keeps leaving for 2-3 hrs. at a time and leaving the kids with me without asking. He just said "OK, I get the point". I told him he better say something to her before I do and really pi@@ her off.
Rabbit sorry to hear you and your son are feeling poorly. Me and DD just got over the flu and it was definitely not fun. My neighbors kids all have it now.
Me, a "lean" runner! I'm more of a "somewhat less jiggly than a few years ago" runner. And I can loan ya'll some booty if you need it. Boy would I be rich if I could sell it on ebay! And hips...and belly... yeah I'm definitely a pear shape. My upper body is a little more bony and my lower is still plushy. I admit to buying shirts that show my collarbones off, though!
Rabbit your new boss sounds obnoxious. Grrr. Your nap and tea de-stresser sounds lovely. I'll try to remember that idea next time I'm stressed.
Lily, yay, SD is gone! Excellent plan. Way to resist the pizza idea. Your puppies sound very sweet. I'm not home enough to properly care for a dog, but I wish I was! Dog therapy is my favorite kind of therapy.
Have a happy Valentine's day everyone. I confess I will probably eat a little chocolate. But I'm still going to the gym tonight, before my dinner date (by "date" I mean me cooking a lightened version of smoked salmon and pasta for BF)!
This is YOUR home and YOUR weight loss - no one else has the right to come in and mess up what you've worked so hard to accomplish. Tough love!
I can't really see much of anything on the ground, but I can hear the ping ping ping of ice hitting the windows. Gimme snow any time.
is calling. Take care all!
I hope your plan works. You need your sanity. And hiding in your room reading a book is a great idea!!! I've been known to do that, too! (Whatcha reading?) I bet it's a little sad to see the puppies go. I can't say that my xiphoid sticks up any, but I sure do love the fact that I can see my ribs!!!
