2 wheels is plenty :D
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Sacramento, CA
Posts: 3,099
S/C/G: 264/195/150
Height: 5'4"
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Little Gloria
A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks they're stupid, stand up!"
After a few seconds, Little Gloria stood up.
The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Little Gloria?"
"No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!"
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Little Gloria watched, fascinated, as her mother smoothed cold cream on her face. "Why do you do that, mommy?" she asked.
"To make myself beautiful," said her mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue.
"What's the matter?" asked Little Gloria. "Giving up?"
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A Sunday School teacher of preschoolers was concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus Christ because of the Christmas season emphasis on his birth. He wanted to make sure they understood that the birth of Jesus occurred a long time ago, that He grew up, etc. So he asked his class, "Where is Jesus today?"
Charles raised his hand and said, "He's in heaven."
Henry was called on and answered, "He's in my heart."
Little Gloria, waving her hand furiously, blurted out, "I know! I know! He's in our bathroom!"
The teacher was completely at a loss for a few very long seconds. Finally, he gathered his wits and asked Little Gloria how she knew this
Little Gloria said, "Well... every morning, my father gets up, bangs on the bathroom door, and yells, "Jesus Christ, are you still in there?!"
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The math teacher saw that little Gloria wasn't paying attention in class. She called on her and said, "Gloria! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?"
Little Gloria quickly replied, "NBC, CBS, HBO and the Cartoon Network!"
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Little Gloria's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the 10 most wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person.
"Yes," said the policeman. "The detectives want very badly to capture him."
Little Gloria asked, "Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture?"
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Little Gloria attended a horse auction with her father. She watched as her father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse's legs, rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Gloria asked, "Dad, why are you doing that?"
His father replied, "Because when I'm buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy."
Gloria, looking worried, said, "Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom."
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