Robin ~ I was struck by the line " I am getting better at accepting that it needs to be done"....kudos to you. Accepting melts the inner resistance....that's such a huge thing..a small step and giant leap. May I share a thought.....could there be any reason that might benefit you in a non-working pedometer? I think things happen for a reason when we are focusing on our goals...even small things, like not functioning pedometers.
Onebyone ~ I am celebrating with you....many babysteps and a 5lb loss! woo-hoo for you! I read a interesting review about Outliers in Newsweek...it said that it is aimed to humble the arrogant a bit....the wildly successful among us who think they are better than the rest of us because of their success.....his point is that talent, academic, musical or athletic, is only part of the equations....luck also plays a role.....it is intended to deflate the egos of the aggrogant....well, at least according to Newseek.
Bill ~ great planning and great follow-thru....woo-hoo for you....you are thinking like a thin person! Thanks for the example of your thought process...it is really helpful....the victory is in the details and small but important choices. No need to steal the mantra...it is freely given! ;o)
Anne ~ "My turtle sleeps sideway....crash".....no, I am not crazy, these are the words to the graduation march! LOL! You are graduating today...congratulations! As Bill rightly noted about the opera composer not being a working/nursing of two, I add this favorite quote from a friend, "the hand that rocks the cradle, rules the world!" One of the things that I admire about Oprah is how much she admires and respects motherhood....she even believes that it is the hardest/most important job in the world.....raising little human beings. I hope you enjoyed your night out with the girls.....it sounds as if you needed a wee bit of fun.
Shrinkin' ~ ouch about the long lost post....I use the quick reply post and will often write and post and then hit edit to add....it's what I am doing right now in fact because we cross-posted. It is so frustrating to lose a post.....for me, my heart is never quite into writing the second draft. I remember that you recently noted a 2 lb loss and said good-bye to the 90's.....I think to maintain this thru the holidays is truly an accomplishment....slow and steady wins the race! (I always liked the tortoise and the hare story since I was a kid!) Yes, the "your opinion of me is none of my business" is a very useful mantra and I believe so true....peoples opinion reflect their own projections/judgements. Once I went to an art museum and noticed that the beautiful woman in the 16th century paintings all had adominal rolls.....it was then I realized that I was not fat, just born in the wrong century! I could have been a sex symbol in the 16th century, pre-Twiggy! LOL!
My stuff.....
Red ghostbusters symbol last nite...oh well? I have a definite connect between finances and food....as I wrote DS totalled car 2 weeks ago ....not a great time to be car shopping, right before Christmas, and in this doom and gloom ecomomy. Just putting it out there, so maybe I'll really get my anxiety-nite eating connection as the thought of the stars and ghostbusters sign did not prevent me, nor did Segio, DR DRILS.....I'll get this....not giving up. Also I did get this month's O magazine....I would like to caution others as I felt it was a downer....especially her comments about Cher and Tina Turner and cows.....frankly, I was a bit disappointed in reading her musings.....fortunately for Oprah, my opinion of her is none of her business! I did get in my Plan C walk.
It is cold and sleeting and gray....I am still coughing and sniffling.....much of Christmas still needs to be done. This is life....full of ups and downs, chaos and triumph, uncertainty and joy, anxiety and peace...it's all part of the process...only 3 more days until the light begins its return. woo-hoo! Perhaps I need a bit of holiday wonder...some fa-la-la-la and Santa Claus...some little elves and red noses.....some peace on earth....some Tiny Tim....turning my Bah-Humbug into a Merry Christmas. Today is a new day.....I can begin again, again.
God speed,
Andrea aka thinkerbell
Last edited by thinkerbell; 12-19-2008 at 09:35 AM.
We are suppose to get a bunch of snow today. This is when I miss our 4 wheel drive explorer. Didnt have to stay home and worry about getting stuck. Well, we drive a little tricked out street pkg focus Getting stuck is its specialty! What we do to save a $ on gas! Now its under $20 to fill the tank. Oh well. We can walk in this weather, its actually very refreshing. However my husband has other views on that
Some silver lining news......hubby went and had his yearly checkup. All was good until he got his results back. Seems his sugar is a bit high, and the dr told him flat out, quit eating sugar crap! Funny things have started happening, he's eating just like me!!!!! Passing on the pasta with his meals, skipping his jolly ranchers, even contemplated the last 3 cookies in the cookie box. He ate them, but then told me not to make anymore. Im really proud of him, and thanked him bigtime yesterday for eating the same way as me. It makes everything so much easier. My daughter on the other hand is a whole different ball of wax.
Bill~ Kudos!! Big time!! For making it thru the labyrinth of food with your "beck" still intact!! We need a pat on the back smiley for here!
Quote:
I once pulled up my sweat pants because of puddles
you pull up your legs not your entire pants! You dont want to go around looking like those old guys with their pants up too high!! Hubby gets his pants yanked down quite often because of this
shrinkin~ enjoy the snowstorm!! Sometimes getting stuck at home is the best thing to recharge our batteries.
k.......Im going to post here and move to the nxt pg.
thinkerbell~
Quote:
could there be any reason that might benefit you in a non-working pedometer? I think things happen for a reason when we are focusing on our goals...even small things, like not functioning pedometers.
Hmmm....probably not, because I dont stress over the pedometer like I do the scale, or how many miles Ive done when I get into walking on the treadmill. But you never know....if there is a reason, I havent figured it out yet.
This time of year is stressful for ppl during the good times. So the fact that you plan to maintain and follow the beck teachings is a good thing. Having to look for a car right now isnt great either....but the silver lining??? They are getting pretty close to dirt cheap right now. Especially with some of the companies offering employee pricing and cash back. You just might do alright.
Today is 7 of my 21 days at a time committment. Im down a few more lbs, Im looking and feeling better. I havent decided, but I may choose to stay off the scale until my 21 days are done. I have scale issues I'll think on it. So as far as I know and have planned I have been sugar/flour free for 7 whole days Ive been posting my food in fitday, and keeping track of moods, food, and lack of exercise. Havent been reading my cards as much as I should. I'll smarten up on that one. Ive been flexing my resistance muscle....its getting stronger.
Im putting it out there into cyberspace........I will commit to a minimum of 15 min on the treadmill for the next 7 days!
Arghh, whole long update post-- gone! I'll try again.
Disappearing from here, was not a good idea! I should have known better. BUT, despite not being around, some of the initial BDS principles have luckily just become natural for me However, I still have only implemented the first week exercises and I still need to concentrate on those more.
I believe there were 2 main reasons why this happened.
#1 I was freaked out by the amount of progress I was making
#2 That good thing that was happening that I referred to the last time I posted was about a boy
I recently re-connected with an old college flame and we were busy communicating through lengthy emails, text messages, etc. I can not believe how LOOONG it's been since I've had that butterflies in the stomach feeling! (At least 15 years) That was so awesome! (Oh and good for weight loss too because there wasn't much room for food with all those butterflies in there ) I have been through some horrible times in the past few years (including finding out about multiple affairs my soon-to-be-ex was having), so this is definitely a nice change of pace and something I feel I deserve after having to put up with so much crap. However, it's a catch-22 because I don't want me feeling good about myself to come from other people, I need it to come from me. I see how very quickly my good feelings about myself can be taken away when they're originating from how someone else perceives me.
I know that I was already on the path to feeling better about myself (that's probably why I had the nerve to contact this guy in the first place) but it certainly hasn't hurt to have him tell me that I'm still a "hottie" after looking at pictures of me on Facebook.
I know that I have a bad tendency to get completely caught up in other people though and not taking care of myself. One of the best things about my separation is that I'm finally living on my own for the 1st time in my life (with kiddos) and it's been so fantastic to have time and space for introspection. I cannot lose this. I need to re-focus on myself which includes being present here and continuing with the BDS.
Wow, I just realized something that seems so obvious now, but I didn't realize it until I started writing this post (maybe that's why I lost the 1st one)! I was stating that the 2 reasons I think I was losing focus on BDS was because of being scared of my success and because I was too wrapped up in a guy. I never thought about the fear of talking to a guy and letting someone into my life. He only lives a few hours away from me and we've already discussed getting together (maybe after the holidays). Whoa, of course that's scary. And, what better way to avoid all of it then re-gain the weight I've lost so I don't feel comfortable seeing him and I put that visit off.
HELLO? Duh! Okay, yeah, that was good to see and good for me to acknowledge. As a matter of fact, I noticed just last night sabotaging thoughts really coming in loud and strong (I'm pretty sure they are still there most of the day, just more subtly and I haven't been doing a good job of listening for them). Lots of thoughts about how I'll never have a good body, I'll never feel comfortable naked around somebody. Look at all those rolls still, etc., etc.
I did however, manage to pull myself out of the kitchen and get myself upstairs to bed And now I'm here and posting
Thanks for listening and I want to apologize for not being here to support all of you for the past week or so. I am not going to go back and do personals, but will resume them from this point forward.
Oh and I'm happy to report that despite the mental setbacks, I'm still down 12 lbs from when I began this journey at the beginning of November.
I decided today that I will be happy no matter the circumstances. What circumstances you ask? Well I'm not in touch with my family. I retreated when I started school and I think there is some kind of unwritten rule I tripped over by doing that. One that says "If I go away I have therefore rejected you." Not sure, of course, and this is the problem, but I have decided that if they are happier without me around, so be it. Really. AND it follows that my happiness is not dictated by their actions and I can CHOOSE to be happy and so I will do that. There have been no Christmas invitations extended to me and my DH, no calls, no emails. I have tried to call my mother and get no answer, let phone messages for my brother and several emails with no reply. I have two older sisters, one who said "oh it's you." the last time I called and has not called me back from when i called her last to invite her out for her birthday (in response I never sent her a birthday card or anything) and another who answered the phone by asking me why I was calling and then not bothering to ask me how I a doing after I took a deep breath and asked her how she was. Busy she said and she had to go. Okay. I could be making a mountain out of a molehill but you know I'm not hard to find, I didn't tell them off or yell at them or be mean to them, true I didn't keep in touch but I guess I was supposed to do all that. My mother may not be well and I don't even think they would tell me how she was so the last week or so I've been trying to reach her and there is no answer, leading me to assume she's out of town. Eventually I will get some news. Until then I refuse to be miserable any longer. It does make me wonder what to do about Christmas in terms of gifts or cards or what. Not sure what to do. I had thought I'd get my mother a present and mail it to her and send cards to everyone else. honestly, I don't feel like it, but then this is definitely a bad thing on my side isn't it? Opinions?
Foodwise I continue to do well. Focusing on fibre and vitamins and water. It's all good.
bennyhannahmama
Quote:
I believe there were 2 main reasons why this happened.
#1 I was freaked out by the amount of progress I was making
#2 That good thing that was happening that I referred to the last time I posted was about a boy
Hello! A saying we have around here that goes "persist in victory" comes to mind with your post today. It's good you're back to ground yourself. congrats on having that butterfly feeling! Where would we be without that? And kudos for maintaining your loss! You have more Beck in you than you think! Yay!
RobinW Hi Robin. Kudos on continuing with your plan. I relate to the DH business. My DH needs to get to the Dr and he HATES it. He'll use any excuse to flake out and he knows it's just a matter of time before the Doc says to him something to make him change his ways. He just turned 40 and he is steadily gaining weight. I have been no model for his to follow nor have I been successful (yet) in changing my own ways and I can't be a do as I say not as I do person so, he gains weight, I gain weight. I am no longer going down that road though. it is painfully obvious my body cannot accept this kind of abuse any monger. it just can't. And I need to be well, heart and soul. And I will match your 15min on the treadmill with the same or more on my mini tramp for the next 7 days.
thinkerbell I await the return of the light more than anything else. I do believe my year turns around it. when all else fails in the middle of a January day I can remind myself the days are getting longer and we are marching toward Spring. Time will not be stopped. It's comforting.
Kudos for Winter Solstice!
shrinkin I do believe that choosing to maintain while chaos reigns is very very smart Beck thinking. And it's not a fall back plan either. when i have NO plan I gain weight. My fall back is a retreat to old habits, none of which will serve me well at this juncture of my life. So hang onto a maintenance plan and enjoy those 180's! You've had much success now you need to PERSIST IN VICTORY
Billblueeyes First kudos on executing your plan at the event last night. Very well done. Second, I am not surprised that Malcolm Gladwell drifted off topic when promoting his new Outliers book. IMHO there's not much CONTENT in his book so probably the crash story is better. I haven't read anything new yet that I didn't already know and I am beginning part 2 of the book, page 161 of 299. Perhaps he is the first commercial (as opposed to academic cause I cannot believe this stuff hasn't been covered before. If not, I really need to pursue that academic career.) writer to track down the statistics and the comparisons and actually prove some of the concepts that make up Big Successes but so far there's nothing here for me that's surprising. Luck, opportunity, hard work, being in the right place at the right time, some smarts but you only need enough; too much doesn't equal getting that much more; emotional intelligence, being able to deal with people ie. charm ... being good at something that comes into fashion therefore you are ready to go when the trend blows wide open (Bill Gates has many of these factors) family background/models/support... ho hum is my review so far. maybe part 2 will be more; maybe there isn't any more to it? In which case, I should move to New York, or Berlin, to be a Famous Artist. And then if I reach my late 80's and I am still doing it I may get fame then. Maybe. Did I ever tell you a woman once came up to me in the washroom at a craft show and said "You picked a career where you'll only really make it big after you're dead." I thought "You really think I'm going to make it big?!?"
Time for me to give back a little as I am benefitting from all of your posts and for that, I am grateful.
Onebyone-WooHoo for your 5 pounds gone!! OUCH for your family issues. I think it is good to learn to be content no matter what happens with others, but when those we care about let us down, it does hurt. Family can unintentionally be hurtful. Maybe they were hurt when you were unavailable to them even though you didn't mean to hurt them. I humbly suggest you do whatever will make you happy for Christmas...do what you feel good about now and or guessing what you will feel good about later. Will you feel better if you send your mother a gift...then send it. Will you wish later you had sent her something, then send it. Same for your siblings. Will it hurt if no one acknowledges your efforts...yes, but it will hurt less if you decide up front you are doing it for you, because you want to...not because they will respond. Sending you big as you deal with this.
bennyhannahmamma-OUCH for losing that post..me too. Seems to happen the most when I am typing fast. for the excitement of a new guy in your life, but more for all of the insight you are gaining about how you think about weight. Important to remember you are far more as a person than a scale number or a waist measurement. You are far more than what any one person can think about you or how they treat you. No single characteristic (not any physical characteristic nor even any personality tendency) ever fully describes a person. BUT, it is good to get healthier (both thinner and stronger) for youself. You will be able to enjoy life more. The right SO in your life will want to help you get there but will value you while you are doing it. Ewe, I just reread this...if it sounds like preaching, I am sorry....not intended to be a preacher, just a cheerleader. Hope something in it is of value to you.
RobinW-I am so excited that you and DH are pursuing health together! I have lost track of details of your 21 day plan, but it sounds like you are making great progress! Suspect Buffalo will be getting the snowdump like the midwest just had...but then you out state New Yorkers are snow pros.
Andrea-Kudos for your walk! I am still reflecting on your opinion of others mantra. Wish I had learned to not care about what others thought when I was much younger. Would have saved some pain. Yup, unexpected money outlays are stressful but not solved by eating. I think it was oneby one that said, "If food isn't the problem, it isn't the solution." I am remind self that somehow, even when the money is lean,it all works out. Saying that, methinks some deep breaths and some BIG OH WELLs in order for DS and car. Sending some positive vibes for energy to deal with it.
BillBlueEyes-Wow...you just keep showing us how to be Beck successful. All that Chinese food...and you just skipped it. A 1.0 plate! Awesome...especially for someone that loves "free food", which a big buffet really is even if one has contributed to it. WTG on following thru on your plan. Thinking of you and those tough lunges!
Anne-Sending some warm hopes that your children are getting back to health. You do have a rich life. Looking forward to your Chang's report. Great to go out with friends and BIG Kudos for planning diet ahead of time. Hope to hear a review of the new Beck book...particularly whether it adds much to the previous one.
Robin ~ it's wonderful that you have inspired your DH by modeling healthy behavior...woo-hoo! It does make things easier when your life partner is on the same page. I totally get the scale thing! Yes, I have number issues also.
Kim ~ ah, those lovely butterflies! You have much awareness....I think that's so key to the anxiety-food connection and writing out what we are feeling does bring clarity. It seems to me the process of what you are experiencing right now is the key to "persisting in victory"....I just love that line!
Onebyone ~ Christmas time can highlight family problems....you have much awareness and resolve....."I decided to be happy today no matter the circumstances". My opinion as far as the present goes is do what feels good to you...just like in Beck's anti-craving stategies, imagine the aftermath.....how do you feel after Chrsitmas if you decide to give her a present? if you decide to not give her a present?
Shrinkin ~ thanks for the good thoughts! I like the idea about "If food is not the problem, than eating is not the solution." ....ah, if it were that simple....old habits die hard....methinks it has to do with that lovely seritonin in carbs.....definitely some sort of anti-anxiety coping mechanism....does Beck address this at all further in her book? As I feel I need to come up with a new enjoyable behavior...one that brings instant anxiety-relief, like the seritonin in carbs.....I have no will-power.....but I do have a very strong will to feel good, to be healthy and live a healthy life-style. I am wondering if finding a meditation CD might have a calming effect. Beck does list distracting behaviors in the Anti-craving chapter.....but nothing screams "relief".....I feel like this is my new mission.....to find and practice a new behavior so that it will be in place when the anxiety hits.Again, thanks for your warm thoughts.
Diet Coaches - Took a vacation day to avoid sitting in my office wondering when to leave early to avoid the snow, exposing myself to the giant traffic jam when I leave at the same moment everyone else does to avoid the snow and traffic jam. Good choice. CREDIT moi for some reason.
Used the morning to take four boxes of books and two boxes of stuff to Good Will. CREDIT moi for working on my environment. I'm still getting rid of things that I should never have kept, so it's a bit easier then it's going to be when I get to items of value that simply take up too much space in my life. Note the demonstration of projecting in advance what I'm going to feel in the future. LOL - OK, that's an opportunity to re-read day 26 Recognize Thinking Mistakes. Oh Well.
Thanks for all the encouragement about my on-plan eating at the company party buffet - yep, especially since it was FREE. Been thinking about it, and am kinda amazed that, with a serious plan in hand, it wasn't that hard. I planned in advance to have a bottle of water first, partially to delay rushing to the food table to feed my "gotta get mine" thinking. Then did that. Wasn't particularly tempted by the mounds of food because I attacked the table with an exact plan - which I simply exercised. Sorry for wallowing around in this, but it's a big deal for me because I continue to struggle with buffets and this was an unusual success. I usually don't arrive so carefully armed with a plan. It seems that I'm rather slow at learning the obvious. Oh Well.
Robin (RobinW) - Kudos for "sugar/flour free for 7 whole days," and Kudos to your DH for a wise response to the results of his sugar test. Neat that you'll have a co-conspirator on your healthy eating path. Had to laugh at having a car with the specialty of getting stuck.
LOL at your comment about old guys with their pants pulled high because I'm so sensitive to that right now. I'm at goal weight, but am not, and apparently never will be, at goal shape. Was trying to adjust my gym shorts to minimize the little muffin top that has taken up permanent residence in place of the old big muffin top. Was horrified that the best position made me look like a ninety year old man. I chose the muffin top, LOL.
onebyone - LOL and nearly in tears - that's got to be the most positive attitude on the planet when the lady suggested that you'd only make it big after you were dead and you thought "You really think I'm going to make it big?!?"
IMHO, responding to family requires a bit of considering, as has been pointed out, what you'll wish you had done ten years from now. My suggestion is to send your mother a gift and to continue to try to make contact with her regardless of her responses. Regardless of the past circumstances, you don't get another one and the ties don't go away in response to rational thinking about them. For your siblings and their kids, my suggestion is the same even though the ties are less. Small gifts can open hardened hearts. Can you make something personal for each? Especially using your incisive humor and cleverness that underlies your artistic talents.
Good luck with handing this. I know it isn't easy, isn't always reciprocal, isn't always fair, and NEVER comes with the certainty that you're doing the right thing. Just gotta push forward in the dark.
Andrea (thinkerbell) - Ouch for the Red Ghostbusters star. But BIG Kudos for having your suite of exercise plans prepared and Kudos for doing your "Plan C walk." Your upbeat attitude inspires me when you can write "I can begin again, again." Shopping for a car isn't a fun thing for me in the best of times, so I can imagine it's a pain for you when it's forced and it's a busy season. The only silver lining is that the dealers are rather desperate to make a sale right now, so there should be someone willing to make an attractive deal. Are you shopping for new or used?
Anne (wndranne) - Waving.
shrinkin - Yep, good plan with "while life is chaotic, best goal is to maintain." You're doing great during a super difficult time - especially passing on the FREE desserts at the office. But did find myself LOL at your "pool shopping in Dallas" - just wondering what the airline is going to say when you try to check it as luggage to bring it home.
By the by, had to lookup nidus - what a beautiful word. I particularly like the definition,
Quote:
Latin for nest, but in this context a place or point in a host where a pathogen can develop and breed.
Kim (bennyhannahmama) - Great news about your old flame; will keep my fingers crossed. Kudos for having yourself together enough to make the contact and venture into a meeting. That's really moving forward in your life, whether it works out or not. That's just really a big move.
Welcome to the Persist in Victory crowd; success does seem to draw out the fangs of the old Sabotaging Thoughts. Neat that you're aware of what's going on and are actively fighting for your right to go forward and leave the old negative stuff behind. I'm cheering for you.
Readers -
"Common diet related sabotaging thoughts:
...
Everyone else is eating.
... " Beck, pg 193.
Bill ~ LOL! ideal weight, not ideal shape! Once again, I learn so much from your process...thanks so much for sharing the real-life thoughts of a maintainer. Yesterday, we did buy a car (used).....once we made the commitment and figured out the finances it was fun....even bought one of those big red car bows...the look on my DS face...priceless!
Actually just a quick shout. Still trying to keep up with all of my favorite Beckies, reading your posts, sharing your victories and shaking my head and feeling your pain at the struggles.
Wndranne, that bug has not been frozen out in Minnesnowda, either. It is called the Nova (?) virus.....nasty, nasty, and not the flu..so it just has to pass through. Hope to escape, but it does seem to go through whole households.
We are snowed in again. Second weekend in a row. I am beginning to get visions of the winter of 96/97. The ice went off one of the neighboring lakes the day before fishing opener that year. It was a long one. The upside--I actually like shoveling snow. I do. It is good exercise and there is a visible outcome. Instant gratification.
One of our BAG (Beck Accountability Group) ladies has had great and consistent success..she is down about 15 pounds since we all started keeping each other accountable. She does have the most to gain. Yes, she does. She is just beginning to date and has cut one out of the herd; it is progressing slowly but surely.
To bennyhannamama, I say you go girl. The best way to get over one man is to find a new one. Always has been true, always will be. And of course, it doesn't mean "dive in head first" as if he is a carton of Ben and Jerry's. Just taste, evaluate, decide if it exactly what you want, or if you'd rather have cheesecake...or beefcake, as it were! I thought dating the second time around was a blast.
BillBE, I am willing to bet most anything that you are the only one who even notices a tiny muffin top. At our age, weight/fitness is the most important, almost the ONLY factor as to whether or not someone is attactive. We overlook wrinkles, liver spots (oh, *they* are attractive) follicle challenges of all sorts...there is that facial hair thang for girls our age..
Could so relate to your struggles with exercise form and then trying to breath right. I never got beyond beginning Pilates. Why anyone would need some machine when I can't even get the breathing right for The 100. Sheesh.
And, in defense of Minnesoda and our voting idiosyncrosies, on Wed. I heard a pundit saying by Friday of this week we would know which candidate would sue, because surely whoever was behind at that point would sue. Well, even that didn't happen. The counting continues.
That said, I have some pretty strong feelings about defending our state's voting process. For one thing, we again, as we usually do, led the nation in voter turnout. Yep, 77.3% of us did our civic duty and excerised our right to vote. Additionally, our system is paper/pencil and optic scanning, which is accurate, quick, and there is a paper trail. Now, keeping track of the paper is not without challenges, but still. ...
In fairness, I have to admit we do have that one thang to live down......that wrestler guy...we are a bit, uhmm.....odd.
We are the bluest of the blue states, but that is just the cold...
Tinkerbell, thank you for verbalizing exactly the joy and wonderment I felt about nursing; it was the best, the best bonding, the most natural thing. I loved every minute of it. Course there *was* that extra 500 calories a day that I could get away with, too! I think I should have nursed a few years longer...like maybe to 16 yrs. when he could drive and get out and about on his own..
Time to shovel, sweep and bring in wood..lotza wood....not gonna be above zero for a few days...yep, I think it is gonna be a lonnnnnnnggggggg one.
Happy Winter Soltice...tomorrow at 6:04 a.m. And then the days start getting longer. YAY!!
Ive decided 2 hrs of shoveling snow trumps 15 min on the treadmill Thatsa lotta snow out there! More to come tomorrow.
Last night was our chirstmas dinner with my 1st stepsons family. They ordered pizza, wings and made salad. I did good too!! I had 2 wings, ate the salad, which was a spinach and cherry tomato salad...so as far as salads go it wasnt too shabby. I then picked off some mushrooms off hubby's pizza, and the pepperoni from granddaughters pizza ended up in my plate too. I did great!
Bill~ fix the muffin top by wearing your shirt outside your shorts. Presto, gone! I believe it was Joan Rivers who said.....always worry about your face first, because nobody sees her body, she makes love with the lights out, and when she lays down everything falls back and flat!! There....another issue fixed My husband knows the high pants bug me, but he loves getting pulling up his shorts in the summer, and wearing socks with his sandles when the kids are outside. Its a unison holler from about 4 ppl to pull his pants down and take his socks off. Its pretty funny!
Kudos for dealing with the buffett!! I dont know if I would be as successful.
onebyone~ I like Bill's advice. Im not sure how old your mother is, but I find when parents and grandparents get older (mine anyway) they wont call, or return calls. Gramma always loves to hear from me, but she hasnt called in years and years! That might be one of the things going on with your mom. Here is my 2cents....pick a day and time and call every week. Just leave a message if she isnt home. Then just leave it at that. I would include mom and your neices and nephews in on the gift giving. Send cards to siblings. Then just leave it at that. Enjoy the holiday with your hubby.
shrinkin~ yup we got dumped on
thinkerbell~ it is nice being on this together. I worry about him...he's has quadruple bypass about 10yrs ago, and he is going great without any issues. But keeping the fat and sugar away from him is a big problem. ........I had to go and fall for an old guy! I want to keep him around for another 20-30 yrs or more!
I can hear the snowplow out there....I suspect its going to coming down the street soon ....and no our street hasnt been plowed yet. That should be another hour out there digging that mess out.
Here's my assessment of yesterday (and today so far):
1. Reading ARC: Umm... haven't read them once, although they do float around my head. Definitely need to improve this.
2. Eating while sitting down: I've done pretty well with this, although I know I've had some slips that I probably wasn't even aware of.
3. Eating slowly and consciously: This is one I've really let slip quite a bit. I think about it for the first few bites of a meal and then I quickly forget. This is something I had been doing really well with and I think was helping me tremendously. Need to get back to work on this. ** Oh boy, as a matter of fact I'm eating while I'm typing this and didn't even realize that until further along in my post!
4. Giving myself credit: I think I do at times, but I know definitely not enough. I need to really make this one a habit.
5. Checking in with diet coach: I posted yesterday and today!
In looking at my assessment of how I've been doing, I'm kind of tempted to start at Day 1 again before moving forward. However, I'm not sure if that will just enable my perfectionist thinking and keep me from making progress. (I think a big part of why I haven't moved past the first week is exactly that-- my perfectionist thinking.)
I'd like to give myself credit for a few things though:
- I have continued to follow my program (which is tracking everything that I eat in the Senswear software). I have done this even when I ate a bunch of Christmas cookies a neighbor dropped off, when I've nibbled on candy the kids have gotten and when I didn't mentally prepare myself for a potluck breakfast at work and ate too much! In the past, I've had a tendency to only keep track when I'm doing well. This is a HUGE change for me.
On the same note though, I have not been doing a great job with keeping up with my logging and find myself trying to remember what I've eaten much earlier in the day or even sometimes the day before. This makes things more challenging for me and then I get frustrated and tend to want to say, "The **** with it." But, I have NOT done that. So, I will continue to work at being more diligent in my logging.
- I have continued to exercise and even ran a 5K Holiday Hustle in the snow last Saturday! I also beat my last race time by almost 2 minutes! I have thoroughly enjoyed my exercise and the high I get afterward. It is really helping me with feeling like a "thin" fit person. I do need to work on doing exercise other than cardio though.
Onebyone I wish I had some good advice for you about your family situation. I will give you this: and tell you a couple of thoughts that have popped into my head reading your post. First of all, my sister stopped talking to my mother almost 2 years ago and saw and spoke to her for the first time at my brother's funeral My sister actually seems to be okay with that, but I know personally, that would have made a devastating situation, even more devastating to me.
On the flip side of that, I have been going to CoDA (Codependents Anonymous) meetings since the summer and I'm really starting to learn the importance of taking care of myself and not doing things because of how it will make other people feel. We need to live our own lives and not do/say things for others. So, none of it is advice, but just some things to think about, I guess.
Thanks for your kind supportive words, they were really helpful!
Shrinkin Wow, not only did I not think of what you wrote as preaching, I think I want to print it out and frame it! As I was reading what you wrote (and each time I've re-read it), I had tears in my eyes. Thank you so much for your important, encouraging words, they mean so much to me!
Thinkerbell Reading what you wrote about needing to find something to replace using food for relief really hit home for me. I know exactly what you're talking about (as I'm sure almost everyone else does) and there are times that I feel like I'm going to jump out of my skin if I can't just eat something. For me, unfortunately, that relief sometimes comes in the form of attention/flirting with guys. I had forgotten that because of all the years I had been married and that was not an option. Now that I'm exploring that whole world again, it's coming back to me. That is no better than food Especially because when I don't get the attention I crave (someone hasn't called when they said the would, etc.), I just want to eat more!
I think one of the things that's hardest about trying to replace food with some other form of relief is that food is so easy. It's readily available (at home, at work, while out and about-- EVERYWHERE!) and eating can pretty much take place anytime and anywhere. I can eat whether my kids are here needing my attention or not, I can eat while doing a report at work, I can eat when it's freezing cold outside or burning hot, I can eat while typing on the computer, I can eat while talking on the phone. Seriously, I can't think of any other stress relief that is so versatile
However, on a positive note, for the first time in my life I find myself looking forward to and craving my workouts. When I'm stressed, I think about when I can get my next workout in! This is so exciting and I do believe achievable by most people.
I like your idea of a mediation CD too. What you gain from that you can use at anytime, anywhere. Deep breathing, etc. Somewhere I have a "hypnosis" type CD that's supposed to help with food issues. (Haven't listened to it in a long time.) One of the benefits is supposed to be that after you listen to this guys voice enough, just hearing it for a moment or two should kind of kick your craving. I unfortunately never used it regularly enough to tell you if it works- LOL!
Bill I don't think you should be apologizing at all for "wallowing". I hardly think of it as that. This is a HUGE victory for you and I think you should be celebrating that. By apologizing for "wallowing" you're diminishing your success-- give yourself credit and enjoy it!
I know exactly what you mean about having a plan though. I've had 3 buffets in the past few weeks and the first 2 I was completely prepared for and did well. The 3rd I barely thought about (I figured since I had done so well with the other two, there really was no need-ha!) and didn't do nearly as well
LOL about the choice of muffin top vs. 90 yo man (I'm still giggling as I write this!)-- I say you made a wise choice!
Just got to your response to me and that you're "cheering for me", thank you, that means so much.
Anne I'm so sorry you are having to deal with all this illness. I hope that this means you will done with any kind of sickness for the rest of the winter (at least)! Hang in there, it will pass.
Maryblu OMG, thank you for the huge laughs and great mental pictures! Wow, I had no idea MN had such a huge voter turnout, that is something to be really proud of, how cool. Now if only you all could be rewarded with a decision already!
I missed Andrea's post about nursing, but I love being in the company of other women who realize what a truly wonderful, incredible experience it is. I nursed DD until she was 2.5 (she stopped due to low supply b/c I was pregnant with DS) and DS until he was 3.5. One of the things that's exciting about dating to me is the prospect of having more children
I spent about 2 hours clearing my driveway yesterday (I only have a little electric snow blower and we had about 6/7" of snow) and really enjoyed the workout (I did some shoveling too.) It was fun to see my calorie expenditure on my Senswear report-- definitely great exercise!
Robin
See above and yes, I totally agree 2 hours of shoveling trumps 15 minutes on the treadmill
Wow, I can't tell you guys how terrific I feel after coming on here, reading everyone's posts, etc. What a fantastic group this is!
Edited to fix some typos.
Last edited by bennyhannahmama; 12-20-2008 at 06:01 PM.
I got out there, found a gift fomr my mother and mailed it off with a xmas card. Done. Got a bonus card off for DH's mom. Good. I've decided that when I do talk to my sblings I'll tell them I have their gift wiht me and will give it to them when I see them. I have tried to reach my mother for a few days now and no luck. I'll keep trying and try weekly from here on in. She's 82 and qualifies for that kind of effort on my part I think.
Foodwise I'm still doing okay--have been eating cheetos though. odd. But is okay. Staying away from choclate bars and such but drinking hot chocolate. Hmmm. Stll. I am fundamentally okay.
Better go, my laptop's gonna die!
Thanks for all the thoughts and wisdom. Much appreciated.
Diet Coaches - Good exercise this snow is. I did my two hours of shoveling. CREDIT moi. It was good shoveling snow - not too light, not too wet. And certainly was good exercise.
My DW has discovered this neato idea. She loves hot chocolate under situations like yesterday, but doesn't like the huge calorie hit. So, she discovered that 4 ounces of hot chocolate makes her very happy, at half the calories of 8. Which is pretty good since the premium mix she uses lists 500 calories for the amount it recommends for 8 ounces. So very unintuitive to me that moderation is such a good idea.
maryblu - Ouch for that Nova virus. Is that the cruise ship virus? when I googled it, I discovered these neat lyrics:
Quote:
Heather Nova - Virus Of The Mind Lyrics
Well I was watching this talk show the other day
And on it there was this guy and he was saying
When you let other people tell you what's right
When you leave your instinct and your own truth behind he said
That's a virus of the mind. That's a virus of the mind
I guess it's kind of like losing your sight; for a
Second you think that they might be right, and it
Feeds the doubts you have inside, and it
Almost starts to feel like a crime
To follow your own rhythm and rhyme
Yeah I'm pretty happy living in my own sweet time I'm pretty happy
And I don't need your virus of the mind
That 77.3% voter turnout is impressive; congratulation to "Minnesoda" for good citizenship. Wish you could distribute that to the rest of the states. Just WOW that the last I read your senate race was separated by two votes. Perhaps that story, however it unfolds, can be used to motivate those who think of wimpy excuses not to vote.
Thanks for the perspective about physical appearance of people "our age." It's still a challenge for me to accept that, regardless of how healthy my lifestyle, I don't get the body of a 20 year old. Oh Well.
Robin (RobinW) - Kudos for your performance at DSS's Christmas dinner. Love the passive voice in, "the pepperoni from granddaughters pizza ended up in my plate too."
Laughing at the image of your DH presenting himself to the family with hiked shorts and socks in his sandals. Interesting that at my gym, the only guy with a tucked in shirt is an Asian gentleman who also wears socks with his sandals - and he looks pretty neat. But don't think any of the rest of us could pull it off.
onebyone - BIG Kudos for making a decision about your mother and your relatives. And I think you made a really good decision - one that you'll feel comfortable with regardless of their response. Yay for doing OK with food.
Anne (wndranne) - Ouch that DS and DD are acting, well, age appropriate. Yep, this too shall pass. Kudos for hanging in there.
Andrea (thinkerbell) - That's just beautifully stated, "I feel like this is my new mission.....to find and practice a new behavior so that it will be in place when the anxiety hits." It seems so realistic to accept that we're using food to face anxiety, and that anxiety will arrive again and again.
Congrats on your prompt car purchase. I like that big red bow that blew away the mind of your DS. Your post yesterday caught me by surprise, since I was sleeping in to avoid the shoveling task and you posted while I was dawdling over my responses, LOL.
Kim (bennyhannahmama) - Yep, good idea to move forward with the Beck program. It was a big step for me to accept that completing a program day didn't mean mastering it; it meant that I had read the material, done the checklist, and added that strategy to my arsenal.
Kudos for giving yourself credit. It is indeed a HUGE step to also track food when it's not on-plan.
Thanks for your story of the three buffets. That's good reinforcement for me to persist in victory after a success by remembering to repeat the planning effort, rather than minimizing the planning to try the experiment, one more time, of how I perform in front of mounds of food.
Readers -
"Common diet related sabotaging thoughts:
...
I don't want to disappoint or inconvenience [fill in the blank].
... " Beck, pg 193.
Woo-hoo! It's officially winter is North America....the shortest day of the year! We get thru this dark day and it will only get brighter and more sunny...the light shall return.
Maryblu ~ nice to meet you! I am impressed that you hang out with real-life BAG ladies! LOL! How did you find them? I love this forum and thread, but flesh and bones is nice too. I'm green with envy.
Robin ~ yes, snow shoveling trumps the treadmill! And woo-hoo for you for thriving at your holiday party....pizza can be such a trigger for some...great job! Seriously, you strengthened your resistence muscle.....between the shoveling and resisting you had an awesome work-out yesterday.
Kim ~ Your post is brimming with victories...especially impressive to me is your willingness to track your food when it is even off-plan....oh, and looking forward to your work-out....wow....that is thinking like a thin person! Thanks for sharing your thoughts about the anxiety food connection.....how food is everywhere and so available. The flirting can also be an instant hit but it can also have an opposite effect....the whole attention thing can be a trigger for needing a layer of protection.....finances and sexuality are slippery slopes, at least for me. Thanks for the validation of the whole "anxiety/relief" issue...You have given me much to ponder.
Onebyone ~ sounds to me your making positive life-affirming choices and living by your values...regardless of the others response. Many years ago I went to a weight-loss psychologist and one of the things that I learned that has stayed with me is that I need to do/ask/say what I must....the other person's reaction does not make it right or wrong.....I need to live out of my personal truth and core values, listen to my own gut, learn to honor my own opinion of my own life. ...it was an important lesson and like you, had much to do with family....parents and siblings....and yes, Christmas time does put the spotlight on these sometimes challenging relationships. Sending you warm thoughts of peace and confidence and happiness.....as you have decided. Hugs! (((((onebyone)))))) Keep going!
Bill ~ wow about the hot chocolate....500 cals! I am shocked. Give me a 0cal coffee or tea any cold snowy day. But I do admire her awareness and compromise....life is all about choices. Shoveling IS an awesome work-out and pretty too. I do appreciate your warm reflections as I struggle to figure to this thing out.....I am feeling the encouragement.
best wishes,
Andrea aka Thinkerbell
Last edited by thinkerbell; 12-21-2008 at 06:42 AM.
Getting stuck is its specialty! What we do to save a $ on gas! Now its under $20 to fill the tank. Oh well. We can walk in this weather, its actually very refreshing. However my husband has other views on that 
I'll think on it. So as far as I know and have planned I have been sugar/flour free for 7 whole days 
Ive been posting my food in fitday, and keeping track of moods, food, and lack of exercise. Havent been reading my cards as much as I should. I'll smarten up on that one. Ive been flexing my resistance muscle....its getting stronger. 
Friday Afternoon
Kudos for Winter Solstice! 
for the excitement of a new guy in your life, but more 
Hope something in it is of value to you. 
Saturday - The BIG snow has landed
yup we got dumped on 