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September 2007 The Beck Diet Solution
Happy September, threadmates!
Maryblu, I'm probably up the scale a bit myself because I can't always string together a decent run of "good days" right now either. But always remember, it's the overall tally that really counts. If at the end of a month you've had 20 good days and 10 not-so-good days, that is still progress. And after several months like that, you will have lost instead of gained. And that's what it's all about, right? And I enjoy fall too--it's not so hot that you're miserable but not cold enough to want to hibernate either. We can get in a lot of outdoor activity in the fall. Let's go for it! Good Morning, Girly! I hope today is a good day for you. I am dedicating the month of September to being back on plan. I really want to be somewhere in the 150s by the time December rolls around and I'm going to keep that foremost in my mind. Let's make fall our Season of Success. Even if we have some setbacks, let's make our overall motion forward! Sue, keep riding that wave of good choices and exercise. Hang a hand down here to us and give us a boost back up! I'm determined to join you there! For some reason, a marker of some sort (a Monday, a new month) always give me new inspiration. I need it now and I'm going to milk it for all it's worth. Today my goal is to cut the junk food. I have a party tonight but I will eat wisely all day. I need to get my water in too. Those thirst driven "false hunger signals" are getting kicked to the curb today. Happy September, all! L |
Oh, I love when it's a new thread, too. A fresh month. Actually, we have a fresh day every day if we think about it, but the month feels even better. Your post was great, Liannie. Uplifting.
Hello to vegetable girl, Sue. I wanted to reply to Maryblu's comment that Judith Beck had such a small amount of weight, etc. because I had the same reaction (my reaction: what does she know...15 pounds...sheesh...she's such a tiny thing, how can she know, etc. Even though I'm loving her books, I thought this) *********** In one part of this four-day win book, she is talking about famine brain from dieting/deprivation. "Famine conditions cause the brain-body connection to haul out some very big neurochemical guns. The hungrier we get, the more a hormone called dopamine floods an area of our brains called X. This causes goal-seeking activity, including the search for food. If we eat immediately, the XX gets swamped with serotonin, we feel satisfied, and we stop thinking about eating. If no food shows up, dopamine levels keep rising, driving increasingly urgent food-seeking. I spent years avoiding fattening food to keep myself from overeating, and I developed a case of famine brain that nearly made me suicidal. When I was a college freshman, always on a diet, I'd eat the meager dinner allowed by the regimen I was on. Then, while I wasn't hungry, I'd engineer my environment so I couldn't get more food until the next day. I'd stay away from the student union at the hours when food was available. I'd make sure I had no money, not one red cent, that I could spend on food. Then I'd settle in and try to focus on studying. As the year went by, I started to experience the full nightmare of a famine-modified brain. I'd lie in bed, exhausted but too hungry to sleep, until 2 or 3 in the morning. Then I'd get up and ransack my dorm room, looking for spare change. When I didn't find it (of course I didn't find it; I'd made sure of that myself), I'd head out into the zero-degree weather and run for hours, desperately checking to see if there were any 24 hour convenience stores giving out food samples or throwing away food that was still packaged. Or not packaged. I'd run almost all night. Usually, I found nothing edible. But when I did, no matter what it was, I ate it. I couldn't not eat it. I might as well have tried to stop breathing. This ghastly ritual took on a life of its own. I began bingeing during the day, regaining some of the weight I'd lost........ More than 20 years later, I think my brain is almost back to normal........." Interesting, huh. I think she understands. I think she qualifies to be in our club :) |
Oh, she does indeed understand. She has heard it,seen it all....that is so obvious. It is just that she was a "civilain" ie acceptable wt. to start with...that said.....these 20#s that I have gained make me feel as fat as I did at 220#..nothing fits right; I have rolls....the trouble is, when you gain wt. back, it is all fat..just ugly fat...
Honestly, when I first read Beck, it all made perfect sense......she lays it out so well.....I just got to feeling like a "civilian", and I got away with eating intuitively for quite some time...but then when I saw my wt. going up, I started that "diet mentality" and that is where things got sideways....if I could just get that gift back...that gift of sanity I had about food...just had a little bit of whatever I wanted and was satisfied with it. Hungry again in about 3 hours, but not starving......ate a little bit and was really quite happy to never be full. *sigh |
howdy,
happy September to you all. This the time when things get calmer in our area-Tourism is big industry in our area and now there will be far fewer of them. It will be nice to be quieter. I have had a mini pig out. I though I had conquered some addictions better than I actually had. I brought home a 1/2 gal of low cal ice cream-I was sure I could eat 1/2 cup over the next week. It seemed such a good idea on unusually hot day up here. Wrong-Once home all the old sirens called to me ate it all in 24 hrs. It was real work for me to leave any late Friday night. All day Sat I continually thought of it and just had to finish it. And it was not that favorful!!! But cold and sweet. Naturally once I "blew it" I added a sweet roll, fried food and another ice cream cone to the day total. I am not wired to think like a thin person! Deep down there is a force that says-"There NEVER is enough of certain foods." G-College days and food cravings sounded horrible- That insane pull between one part of mind saying "You Must" (if you have any moral fiber and self control)and the other part saying "You Can't" (if you want to have any peace of mind and concentrate on something else than food) I had similiar struggles in highly stressed times in my live. For the last 2 decades I choose to Completely ignore the "ought to be healthy" part of the brain-went to increasing serotonin at "Any cost" to my body. Whew. now am over 300lb and find each step painful. When we first moved to this isolated area I actually felt some panic there was nothing open after 8'oclock anywhere to buy food. While loving some breaks from the measuring and recording of food and taste treats of some of high cal foods, my desire to move again without pain is so powerful. As I ate my yummy treats I could evaulate how good it was, but knew I was trading in time of being able to lose weight and walk easier. The slower I lose, the longer it will take walk in less pain. I can be much more logical when buying individual treats in the community. I lose all rationale when the food is in the house. The most important role for me now is only non-addicting food in the house! Somehow the steps of parking, going into the shop, paying and then get the treat, I can stop process,(lucky there is no drive thurs for about 55 miles) but treats in the home are a hugh magnet for me-both physically and mentally. M- I so understand that any gains feel so ugly. I feel better at 350 going down than gaining a lb at 325. I am so dam* mad at myself. L-like you I focus on the number of days being on target, When I am not- try to learn why I "needed" to overeat and learn to accept those times. I also feel there is only one expert about me losing weight and it is me.-I have had so much crappy advice-ideas that work for one person and will never work for me. Just spent the day with some family members who feel thier thinness has given them a moral edge of the rest of the fat world. Felt like I was wearing heavy invisible jacket made of their judgemental criticism of my body. To bad I give them that power. But they are just thinking what I working on not to feel. I have a tough time being around critical people. back to eating well for all sue |
HI, all...
It is a beautiful day today......gonna head to the other side of the lake soon for an annual bbq and am looking forward to it. My friends over there are some of the best cooks I know. I am going to eat what I want, just less. I have only had a fiber one bar so far and have been outside gardening....actually, doing some of my famous fiddling around....just going from garden to garden deciding what needs to be moved where. My dear SO (what a digger!) just finished a whole new garden spot for me....kidney shaped..though he says it is Lake Superior...nice size about 20 ft. by 10 to 15 in spots.....some of it is full sun and it goes to quite shady, so will be quite a nice spot. Sue, you have posted about those judgemental thin family/friends before..guess it is quite likely their own insecurities lead to needing to feel superior......just like in grade school..just like with the race hatred..gays, etc. I have often wondered if somehow all the people who are "hated" (I don't mean that quite as harsh as it sounds) for whatever reason.....if all the gay people, all the fat people, all the minorities were shipped away, then who would be left to "hate" ...to feel superior to, to judge.......then what? Would the world be perfect? I don't mean to imply your family hates you; I just took this a step further to the intolerance thing... Enjoy today, all..... |
hi
M-thanks for the support-Working on getting more and more distance from their behaviors and words-I agree it is insecurities but I have lived with some of them for a time when younger and actually then believed they were correct. So the hook is quite old and really do need to removed by me. I miss MN after reading your posting about the lake, sue |
Hi everyone,
Sue, those comments about college were actually a quote from Dr. Beck's book...they were her college experience. It sounded like pure ****. Looking back on my college days, I was pretty darned healthy in my attitude about food, and oh so thin. Those were the days! I didn't think, "Oh, now I'm going to walk to school. That will burn off calories. Oh, good." No, I just enjoyed the walk. Then eat. Then do other stuff I liked. I can remember an occasional obsessive thought about wanting to eat, but once I went off to university, I was so happy and I don't remember obsessing, though I've always liked food, that's for sure. Sue, I feel a change is imminent with you and your relatives. I can feel it brewing. I think they really have NO idea, NO idea of the struggle that it is. As a formerly thin person with a ridiculously good metabolism, I remember having some feelings of judgment, too. I'm ashamed of that, but I just had NO! idea. I'm bordering on wanting to say SCREW THEM (your relatives) and at the same time, understand that they are clueless, not having experienced it. I'm realizing that I've used food to soothe myself, to insulate myself, because it has seemed hard to get thru some of the hard parts of life w/o the insulation of something. Maybe, besides altered brain chemistry that overeaters have, maybe we are just a more sensitive lot. That's what *I* think. Anyway, I've always been ultra-sensitive. Sometimes I ask God, OK, what is the BENEFIT of being sensitive? Mostly it's just painful. But part of it is learning to deal with my emotions and sensitivities in a healthy way, not eating. OK, I'm rambling here. I've gained even more weight. I am taking these herbs (long story) for another week, and I don't know if they're messing with the efficacy of my thyroid meds or what, but I'm gaining even faster than usual. I've been debating about going back onto Weight Watchers. I'm so fickle. I'm tired of trying to figure out my calories on FitDay and it's WAY easier to account for "points." IT takes like 5 seconds to figure out. The last time I didn't lose anything despite sticking to it without cheating for a month, but I think my body was more messed up then. And I got pissed when one of the leaders poked fun at people using their thyroid as an excuse to not lose weight. Maryblu, you look great in that photo....you look thin! Hi to Liannie. Hope things are settling down for you. girly |
Hey Ladies, can I get in on your discussion here? I just started Beck's 6 week program from the Diet Solution. I'm on day 10 and I like it so far. Any hints for a newbie?
A little about myself: I'm 25, I live in Iowa and my SO and I have a 14 month old daughter. I'll find out in 10 days or so if I passed the bar exam and can actually be a practicing attorney. I work for a non-profit that provides legal assistance to low-income people. |
God bless us, everyone!
Veronica! Welcome. I get to welcome you; that means I am not the newest "newbie" anymore! LOL.
Girly, I have to confess..I was "thin" in that pic.....15 #s thinner...haven't worn that dress in 2 years! That pic is from 3 yrs. ago. I posted that pic for a very weird reason, but we all share our "weirdness" here..........that tree that I am posing by....that plum tree.....it frames a very special part of two of my gardens.....it is what I see every morning first thing outside my kitchen window.......it is the last thing I see framing my gardens...two of them... at night....the border by the lake and my BIG garden...the one with all the Phlox......it is so cool with its weird shape....I plan my tulip planting around it every spring.....I get the latest flowering bulbs I can so they bloom when the plum tree does.....it has to go......it is being cut down and "stumped" on Thursday...I am crying as I write this....this has been the focal point of two of my gardens for the 12 years I have lived here...it is old and not doing well.....it has to come out so we can get a boom truck in and get out a dead Elm on the lakeside that could take out my steps down to the lake.........AND........I found out last year I am deathly allergic to Yellow Jackets, and the fallen plums are a MAGNET for those little suckers.....I still don't know if I will be able to part with it.....I have given it a reprieve once......it is so cool......I may not be able to part with it...we shall see... Anyway, I still am thinking alot about those who have to be superior because they are thin, and seem to have to have that "attitude". I know someone who was very heavy...got control of her life on her own....good for her, but now when she heard of someone having a bypass was VERY judgmental...saying couldn't you have a little control? Well, obviously NOOO, or she would not resort to major, life-threatening surgery......a last resort..and now I am thinking about what I am judgemental about.......and...I certainly have my chosen bugaboos.......lets see........what I am judgmental about? I really have my issues, that is for sure.......and this one is just PETTY, but I really do judge ladies...especially young ladies who wear tight clothes. It seems that everyone does it these days......whether you have bulges or not......just the skin tight-over-the-rolls.....it doesn't seem like a good idea! LOL M |
Hi Veronica,
Welcome! I wish I had some words of advice, darn it! I'm still learning from the people here, though. I have only "welcome" like the little drummer boy. Have you chosen a food plan? Would you like to share some of your reasons list for losing? MaryBlu, wow! I really got your post about the tree. They really do have an alive energy. Sometimes I can barely trim my plants...I'm like, I'm sorry, I'm just trimming you, you're beautiful. With trees it's even more palpable. Regarding the tight clothes, I haven't had that feeling so much. I'm 42; I work with 18-25 year olds (my students), so I see a lot of the fashion stuff. What I was completely horrified about was the trend with the butt crack! Girls sitting with their low pants and their butt cracks showing all over campus, like it's absolutely no big deal. And I do know what you mean about the tight clothes in regards to the low pants--have you ever heard of the term "muffin top?" It's when they wear really tight low pants, and all the fat gushes over the top, like a muffin top? Even "skinny" girls can have that. I want to shout out, "That doesn't look good!" I really feel a generation gap with the tattoos, too. I can feel OK with a little one, but it's becoming more and more mainstream here to get LARGE tattoos, or like a whole arm tattooed; I feel like they are just ruining themselves with those. Yuck. I joined Weight Watchers Online last night; trying a 5 day free trial. I guess I'm not really changing my plan; it's just calorie counting in an even easier way. ANd the online plan is awesome; I wasn't one of the ones who enjoyed those meetings. Played tennis tonight; have stayed on plan for the first day in many. Liannie, how's your recommitment going? Shout out to Sue. girly~ |
Hello everyone,
welcome Veronica-good luck on passing the bar-my son also is a lawyer focusing on envronmental law-not destory it but saving it. I found Beck a good foundation for me. I really liked having the reasons for weight loss in the kitchen. Even now I remember them when I have periodic overindulgences. I must admit I sort of plateaued studying the book. Keep us posted with your responses to the book and it will help us all re-focus on it. I still sort of preplan and do record everything on Fitday-For me that daily recording is critical for eating less. M-oh that beautiful tree which is so important in your daily view. It is going to be a tough looking at "where it used to be". Your passion for gardening really comes thur. thanks heaven there are you talented folks out there to beautify the world so-regretfully my talents are else where. I have more small plastic seedling holders than successful healthy plants. I agree with G loved the pic of both you and tree-may you soon be in that dress size again. The everychanging dress code of teens-Always being a large girl-5'8'' at 12 yrs, I feel for the girls who pour themselves into outfits that belong on the those who should be 20 lbs underweight, That desire to belong is so powerful inspite of looking rather foolish and often behaving foolish. My own kids wore some of the uglest, tasteless rock t-shirts-everywhere! But now I think that looked better than the pant waist at the knees. g-keep me posting on the on line WW. I have been temped but want to know it is worth the money. Got to be so frugal due to that dam* increase in medical insurance. I have been pondering hurt feelings and why I hold on to them. Today I had this Ah Ha moment. I was raised by a talented but very unhappy, angry mom who being the only daughter I was "assigned" the role of care taker. The unspoken duty was to make her happier- So when she was unhappy, critical, judgemental I felt that I was guilty of "something" . Instead of dismissing her attitudes, I worked harder to please her. The challenge was getting her to like me. She actually told me when I was an adult she has never liked me. Heck, I could never make her like herself. The relatives I just saw carry the many of same attitudes and I reverted to old unhealthy ways. Trying to please the unpleaseable and getting hurt and mad when they remain unhappy. so G- you are right there is some changes brewing, most importantly there are with me and I will NOT internalize nor get invloved in their unhappiness. Yep I'll be the "rude" one for not visiting more often. I am sensitive or even oversensitive and I have self medicated with food when I have felt hurt or unsucessful. Some times I just absorb that negative energy being around such folks. I have been far too influenced by grumpy judgemental folks versus seeing them as unhappy, unsatisified people boosting their ego at the cost of others' self esteem. Obesity is still an easy target- can be Politically Correct and still laught at the fat or "pity" them. I want to get to the point that when I hear criticism I know that is their problem and let the crappy energy go quickly thur me. That will be a hugh help in me losing and maintaining a Large weight loss. Thanks for letting me write about me "weirdness". L what is up-hope you are not super busy. Best thoughts to all sue |
Hey Everybody!
Just a quick holler. I'm still out here. Welcome Veronica! Glad to have you with us. I'll edit and write more later.... L |
Thanks for the welcome everyone! Maryblu - I'm sad for your tree, but you are so lucky to live on a lake in MN! That's my ideal for the perfect place to be in summer.
As for diet plans, I've chosen to go with a low glycemic index diet, which seems to be how I really want to eat anyway, just couldn't get the motivation up to do much cooking! One thing I've found interesting so far is that Judith Beck talks about thin people not experiencing hunger as an emergency. I definitely think hunger is an emergency! So I always just want to eat cheese and crackers instead of cooking something when I'm hungry. This is definitely something I'll have to work on. I'm using WW as my back-up plan. I've done it before, but quit when the compulsive eating got out of control. I really liked the online stuff, the tracker is great and the recipe searcher is good too. I never really got into meetings either, but you gotta like the accountability at WW. |
thank you, all!
Oh, thanks, all...for your posts, your understanding about my tree.........and for including me. For the first time since I registered in March, I feel as if I belong.....I was posting on other threads, as you can see by the # of my posts, but for some reason, never found "home"..I am home....love to all. M
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Hey Everyone,
Things got busy again and I didn't get to the board for a few days. I hope everyone is doing well today. I'm glad there are 5 of us now, so much more to read! The fashion discussion is so interesting. I look at the teens with their buttcracks hanging out, underwear poofing out over the top of the pants, or some of the styles the girls wear that show everything you could ever want to see, and it amazes me. But then I remember how scandalized my grandmother was when I wanted a pair of hip hugger bellbottoms when I was 12. It really makes me laugh now to think of how radical that seemed! As far as the diet, I hope you are all doing well. I made it through 2 days back on plan and am averaging about 1500 calories. Hopefully, I can step up the activity level pretty quick and start kicking them fat cells to the curb again. I'll holler back later. I've got to go to bed now! L |
Hi everyone,
Back @ school this week so pretty busy. I'm on day 4 and feeling in control. I haven't lost a thing yet, but I'm so happy to feel in control. I'm doing this watcher technique that's in the 4-day Win Beck book, and I th ink it might be helping with compulsive eating, and I'm really enjoying the Weight Watchers plan. I think there is something really great about not depriving yourself of any food. I tell myself I can have anything, and I even can have a large portion, but I just have to be careful the rest of the day or couple days. More later... girly~ |
Hey Girly! Glad to see you're back on track. 4 whole days must be a real accomplishment. I succumbed to cookies tonight but I will just do as you're doing: be careful the next day or so. In the long run, it will all work out.
Hey you other chicks! Hope you're still doing well. L EDITED TO ADD SOME EARLY FRIDAY MORNING THOUGHTS: Hey all fellow thinkers, I'm really struggling with the desire to comfort-eat these days. My job is so stressful, my boss (a real devil-in-prada type who has no life and doesn't seem to want anyone else to have one either) is so disorganized and so uncommunicative which creates frequent unnecessary emergencies for the rest of us, that I sometimes wake up with this heavy dreadful feeling inside because I have to go to work. I struggle through each day, wanting to quit but knowing I have to stay to at least the end of the year and feeling trapped like a rat in a cage. I can see life outside the cage but just cant get to it. Sometimes that takes away the energy for exercise and often it causes food cravings that overwhelm my desire to deprive myself of those foods so that I can enjoy the longer term goal of a thinner healthier body. I just want to say that it's SO HARD to work on having a healthy "state of body" when you're in an unhealthy state of mind. I WILL do this. I WILL get there. It's just going to take longer than I want it to. I thank you all for your support and companionship. I'm hoping your successes will give me that burst of energy that will help me get over the mountain of misery that is standing between me and my willpower....or whatever it is that gives us those long strings of "good days" that add up to weight loss. Thanks for being here. And now I'm going to work. L |
Where is everyone?
Liannie, it was painful even to read your post. I'm sorry you have to go through that. That would be hard for me as well. I don't function well in disorder or chaos. I can really understand where you would want to soothe with food. Really understand. Since you have decided to stay to the end of the year, can you *OK, don't hate* make an appreciation list of where you are? I learned this in a spiritual group, and it has helped to feel better about my job until I get the next one. Just a list of what IS good. Like *I'm making a nice salary, and i can buy lots of nice meals out and wine and things for my beautiful new home.* *I get to see the mountains on my drive to work and that fills me up* *I enjoy talking with X* *I am learning great things for my next job* *I have a great office* *I have the most comfortable work chair and my butt feels good sitting in it ;)*I feel proud to be employed* *They have the best coffee at work and it's free* etc., etc. It's a really effective exercise. I did this just for my job, a few times, and then eventually I was able to do a similar appreciation list for a young supervisor at work that was giving me all kinds of grief. I tried to do the appreciation list for her at first but couldn't. Just seeing her would make me tense up and start feeling hatred. Anyhow, eventually doing the appreciation list for her, which took some baby steps, has made a HUGE difference. I can almost get into a peaceful place about her, and feel much better when I see her. The hatred is *poof* gone. (as of this week actually) I realized later that my feelings about her were mostly connected to my wanting to be in a new job, and feeling unhappy and unappreciated there (long before she came around), just manifested as her unappreciating. ************************************************** ** How are the Beck techniques going for you all? I haven't looked at the BDS in a while, but what I still do on a regular basis is ~sit down for my meals way more often ~enjoy/focus on every bite. This has become close to ingrained now. ~record my food (I can't seem to plan every meal and stick to it, tho...I really find my inner self resisting that so I"m letting it go for now. ) ~stopped deluding myself I could do a little better on planned exercise, but I have learned to do a lot more spontaneous exercise. Wow, you can really get in a lot of exercise just from parking far, walking to drop a letter in the mailbox, etc... I'm still loving her 4-day Win book, and would love to chat about that if anyone reads it. I'm feeling in control. I don't know when the shift happened, but it feels really great. Now hopefully I'll have some weight loss to go with all my new-found ways. I'm down a pound. Honestly, I reached such a low (a low with compulsive eating, most certainly not a low in weight) this time that I think I would even be happy with a pound a week, and I never in a million years thought I'd say that. I just don't want to be in that compulsive place. girly~ |
WOW. What powerful stuff, Girly! Thanks for the hand-up out of the dark pit I've been in. YES I CAN make that list. I just never thought of making one. THERE ARE things I used to appreciate but they have been drowned by this wave of anxiety that has been washing over me in recently. I will work on the list this weekend and let you know what changes it makes.
I still don't have the 4-Day Win book but I just ordered it from Amazon's website and should have it within the next 10 days. I would love to start a discussion about it. If I focus on happiness and self-improvement, I think I can get through these next few months. AND I want to join you in feeling that sense of control! I hate myself for the way I ate yesterday. Instead of getting back on track, I fell into fast-food frenzy because I let myself get too hungry (guess why? work, of course) and then followed the cravings all the way to Compulsion Central. Today is a new day though, and these are the Beck Principles I am generally following: --recording (on most days) --sitting down to eat (almost every day) --following an exercise plan (restarting today) --getting incidental exercise (every day) --practicing hunger tolerance (most days) --not overeating (most days) What do I really stink at? --overcoming cravings --emotional eating Since it's the emotional eating of the bad stuff that leads to the cravings, I see that as my next project. I will start by making that list. This is why I LOVE THIS GROUP! Just talking to you all lifts my spirits and enhances what little wisdom I have. Thanks for giving me some joy today. I hope a happy Saturday is had by all. I will holler back later or tomorrow. L |
Hello everyone,
G and L some inspiring concepts for dealing with a sense of overwhelming stress. For me the learning how to cope with my emotions and the NOT using food to calm, reward , energize or (over) celebrate is my true diet challenge. I truly know my "shoulds" it is my "don't want to do it" that keeps me fat. Most all of my work has been in the non-profit/service sector -being understaff dealing with a needy population along with ineffectual management-uggh. It sound like you have jobs that can be be so demanding with no time for acknowlegment of your accomplishments -in fact management may even limit you success. I have empathy but little advice about how to cope-love the list idea G. In a small way i work on the somewhat the same concept. I try to remind myself to focus on all that is going well in my life and appreciating that. Sometime I just want some force in the universe to tell me I am doing great and my efforts are so appreciated. -maybe a couple a times a week would be great-mean while back to reality. Right now I am using food to energize me. It has been very busy-much very good but I am exhausted with very painful and stiff joints. The big new is that we have a beautiful grand daughter-who had some stress moments in delivery but arrive being very healthy. We spend 9 hrs in the car to get a precious 1 hr visit with the happy family. Also was called in to work some days and my husband family visited. I am exhausted and know that hauling this extra 150 lb really adds being so tired. Here come the really illogical part-I have being eating high carbs and sweets. The very thing that made the extra fat- I crave. That crazed illogical brain. G- so glad to hear you are in control and feel good. Being in control is so powerful. Even if the scales don't move, you know that they will soon. Plus you did loose a LB. I am not even going to look at the scales until I am back on program a number of days. L, you are doing alot of the beck stuff-keep that up.- you have more than a little wisdom-you are one wise lady-plus being very witty. I hope to be joining you both soon modifiy my mindless eating. I don't have the 4 day book yet, but got a book on cd of Marths beck- the joy diet. Even in that she works on getting the old brain to be positive. sue |
Hi, all!
Just a quick HI to ALL!
A friend will be here shortly and we are going to ...imagine this....cook! lol. Fresh basil demands pesto.......and we are doing the tomato, fresh basil, fresh mozzerella, olive oil thing....there is a name for that.....but with all this fresh garden produce, oh...fresh cantaloupe..gotta do it. I have been so caught up in the openness of all your frank feelings....and some great wisdom from you all..I had forgotten about Beck! lol.....still haven't bought myself another book, but will be at B and N for a meeting on Wednesday, so plan to get both...haven't heard much about the new one. The appreciation list is a great idea.......I had a similiar issue with someone at work...it took a year with my psychologist to let go of it! Then I just let it go! It was *that* easy...who knew? lol. There are a couple of people I give way too much power to.......I let them punch my buttons...and the negativity comes out.....one is just the black and white kind...if I say up, she says down........if had said down, she would have said up......I just can't seem not to get caught up in trying to justify, defend what I have said...just a vicious circle.....why don't I just let it go??:dizzy::dizzy: |
Good Sunday Morning Chicks!
I hope everyone is doing well and enjoying this fine almost-fall day! Thanks for a great discussion about how we give our power away to others by letting them inflict anxiety upon us which we mistakenly try to blunt with food. Your ideas have shown me that this is exactly what it is--letting buttons be pushed (thanks for that Maryblu), dwelling on the negatives (thanks Girly), looking for validation outside ourselves (a big thanks to Sue for that one). It reminded me of a conversation I had last week. A recovering addict I was working with told me the best lesson he learned in one of his 12-step programs was this: There are only 2 rules in life. #1-Life is not fair. #2-Never forget Rule #1. It really makes sense. In fact, Girly, that's a "positive" to put on my list. My job gives me the opportunity to interact with people I may never have met otherwise and learn from them as well as helping them. Actually, that's what I love the most about it. It's management and the political crap that sometimes overshadows the pure pleasure of helping fellow human beings. But I'm not letting it bother me today. And I'm darn sure not overeating because of it for today. I guess I'll take it one day at a time, and today will be a good day. I'm determined to make it so. My Beck lesson for the day today will be overcoming cravings. I will stay on plan today and avoid sweets. And I will make a plan for next week, then buy only the groceries required for it. My overall goal is NO fast food during the week. How about you ladies? What's the plan for the coming week? What lessons do you plan to work on? L |
Originally Posted by coastalsue: Liannie, I'm so glad you are feeling better and that we all had some small part in it. You have helped me out of the hole a few times; specifically I can remember one time I had a total hissy fit a while back and both you and Sue were just fine about it. It helped that you didn't react and that I was still welcome here. Maryblu, your fresh food sounded AwESOME...hope it was fun. Yummy. My goals are to just *stick* to the new food plan, and to take time to relax--next week's going to be really busy. Hi to Veronica. ~girly |
Howdy,
thanks for sharing your insights. I struggle all of that stuff - letting go of angry-sometimes decades old, validating my own self worth (inspite of other's attitude), and appreciating all that is going right. One of the appeals of Beck is that changing the mind can affect the brain. I am always trying to read more stuff on mind changing-cognitive therapy ideas, meditation ideas ect. I am trying to understand and practice being mindful and being in the moment. Stop the brain chatter of "why did that happen", "what will happen" "why did they say that" and "if only". I have seconds of success in hours of rumminating. Love the rule #1 and #2 about life is not fair. It is so true and yet we are the lucky ones on this planet. While I hate being fat-unfair genes ect.-I am lucky that I have a disease that is curable- I have option to get healthier. It is time for me to return to an eating plan. Would love some feedback on which one. The past 50 lb were lost on a rather strict plan of 1400-1600cals a day and swimming 3-4 hrs a week which counted as 500 cals for each hr of swimming. Fitday showed I need over 3000 cals a day to maintain my weight so I should have lost between about 3 lb a week-It was much slower - more like 3 -4 lb a month. WW shows I should eat 33 pnts or about 1650 cals a day. Plus 35 flex pnts to be used over the week for another 1750 cals. There is a plan called Wendie which has a pattern for using the flex pnts so that each day you eat a varied amount of cals so the body doesn't get use to a set/fixed cals and doesn't adjusted to it-hopefully does not plateau so easily. I am actually scared to eat so much but tried of being so restricted all the time. Any info or suggestions about diets or ww in general? I don't have any ww meeting locally -can either use my old ww info or go on line. M- I love that basil and tomatoe dish-I think it has an italian name. yumm thanks to all for your support and insights sue |
Sue,
I'm finishing a week on WW with a weigh-in tomorrow. I was afraid of being starving all the time because that's how I remember WW, but so far, I've been fine (and I've lost 2#s now). The flex points are really cool b/c it helps to counter that deprivation beast that can get us all. Before I ate at about 18 points--that was the only way I lost. And I WAS starving all the time. Now with a heavier weight and their modified plan, I'm at 25 + the flex points. What Ive noticed after a week of playing around with points online is that they have made some newer adjustments on their plan for carbs. Like 1 C of onions is 0 but if the onions are cooked (onions are esp carby when cooked)then it's 1 point. Same with carrots. I think that's a change from when I did it many years ago. Also, all veggies are not free. Like I made a version of the old weight watchers soup and 1 cup is 0 points, but 2 cups is 1 point. So they've built in some (I think smart) new stuff into their plan. I thought before it was unlimited veggies pretty much across the board. (?) I'm afraid of if I can go down lower when my weight drops--you know, as they drop your points as your weight goes down. I was also afraid that I wouldn't lose eating that way, so I got onto their board and I asked if they new anyone in their experience who it hadn't worked for, who couldn't lose despite following the plan, and 9 people responded, some with many friends or workmates who had done it, and none of them knew of anyone for whom it didn't work. (when following plan) Right now they have a 1 week online FREE trial, which is what I've been doing. I will say their website is awesome and it makes tracking way easier via computer. For me, I didn't enjoy the meetings much, so for now I'm just going to try the online service, which is also cheaper than meetings. Hope that helps.... girly~ |
Hey Ladies, hope you all had good weekends. I really appreciate the discussion on here! I think sometimes even if we can't master our crazy compulsions yet, there's something empowering about recognizing them and saying "I know you're there and I'm going to let you win this time, but it's my choice" or something similar.
coastalsue - Congrats on the new grand-baby! maryblu - Your tomato/mozzerella salad sounds so good! girlythin - Glad you're enjoying WW! I'm thinking I may do that plan as well, I have all my materials from last time still. I had a crazy end of week here. I had a migraine for two days and of course had to take care of myself with ice cream and other junk-y, delicious food. :P I'm trying not to let it get me down. Because of being out-of commission for that, I didn't get the details of my diet and planning hammered down. I think I'm going to spend another week just recording everything after I eat it. Seems to be working okay so far. My parents came to visit, I haven't seen them in 3 weeks or so and they both said I look like I'd lost a couple pounds, so that's always encouraging! I just gave my 14-month old daughter some crackers and she's lying on her back, a cracker in each hand, so happy to eat them. I really don't want to pass on my food issues to her. I'm certain that my mom had a big hand in mine, although I have forgiven her for that, it would be better if Layla never has to deal with all this. |
evening everyone,
G-thanks for ww info-and the heads up about the changes. I am going for the free week. Got a make a change quick to avoid regaining weight. You have been struggling and it is great to hear your success both in losing weight and finding it easy to do. Congradulations. Veronica-sorry to hear about your migraine-hear they are horrible. I understand you wanting to break old unhealthy habits so your children don't have worry about weight issues. None of my kids are big foodie like me, Keep up with recording food, some say that is one of the best things to do to change eating patterns. Maryblu and Liannie-hope all is well to a lighter sue |
I like the fact that I work with some really cool people; that my salary is better than before I got a degree and now it has enabled me to have the brand new house I never imagined I would have; that I interact with people as a result of my job whom I may not otherwise have met; that I am able to touch people's lives now instead of merely punching a clock and pushing papers. OK, those are 4 things I like about this job I'm going to leave soon. I think I can hang on to those for a while. (Just wanted to get that said since I promised to post it over the weekend...)
And CONGRATS to you Girly for a successful week on WW! Yay! Get in that groove and stay there! Your success will carry the rest of us along in your tailwind. Sue, are you going to do WW too? I've done the calorie-count myself and have only been successful when very organized and fairly stringent. Is it easier to do points? Maryblu, I saw you over on Fat Smash saying you're starting tomorrow. Good for you! That has a lot of veggies, right? I love to eat them but can't seem to keep up with all the prep before they spoil in my crisper. Hopefully you'll teach us something about that. Veronica, so sorry to hear about the migraine. Something like that can really get in the way of a diet plan. Just hang in there and pick up where you left off when you can. As for my plan, I had a good day today foodwise and did my second workout in 3 days. I'm starting a 12 week challenge on the 22nd and I'm gearing up for all the weight lifting that will be involved. Building muscle will burn those calories and that's what will melt this blubber! Bye bye blubber! :D More tomorrow, L |
Originally Posted by Liannie: Hello to everyone. girly~ |
Weeeeeellllllllllll...uhhhmmmmmmm....mmmmmmmm
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See, the thing is...about starting Fat Smash.....see.........weelllll.....
I have been so caught up in my "diet dispair".....do this, do that....I did Fat Smash Phase I detox for 4 days awhile back and loved it......so why did I stop? dunno......it really makes me feel good.....I ran it through myfitday, and was getting over 35 gms. of fiber....about 1400 calories.....and really felt great. The biggest challenge is the meals away from home...the only restaraunt I have found where you can get a true FS lunch is Ruby Tuesday's salad bar.....and if you haven't tried it, it is awesome. All FS friendly, and great, great food. Of course any salad bar with Edamame on it is tops for me. So, No, have not started FS..or the diet QOD...have any of you seen that one? There is a website....it is intriguing....I was considering it, but never could make it through the fasting day! lol. The one good note to report, we are starting our study group week after next....there are 3 of us, and I am asking one more friend to join......it will be an odd assortment......good odd, not bad, and the big bonus for me is that they are 3 of my favorite friends, but they don't know each other.....yet....so, I think that will help a lot.......thanks all, for caring! I posted on another thread on gardening, so wanted to share this pic of my garden last July with all of you.....I have added lots more since then! (and, my beloved Plum tree is gone, but not yet "stumped", so I can't get the replacement in yet. *sigh) |
Maryblu, what a beautiful garden! How creative to differ the heights and colors the way you've done! Gardening is one of my non-food passions, and I can't wait to dig in next spring. I was hoping to plant some bulbs this fall but, until the fence gets put in I can't even put pencil to paper and make a design. So we'll see. If I have a fence by October 1, I may be asking your advice.
I hope everyone's day has gone well. It's 2 days in a row on plan for me. Wow, like a Cubs winning streak: 2 in a row. :D Happy Tuesday, L |
Hello everyone,
Maryblu- loved the garden- When I was kid there seem to be snow on the ground from Oct to MId June- we grew nothing. You place looks beautiful! hope you have fun and support in your new group-pass on your wisdom to us. Liannie-Yeah on 2 good days-that comfort food eating is the tough one for me. Either crave the food itself or the easy of preparation or purchase. Just open a bag and there it is-some wonderful tasty high carb, high cal treat. Versus cleaning, peeling, cutting, cooking and measuring some low cal healthy meal-add being tired and/or emotional - what a battle for me. Girly so glad WW is the one for you and your doing great! Veronica-thinking of you I am really struggling with getting my diet mojo working. Went on the WW site and still rather fumbling around. It is a bit of pain to go from cal counting to now doing the points. whine, whine, The real problem is that I am acting like a fat person and just dam* well don't care to think like a thin one. After all the months of weighing, measuring, limiting foods and counting and recording everything, I am just rebelling about going back. I have the Last Meal of the Condemned attitude( for days)-went shopping "over the hill" and ate both at a Thai and Mexician resturante along with having an Ice Cream cone from B&R-if one treat was good, 6 are better. I have been recording pnts today and am sure that I''ll finish today on target. I am finding there is an amazing amounts of points due to large starting weight. I do wonder if I was eating too little earlier as ww has me eat about 3500 cal a week more than I was.-Plus I swim for an reduction of another 1500 cal a week. The scary part to WW is dealing with wider range of food-I understand using some points for a treat but I am scared that I can't handle it. Kind of like offering the one drink to someone who has been sober for months. what will happen? Yet so bored with the older strict regime. Sure hope I will continue to be on target. I have to do something-do not want to regain the Weight-I want to weight LESS. sue |
Hey everyone, we made it half-way through the week! Nothing exciting going on here, hope you all are good. I'm sooo annoyed at my SO for not cleaning anything in the house. He's been promising for 3 days to do the dishes. I've not been doing them because I think he should do at least one chore around the house. (He stays home all day with our daughter. I know being a stay-at-home parent isn't easy, but I watch her all weekend and still manage to clean the whole place, do laundry, and grocery shopping and everything else). I think I'm going to go for a walk and leave them for him. If I stay here, the filth will get to me! Can you tell this is a sore spot for me?! :rollpin: He's lucky I love him, haha!
In thoughts actually related to weight loss, I've been trying to pay attention to my hunger a lot more so I can actually learn when my body needs more food. I've noticed that I seem to get stomach hunger, which only gets worse until I eat, and sort of a throat hunger, which is a tingling feeling in the back of my throat that feels like I'm hungry, but if I can ignore it or pay attention to something else it goes away. I swear, our bodies are nuts! Does anyone else get this? I'm totally perplexed. I never thought that my body would be against me, only my mind. :?: I also got a copy of "The Thin Books," which have neat daily meditations/thoughts/mental exercises for compulsive eaters for every day for a year. Today's is trying not to take your problems tooo seriously all the time and learning to laugh at yourself. In that spirit, I'm going to go laugh at my pigsty of a house! |
coastalsue - Thanks for keeping me in your thoughts! I hope you finish out the day okay with your WW points. I can see how the transition from calories to points could be hard, a whole new set of numbers to memorize. bleg!
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Hey All,
Sue, I'm right there with you on that comfort food thing. A momentary pleasure trip at the end of a spoonful of something creamy and fatty seems like it's the answer to everything sometimes, doesn't it? And you are SO right about all the chopping, cooking, etc. That's why I eat fast food salads and Subway subs sometimes---just for a break from the kitchen. And Veronica, I ate cake this afternoon that a friend brought in from her daughter's birthday party and the sugar really sparked my cravings. I wasn't able to eat dinner because I wanted to stay under 1600 calories today, so I left work hungry tonight. I can tolerate the "empty stomach" feeling but the cravings were pretty intense. How I wanted to just hit a drive through and chow down! For me it's an unsettled, edgy feeling that seems to eminate from my throat and stomach. I really WANT the food, whether I'm physically hungry or not. Tonight I resisted because I didn't want to hate myself in the morning. Girly, I hope you're out there kickin butt on those fat cells. Maryblu, let us know how your group goes. Gotta go now. Bedtime calls. L |
Greetings All!
Dear All,
First a quick clarification.......what you saw was two of my MANY gardens....I have two more that size, one huge shade garden and an entire bank that has been naturalized with ferns and daylilies, and then my BIG flower garden....BIG..the backbone of it is Garden Phlox, with lilies, Monarda, Rudbeckia, Shasta Daisies, hostas, and hmmm..lots more besides. And I have a brand new one all prepped and ready to plant, and the garden hose laid out for a third garden beyond the two you saw in the picture. Never let it be said I can't be obsessive...lol.... On to the discussion at hand.....my Beck support group and a big surprise today...I see a pyschologist, just a good "check up from the neck" as Zig Ziegler loves to say........hadn't seen him since May..walked in today......and BANGO.....he was the incredible shrinking shrink! He has lost over 60 #s!! Wow. Since we spend so much time discussing my wt. I thought it only fair to discuss his.....It was great to see, and just goes to show, all of us have our demons and our struggles, no matter how smart or successful, and he has chosen to take one of his on and win!! Sue, I have seen so many people be successful with WW. It is the one diet that seems to help everyone who follows it.....and I know that when I lost my wt. initially, I didn't cut back too much at all.....just ate less, felt less full, and lost 5 #s a month......it is such a mistake for people with a lot to lose to be too drastic in the beginning. I think the point thing with WW is ingenious.....not only does it absolutely make sense to base the pts. on how much you weigh, but the way the pts. are calculated is ingenious.....calories, fat, fiber.......period........lol.....you don't have any wiggle room.....fried chicken has its calories from fat and there is NO fiber........eat it and pay the points penalty! Ingenious.....lol......I hope you trust it and do it, cuz the people I know who do it are very methodical, but very sure of themselves, and not all shook up....they just count the points day after day......if you eat the points you should for your wt. you might stall for a little while, but you will start to go down if you follow the program. I think it is a great plan for you long term. And above all.........be sure to do as I say and not as I do!!!! :D:D |
Originally Posted by maryblu: I'm still waiting for The 4 Day Win to come from Amazon. They say they shipped it today, but I got the free shipping because I ordered something else as well, so it's coming by snail mail and may not get here for another week. I'm anxious to do some reading in that one. I hope everybody is doing well. L |
hey friends,
i'm completely, completely wiped, but still wanted to read your posts and say a quick hello. maryblu, your garden is like a dream~ I still feel in control. I'm 1.5 weeks, and 4.5 down. I don't weigh in officially for the 2nd week till Monday, and this is remarkable weight loss for me. I feel like even saying it will jinx it. I'm having some obsessiveness return today. Just wanting to stuff my face, but I haven't done it. I think it's purely from stress. I need to slow down, prep better meals b/c I get better and more food when I cook it myself, and go back to doing the watcher exercise of Beck's that's really effective for me. I feel really grateful today. ~girly |
HI everyone,
I think I am liking WW-I have done day 2-I am enjoying the increased amount of foods and greater variety. I have been doing a type of yoyo dieting-super strict and rigid and then short bouts of binging and back to being strict. Maybe a bit more food and variety each day will work. Congrads to you Girly for success. Sorry that demon of exhaustion is trying to get you to overeat- Sound like you have some plans for tools to fight cravings also. L-I have the 4 day book on hold at the library so i'll get it one day. Hope all is well for you Maryblu-keeping sending more pics of handiwork. I don't know how to do those tricks yet with the computer. Thanks for WW support. Hope the TBDS group was good stuff. Just finshed a one day workshop on mediatation and practising compassion. I actually use some of the techniques to stop focusing on cravings. All part of the powerful stuff that the mind can. Veronica-never felt hunger in my throat-much more in my stomach along with increase tension and irritability. Hope the dishes are done, housekeeping tasks which are undone for long times drive me crazy. I was wished we could afford a maid. -basically it was been me-I couldn't wait until messy drove my partner crazy enough to do them. You all take care-Tommarrow we are off to Oakland and see our new grand daughter and visit her parents for 3 days. I will not post again until Sunday night. Get thinner you all sue |
Wow, Sue and Girly! Good for you two getting in control! Girly, I am SO IMPRESSED AT THAT WEIGHT LOSS! And SO happy for you. You and Sue both deserve the success. If wishing made it so, you'd both be slim as whippets right about now, and I've been wishing for you as hard as you've been wishing yourselves.
Just a quickie post for me too. I have tons to do and another early rising day tomorow. I have to go work out of town at a health fair. It will be fun though. Yo Maryblu! What up Veronica? :) More tomorrow, L |
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